Woman rejects a kitten from her parents, 'we’ve been in deep mourning ever since.' AITA?

"AITA for rejecting a gifted kitten 26 hours after my pet passed away?"

My gf 31F and I 30F recently lost a beloved family member our nearly 20-year-old cat. I’ve always said that when she passed, I might consider adopting elderly cats. I’ve had her since I was 10 and took over full-time care when I was 21. She passed away a week ago, and we’ve been in deep mourning ever since.

The day after she passed, my dad knocked on our door. My gf answered and asked why he was there. He said, “I just felt like giving you a hug.” They hugged, and then she told me he was here. I hugged him too, and he said, “Your mum came down too.” I said it was lovely of them to visit.

That’s when my mum walked through the entryway, smiling and holding a cat carrier. My gf immediately looked concerned and asked, “You haven’t?” I asked if they had brought down our other cat, but they said no. After this, I realized they were trying to gift us a kitten, the same breed as our recently passed cat. My gf and I were both shocked/upset. I told them we appreciated the thought but didn’t want it.

They asked if they could bring the kitten inside to use the litter box since it had been in the car for an hour. Reluctantly, we agreed, which we now regret. I didn’t want the poor kitten to suffer because of this. They told us the kitten was only eight weeks old, needed a home. They also mentioned it was already litter-trained all while placing it in the litter box.

They said they thought we’d like it. I reiterated that while we appreciated the thought, it had only been just over a day since our cat passed. My mum chuckled at this. When I saw the tiny kitten trying to climb out of the litter box, I started crying. My gf asked if I wanted to step into the other room to calm down. I went to get a drink and compose myself.

Meanwhile, my gf repeatedly asked my them to take the it and leave. Instead, they kept talking about how cute it was and tried to get her to hold it. My dad said he’d get it but just wandered around following it, hands in his pockets. Finally, my gf raised her voice, telling them firmly to pick up the kitten and leave.

I returned to console her, and at that point, they finally picked up the kitten and headed out. I followed them to make sure they were leaving. My mum was already in the car, and my dad lingered at the door. While saying goodbye, he apologized, saying my mum was sorry as well.

He asked, “Will you ever want a new cat?” I replied, “I’m not sure, but if we do, it won’t be that kitten.” After that I went back inside to console my gf.

Now my parents are messaging me, first trying to pretend it didn't happen. Then me asking for space with them responding I'm in a mood over a kitten and it was out of love. I’ve asked them for space, but they aren’t respecting it.

Meanwhile, my gf is worried that she overreacted and lost her composure I can’t shake the feeling that I messed up with my parents. Their persistent messages begging me to reconnect only make things worse. I keep questioning if I overreacted to what they did AITA?

Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:

diminishingpatience said:

NTA. Even if they made the initial mistake with good intentions, they repeatedly ignored what you both wanted.

Unhappy-Quail-2645 said:

NTA. I don’t understand why people that don’t live with ever think it’s acceptable to gift a pet. It’s one thing if you said I would like a new pet right away, but to just go out and do that without even talking to your partner? I’m so sorry for your loss.

Pure-Philosopher-175 said:

NTA. They might have had good intentions but this was actually very rude and presumptuous on their part. You don’t just gift people a new pet, especially when those people are grieving another pet they have recently lost. The fact that your parents cannot accept how wrong this was makes them major AHs. I’m so sorry about your kitty.

We had to put our older fur baby to sleep earlier this year, after having her for more than 14 years, and I still miss her. If someone had shown up on my doorstep after a week with a replacement cat, I’d have lost it at them. We’ve talked about getting another cat but we just can’t yet.

Humble_Scarcity1195 said:

NTA. A pet is never a gift. Although having the family cat stay with you for a little while could help the grieving process, having a new kitten is unlikely to. I would just end up resenting the kitten which isn't fair to it at all.

jordy_muhnordy said:

NTA. Pets shouldn't be given as a gift, your parents should have talked about this with you prior to adopting the kitten.

Leading_Ad_1720 said:

NTA. A pet is not a gift that you spring on someone as a complete surprise ever. Their timing makes things even worse.