"My SMIL thinks my daughter is the child she never got to have. Help! Can you give me advice?"
Acronym Definitions: SMIL: Stepmother-in-law; MIL: Mother-in-law; FIL: Father-in-law; DH: Dear Husband; DD: Dear Daughter; DS: Dear Son.
My SMIL is generally a lovely woman, she's kind, helpful and sweet. But lord recently I want to strangle her. Background: FIL married SMIL when DH was a teenager so they've been together for quite a while now.
She has had infertility issues in the past and after countless failed IVF tries found out they couldn't have children. I think one of the benefits of marrying FIL was that she would inherit two sons, even if they were close to being legal adults, I guess she knew one day they would have children and she'd be a grandmother.
Now this brings me to my issue. Before I gave birth to DD I knew an influx of annoying stuff was coming my way because there hasn't been a girl born into the family for a long time. But I definitely didn't think it would be this bad. When I was pregnant with DD, my SMIL bought me 4 bin bags worth of clothes.
Despite my specific request for no one to buy me clothes because a) she will grow out of in a matter of weeks so it's a waste of money b) my in laws have a tendency to buy clothes that say shit like 'grandma's NO1 girl', 'daddy's girl' etc.
When I told my SMIL that I learnt my mistake last time around and that I won't even have people wait in the delivery room because of the sstorm that was the birth of my first child (a whole other story of my SMIL vs MIL in who can outcry each other).
She knows I have clear boundaries and has seen the repercussions when people overstep them with my MIL.
So instead of complaining to me she said 'Oh ok I understand' but I was told by FIL later on that she cried herself to sleep every night for a week. I have a good relationship with my SMIL so this did hurt me to hear but at the same time it felt like a guilt trip.
I sat her down and told her this wasn't about her and of course she'll be involved in my daughter's life just hold off for a bit. She seemed to understand but she clearly didn't because the past year has been difficult to say the least. This leads me up today. I'll bullet point to make it more organised.
She constantly refers to my daughter as variations of 'Her precious little girl' ( a common trend that my in laws all have tbh, my mother pointed out how weird it was). I walked in on her hovering over DD in her crib, saying 'You're the child I have prayed for my little girl, god has truly answered my prayers'
Tried to give my daughter a middle name because I got to give DD her first name... um that's not how it works. (The name she chose was what she picked for the child that she miscarried so I was very creeped out.)
Probably one of the weirdest things is when she said 'She's so beautiful! She got that from you. It's a shame... I always wanted to see my features on my child. Maybe we can say she has my eyes?' I actually just looked at her like wtf.
When my daughter cries, this woman turns into Usain Bolt himself, and goes to pick her up saying 'Shh I'm hear now, you're ok, nothing can hurt you'. What was going to hurt her SMIL daf?
The guilt trips! Now I'm very reluctant on my children sleeping over at peoples houses because they're still very young. But despite this she still constantly asks. 'Can I have DD over for the night?'
Gives reason 'What about next week?' Gives reason. Now she makes statements i.e. 'I've set up the whole nursery and she hasn't even used it once haha! creepily stares at me.
I need some advice I don't know how to handle this. Sometimes I'd rather she just be like my MIL just an upfront asshole because I can deal with that I just don't know how to deal with passive aggressiveness.
Technically she doesn't overstep my boundaries but she'll find loopholes or guilt trips. I get it! You didn't get to have children, honestly I feel for you but that doesn't mean my daughter is going to be the baby you've always wanted to have.
However she has been there for me and is honestly a sweet person overall but ever since I've had my daughter she has become overbearing.
DH loves his dad and my SMIL and his dad can't bear his wife being upset. So I know if DH and I try to talk to her formally about it (I've told her on the small occasions directly) she'll cry and guilt trip (maybe not even intentionally) I don't know how to handle weepy people. Any advice?
Before we give you OP's 6 updates, let's take a look at some of the comments offering advice:
hetres writes:
I know this is old, but I just wanted to say this: Patriarchal societies like ours encourage women to develop more covert ways of gaining power because to be overtly powerful is to be a "b&h" or some other slur implying she's "too masculine" somehow.
Many women don't care about this, for better or worse. Others develop this quiet, feminine power and use it for good.
Your SMIL is not using these powers for good. At. All. She is not sensitive, she is manipulative. She is not trampling across your boundaries the way you expect from MIL, but she is NOT respecting them all the same.
Just because she's burrowing under your wall or conning her way through the gate instead of bursting through in a tank doesn't mean she's any less dangerous. If anything, her tactics are more dangerous.
