Woman with service dog makes sister's wedding 'about her.' AITA? 'I'm choosing my dog over her.'
"AITA for making my sister’s wedding 'about me' by bringing my service dog?"
I (28F) have a service dog, Lucy, who’s been with me for four years. I have a chronic condition that causes sudden fainting spells, and Lucy is trained to alert me before an episode so I can sit down, and she’ll stay with me during an episode until I’m alert again. It’s a life-saving measure and has become a non-negotiable part of my daily life.
When my sister (30F) got engaged, I was thrilled and, of course, very excited to attend her wedding. I reached out well in advance to let her know I’d be bringing Lucy along, expecting her to understand. But my sister was less than thrilled. She claimed Lucy would “distract” from her big day and that having a dog there would make it less elegant.
My sister suggested I “just leave her at home for a few hours” or that I sit near the back where “people won’t see her.” This upset me because, as I explained to her, Lucy is there for my safety and it’s genuinely unsafe for me to go anywhere without her. I offered to keep her as out-of-sight as possible and assured her that Lucy is highly trained and would stay by my side quietly.
But my sister dug in her heels. She told me I was “making this all about me” and asked why I couldn’t “just be normal for one day.” When I said I couldn’t risk my health or safety, she accused me of “choosing my dog over her.”
Our family is split. My parents think I should respect my sister’s wishes since it’s “her special day,” but a few of my friends believe she’s being unreasonable. I’ve even thought about skipping the wedding to avoid the whole mess, but I know that would upset her too. So, AITA for insisting on bringing my service dog to my sister’s wedding?
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
Ok_Historian_646 said:
WTF??? Your parents actually agree with her? Your service dog is for medical reasons, not a general pet like most. Im actually quite disgusted by the fact that they think you should just be "normal" for one day! NTA!!! OP, I am so sorry this is happening to you!
MasterGas9570 said:
NTA - I am disgusted by your family that is choosing a party over your health and safety. And why in the world would a dog distract people at the wedding? Is it going to be so incredibly boring that the only thing that could possibly entertain them is a dog that is sitting/lying quietly on the ground not moving or making a noise? Either take the dog, or don't go, but keep Lucy with you.
Famous-Composer3112 said:
NTA, of course. If I had a sister who was prone to fainting, I'd let her bring her dog, her cat, her horse, and her doctor. She could come in a horse-drawn carriage, for all I care. You sister is a bridezilla, and that's the NICE word for her.
EfficientSociety73 said:
NTA but your family certainly are. Wow! Yes just put your life at risk so your sister can have her dream wedding. It will all be fine. And if you pass out it won’t cause any sort of disruption.
And you certainly shouldn’t do it on purpose just to spite her. Don’t bother going to this wedding. It won’t be her last if this is how she treats people and obviously she cares more about her “vision” than her sister. And so do your parents. I’m sorry you have such uncaring people in your life.
elisbellex said:
NTA. Your dog is essential for your health and safety, and you gave your sister plenty of notice. It's unreasonable for her to ask you to risk your well-being for the sake of her wedding. It's a shame that she's not being more understanding, but your health should always come first.
MrsRetiree2Be said:
NTA. Don't go. It's a win-win. Your health and safety remain intact. Her "perfect" day remains intact.