Woman refuses to babysit sister's kids, 'she called me IRRESPONSIBLE.' AITA?

"AITA for refusing to babysit my sister’s kids after she called me 'irresponsible' for not wanting children?"

I (29F) have always been clear about not wanting kids. I like my freedom, I travel often, and I’m not really a “kid person.” My sister, Lisa (34F), is the complete opposite. She has three kids under the age of 7 and loves being a mom. I respect that, and I’ve always been supportive — attending birthdays, helping out during emergencies, and even babysitting occasionally.

Recently, during a family dinner, the conversation shifted to kids and parenting. My mom made an offhand comment about how she “couldn’t wait” for me to have kids, and I politely reminded her that it’s not in my plans.

Lisa jumped in, saying I was being “selfish” for not wanting to “carry on the family legacy.” I tried to laugh it off, but she kept pushing, saying things like, “You’ll regret it when you’re old and alone,” and “Being a mom is the greatest joy in life.”

I calmly said that not everyone has the same aspirations, and I’m happy with my life. That’s when she hit me with, “Well, maybe if you weren’t so irresponsible, you’d see the value in raising kids.” I was stunned. I have a stable career, own my own home, and generally have my life together. I don’t see how not wanting kids equates to irresponsibility.

The conversation ended awkwardly, but the next day Lisa texted me, asking if I could babysit her kids for the weekend because she and her husband wanted a break. I replied that I wasn’t available. She pushed, saying I “owed” her since I “never have real responsibilities” and that watching her kids would “give me a taste of what I’m missing.”

I refused, saying I wasn’t comfortable babysitting after her comments and that I didn’t appreciate being insulted one day and expected to help the next. She blew up, calling me petty and saying “family helps family.” My parents are now on her side, saying I should just let it go and “be the bigger person.” AITA for refusing to babysit after what she said?

Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:

ConfidentCelesty said:

NTA. if she thinks you're irresponsible for not having kids, then why would she let her kids be with you? She and your parents are ahole for pushing their belief in you.

[deleted] said:

Tell her wanting a break from her kids is irresponsible. Or tell her no, because you don’t want to deprive her of the greatest joy in life- being a mom to her kids.

RubySwaan said:

She called you irresponsible for your life choices and then wants you to watch her kids? That’s rich. Your parents are enabling her bad behavior. You’re not being petty; you’re setting boundaries. She needs to apologize before she gets any favors.

spacemouse21 said:

NTA. After her trying to read you the riot act for making your own life choices she’s trying to guilt you into taking care of hers. Stick to your guns. She owes you apologies and maybe some other time you can decide if your sanity will be preserved dealing with this craziness. You got this! Good luck.

DannHutchings said:

NTA. Your sister insulted you and then immediately expected you to help her out. That’s not how respect works. If family helps family, then that should include respecting each other’s choices, not just demanding favors.

ToastetteEgg said:

NTA. Why would she need a break from her greatest joy? Why doesn’t she think her kids will carry on the family legacy? It’s all ridiculous.