Woman goes 'full Karen,' storms out of hair salon after being 15 minutes late. AITA?

"AITA for leaving a hairdresser after I was late?"

I booked with a new hairstylist. I was running about 5-10 minutes late — not great, but traffic, life happens — so I messaged her to give her a heads-up. When I got to the salon, surprise! The door was locked.

No code, no instructions, no “hey here’s how you get inside.” I was just standing there like an awkward little goblin outside the building, texting her for help. (She admitted to forgetting to send me the entrance instructions.)

She took a few minutes to respond, and by the time I actually entered the salon, found her little unit, etc. it was closer to 15 minutes late. Fine, whatever, I’m finally here. Now, you’d think the first interaction would be something like, “Hey! So sorry about the door!” or “No worries, glad you made it!” LOL NO.

Instead, this woman (who, reminder, I have never met) sits me down and immediately hits me with, “Just so you know, if you’re this late again, I won’t have time to see you,” followed by calling me “sweets” in the most condescending tone. Not even TOUCHING MY HAIR she legitimately is wasting more time lecturing me.

She has a attitude now and tells me I’m wrong when I say it took her a few minutes to respond and shows me her phone which says she replied a minute after my message but my phone says 3 minutes so I say well we are wasting minutes doing this.

At that point, my soul just straight-up left my body. I politely said that yes, I was late, but I had messaged, and also maybe the “abandoned outside in the elements” situation didn’t exactly help.

I even offered to shorten the service if needed. But between the locked door, the passive-aggressive lecture, attitude and the “sweets” that felt more like a slap, I realized: I don’t need this.

I tell her that the vibe between us is not conducive to a good rapport nor is it a relationship worth having. So I left. Didn’t pay, didn’t pass GO, didn’t offer a consolation, didn’t re book. I just grabbed my stuff and headed home.

I told my friends, and now they’re joking that I went “full Karen” for walking out. So now I’m second-guessing myself. AITA for walking out of a hair appointment after being locked out, getting attitude, and deciding my peace was worth more than this?

Later, OP edited the post to include:

1) I left early but there was a accident highway was closed due to investigations causing side roads to be heavy.

2) No the door was not locked because the business was closed. She said it was always locked and that she forgot to tell me this.

3) I did apologize when I first entered the salon area, it’s when I mentioned skipping a trim and style.

4) She is the owner and makes her own rules, fees, etc.

Here's what people had to say about this one:

Lurker_the_Pip said:

No way! I’m proud of you! NTA. You don’t have to spend time or money on anybody and she presented herself as a condescending unprepared jerk.

Big_Easy_Eric said:

I don't blame you for leaving. Having a good report with the person doing your hair is important, IMHO. This is the person who you're trusting to listen to you and make you look your best.

Traffic and life happens. Forgetting to tell the new client how to get into the building happens. The first meeting should have gone both ways with apologies and not a lecture. It sounds like you were contrite but she has to be right. That wouldn't work for me either.

Jarrdanka said:

NTA. I really dislike when people's expectations about me do not match their expectations about themselves. You messed up, but so did she. You also let her know in advance, proposed other solutions (shortening the service) and she still took time to lecture you without apologizing. I would left too.

Particular-Try5584 said:

Nah, you are NTA. This woman is going to be cutting/coloring your hair right? You are going to be walking around for a least six weeks with her attitude on full display. No thank you. I was sitting there thinking “I’d walk out at sweets, why is she still there?” and then…you walked out. Sounds about what I’d have done, and I don’t think I am a Karen or an AH. Sounds like you voted with your feet over crappy service.

espresso_diva said:

I would have absolutely not trusted that person with my hair after that interaction and would have left too. It’s too much risk for someone with a pissy attitude to end up screwing you for literal months with a hair job that you utterly hate. NTA.

bbkeeneisme said:

NTA. I went to a new single stylist salon for a consult . I saw the stylist on the sidewalk sweeping as I drove up. Got out of my car and said hi I’m bbkeene, she acknowledged me and walked inside, I followed her.

She then lectured me for 10 minutes for just walking into her salon with out texting her to let her know I was there. I said you were outside and I spoke when I walked up, you responded to me. She said it didn’t matter I should have texted to let her know I was there. I told her I felt like this wasn’t going to work out and left.

MadHatterine said:

NTA. The moment someone calls me "Sweets" I am out of there, no matter what.
You also did not went full Karen. You did not ask to see her manager. Tell your friends that they are making you second guess yourself - maybe they just try to nag but do not actually mean it.