My husband (35M) and I (33F) have been married for 6 years and together for 10 (we knew each other forever, lol). We have 3 kids. When we got married, we were both pharmacists. Two years into our marriage, my husband opened a family business with his father, and the business is doing really well.
My husband gets 50% of the net revenue and owns a good amount of money, but everything is tied up in the company, and the balance is updated every year as the business grows. His father is worried that if we ever get divorced, I’ll ask for half of the business’s money, so he wants me to sign a document relinquishing that right.
For context, we’re Muslims, and in Islam, the woman is entitled to what was agreed upon prior to marriage in case of divorce. For me, that amount is around $120,000, and our house is already 50/50, so I wouldn’t ask for anything more.
However, I don’t want to sign anything. I feel my husband should trust me when I say I would never ask for half of his share ins the business. I also pointed out that his dad didn’t ask his mom to sign such a document, so why should I have to? So, AITA for refusing to sign this?
Opposite-Progress990 said:
NTA. Asking for a post marital contract 6 years and 3 kids into the marriage is absurd. If they wanted a prenup, that ship sailed before the wedding. The double standard with your MIL makes it even more insulting. Your word and Islamic marriage contract should be enough. This feels like your FIL trying to control things and your husband not standing up for you. Hold your ground.
WHODATSAIDD said:
It must be doing really well for him to ask about it now, do not sign. NTA.
Suckerforcats said:
NTA, but if your husband contributed any of your joint marital funds to the business, you could be entitled to some of it or at the very least, those funds back. Do not sign anything without your own lawyer (not his) reviewing it.
nylonvest said:
NTA. Hopefully your husband drops it. But if he doesn't what you should do is demand that if they want you to consider signing something, you need a lawyer, and you expect the business or your father in law to pay for it, and then talk to the lawyer about it.
I expect the lawyer will tell you not to be a fool and if you're willing to give up your claim to the business in a divorce you should get something of value in exchange. Such as, say, an extra $100,000 right now. Or an agreement that you get the house in a divorce fully, not 50%.
Ok_Stable7501 said:
I wouldn’t sign unless MIL signs. NTA.
abba-zabba88 said:
Absolutely do not ever think of signing this document, part of the reason why he can do well in the business is because you assist with his home life. GIRL DO NOT SIGN A DARN THING. NTA.
First, I want to sincerely thank everyone for their words. I truly benefited from each and every comment, and I felt so empowered reading your perspectives. I couldn’t sleep last night thinking about what to say to my husband. He usually wakes up around 5 AM to go to the gym and have his coffee in peace before the kids wake up, so I decided to wake up with him (hello, headache all day!).
I told him that I was completely shocked when he asked me to sign this document—especially since he was actually okay with me signing it. I asked him, How can you say I’m not entitled to anything? I work my ass off from 9 to 5, then come home to cook, take care of the kids, and handle bedtime.
And at the end of the month, I don’t see a penny—everything goes to the bills. Sure, he pays for our trips, clothes, and gifts, but I never ask for anything or tell him what to buy me.
Then I brought up religion. I told him, If you want to talk about religion, let’s be fair about it. Islamically, my money is my own, and you’re not supposed to use it. If that’s the case, I want every dollar I earned back—around $300K for the five years I worked. I also told him that if he really wants me to sign, I will—but with my own lawyer. Because apparently, I’ve been too naïve and should have known better.
Finally, I told him that we were supposed to be saving together, but now he’s saying that in case of divorce, I get nothing? So what was all my hard work for? At one point, I got really emotional and started crying because I was genuinely hurt that he thought this was okay. That’s when he hugged me, apologized, and promised he wouldn’t ask me to sign anything.
He even said he’s willing to put half of everything in my name right now—just not the controlling rights and whatnot. I still have a lot to process, and the meeting with the account who suggested this in the first place but at least for I feel heard. Thank you all again for your support!
AnakaliaKehau said:
I’m so happy to hear this update and hope your husband stays in your corner and stands up to his father. Good luck.
Amberfrostt said:
NTA. This guy is giving off major creep vibes. His initial messages were already a bit off, with the excessive compliments and personal questions. But his behavior in class today is definitely concerning. You were right to block him and avoid him. Trust your instincts.
solcrav said:
NTA, but I'd say divorced him if you can, these financial abusers will always try different tactics. Of course he is so remorseful now and bla bla. This man will weaponize anything against you when he has a chance. Don't fall for his caring facade, its all acting until waters sre calm again.
SnooWords4839 said:
Good for you. From now on, put your money into an account, he can't access.
baithammer said:
Pre-nups are prior to marriage, hence the pre affix - they can't be sought after the marriage has occurred.
cheerfulberrymist said:
NTA – It's totally fair to question the prenup request. Marriage is about partnership, fairness, and respect, especially when you're putting in a lot of work and responsibility. It makes sense that you were hurt by his request and wanted to highlight your own contributions, both financially and emotionally.