Woman refuses to see her cousin after he 'killed' her cat, 'I was furious.' AITA?

"AITA for refusing to see my cousin after he 'killed' my cat?"

Last year, I (19F now) celebrated my 18th birthday on January 5th. In the Philippines, this is a "debut,” which is similar to a quinceañera. It was a huge event for my family, especially since everyone was already together after New Year’s.

I had professional photos taken for the occasion, but I also wanted a special picture with my cat on the special day. I have a male orange tabby who was once a stray and is now fixed, named Tang. He’s a huge part of my life, and I always keep him inside the house unless I’m with him.

On my debut, I was looking for Tang to take that special photo, but I couldn’t find him anywhere. I started panicking because he’s an indoor cat and never goes far. I asked my cousins to help me look for him, but it was difficult as there's a lot of orange strays in the area. Eventually, my cousin (25M) came up to me and said he had "found him."

He pulled what looks to be meat out of a bag, and my heart dropped, I thought he had killed my cat. I completely broke down, crying and freaking out in front of everyone. (As much as I hate it, both dogs and cat still get butchered for meat here but hidden away from the authorities).

As it turned out, my cousin was pulling a prank. What he had was actually rabbit meat to be cooked for my birthday (rabbit meat also made me fully uncomfortable. I didn't eat that dish.) It just seriously looked like a cat's anatomy and it freaked me out.

I found out that he had taken Tang to my uncle's without asking me because my family thought Tang was “getting in the way” while food was being prepared for my party. I was furious. I yelled at my cousin, told him to return Tang immediately, and demanded that he leave the celebration. He left, I was upset but I didn't let it bother me as Tang was safe.

Fast forward to this year. I didn’t want my cousin at my birthday party because of what happened last year, and I made that clear to my parents. Despite this, my aunt insisted that I was being dramatic and said my cousin should be allowed to come. He showed up uninvited, I confronted him and told him again that he wasn’t invited. He told me to take a joke and that it was in the past.

I snapped and told him I didn’t ever want to see him again. My aunt jumped in, calling me a “big b” and accusing me of being narcissistic for making my birthday about myself. (ISN'T IT SUPPOSED TO BE ABOUT MYSELF?)

The argument escalated until my dad and granddad stepped in. My aunt and cousin eventually left, but it didn’t end there. A few days later, my aunt started posting in the family group chat, calling me rude, difficult, and selfish.

That I couldn't take a joke or that I don't know how to forgive and that I will be sent to h&ll. She claims that I ruined my debut and this year’s birthday celebration with my behavior. AITA for refusing to see my cousin after what happened last year?

Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:

TurboWaffleKing said:

NTA. That's so not funny making someone think there animal died. I don't have a pet but I would be horrified if I owned a pet and someone did that to me. Both your cousin and especially your aunt sound like AH's. Hopefully your dad and granddad are supportive of your decision. Your birthday, you choose who gets invited.

Srvntgrrl_789 said:

NTA. You’re better than me. I’d probably be in jail if someone pretended to butcher my cat. I’m sorry he traumatized you. He’s a massive AH, and you’re right in not wanting to have him in your vicinity.

ScarletDevi69 said:

You can write something maybe like..."You’re absolutely right, Auntie. How dare I make my birthday about myself? Clearly, it should have been all about Cousin's amazing sense of humor and his groundbreaking cat-meat prank. So fogive me for not accepting the apology." NTA by the way.

buzzfrightyears said:

NTA. What sort of sick mind comes up with a prank like that?

starksdawson said:

NTA. That is SO mean. There is nothing okay about a "prank" like that. Pranks are only okay if EVERYONE involved finds them funny. Your birthday was supposed to be about you, and your cousin is a jerk for gaslighting you into thinking it’s not supposed to be.

wlfwrtr said:

NTA. You were shown a body of a dead animal and told it was your beloved cat. Anyone would have a hard time getting over that. You don't have any reason to forgive someone who apparently has shown no remorse. Saying it's just a joke isn't remorse.

crashcanuck said:

NTA. Anyone that would make the death of a beloved pet in to a prank deserves no kindness or courtesy. I say this because if I were any less polite I would quickly say something that would get me banned.