With your MIL, you have troops with guns raining fire on her the moment the breach happens. With SMIL? Once she's past the border, she's basically free to do as she pleases unless you shut her down.
ahtttler writes:
Perhaps you can tell her that none of the children will be spending the night away from home for several years. It's unfortunate she set up a nursery without consulting you as you would've been able to stop her from spending money on unnecessary furnishings for your child(ren).
"The baby won't be spending a night away from me for years to come. So please stop hinting around about it. Your constant references to DD as being your baby, your darling girl, god's gift from heaven to you are quite unsettling to me and frankly, they remind me of a very bad baby snatching TV movie."
"MiL, I have to get this off my chest and into the open. These comments you make give me the absolute creeps. You have to stop making them. Please. This is my child. I'm the mother. I make the rules concerning my child.
Crying about them will not get your way. It's unfortunate you feel so emotional about this/her, but my child is not your chance to mother. You are a darling woman, but on this one thing I remain firm.
My baby is not a consolation baby. If you cannot understand the reasons I am having this discussion with you, perhaps speaking with a therapist will help you through the overwhelming emotions you are feeling towards my daughter.
All I know is you are making me extremely uncomfortable, and in turn, I find myself hesitant to be around you with the baby. I know that's not something you want to hear, but you need to hear."
Update 1 (some stuff has gone down):
So I was going to wait until Friday when SMIL, FIL, BIL his wife and kids come over. My naive self thinking this was a 'take her to the side for a 5 minute chat situation'. But you guys scared the F out of me (more like the sense into me) with your comments so I had to get my ducks in a row IMMEDIATELY .
Now I have to say the stories of this sub, some of which you've brought to my attention, (also s/o to the person who linked the trailer to 'The Hand That Rocks the Cradle'.
The singular most terrifying movie clip I've seen as a mother) is so out of my spectrum and everything I know it was hard to adjust to let alone coming to the realisation this could be my situation. Ok I'll give you a run down of last night's events:
As soon as I saw my DH in the evening I burst out crying. He just looked at me shocked because I rarely cry so even if he didn't think the SMIL situation was bad before he knew it must be to be making me feel this way.
I begun by telling him everything. He would notice and I would occasionally tell him when I was at the brink of ripping my hair out the SMIL would do but never in full details (mainly because when I see my DH I want to have real conversation with him). It was like word vomit.
I told him about the pet names, the constant holding, the running to get her before me, the clothes, all the shit through my pregnancy, the nursery, the constant whispering in DD ear of god knows what, the photo album of DD (she takes pictures CONSTANTLY and has already filled out a massive photo album, she has more photos than me.)
The sad statements, the looks!! F I forgot to mention the LOOKS in my first post! When I'm holding my daughter she would just give me the weirdest look, it's like a combination of sadness, creepy, anger, confusion.
I finished by reading him a few of your comments. I highlighted what a lot of you guys said, that SMIL didn't properly address or handle her grief and it has manifested into an obsession with my daughter.
Her unhealthy attachment to DD is not only damaging to my DD, and DS who will grow up noticing the different attention they get by her (everyone else treats them the same) but her own mental health.
I made it clear I do genuinely have love for SMIL but I'm scared with this unhealthy attachment and it's more serious than we both previously thought, I need both of us to talk to SMIL and FIL because I'm scared about how this could end. He just sat there and listened to everything I said and read.
The first thing he did was hug me and for someone who doesn't cry, lord I think I cried for England in that moment. He began by saying he always knew she hadn't processed her grief properly and told me a few off instances when he was a teenager.
He said first things first my dad has to realise that his wife is his primary concern and she needs help and DH's primary concern is me and the kids and his dad needs to respect that.
He said we should talk to them together because his dad will most likely try to shut it down if he just speaks to his dad separately.
We had a whole plan to start off from a point of concern rather than attack slowly branching into our issues, outlining our rules and boundaries clearly and firmly that we're not to be overridden, manipulated, influenced or stomped over.
Any breach of our boundaries would indicate that SMIL doesn't respect our role as DD/DS parents and as individuals.
And with all violations there are repercussions.
Then coming back to concern addressing her mental health, her processing her grief, (Best friend, who is like a sister to me and is in the loop bc we're very close, went through her own miscarriage a few years ago and went to therapy and gave me the contact info of her therapist) we would be there for her emotionally as well.
I made it clear to my DH that even if she agrees to respect our boundaries and acknowledges all the indirect ways she doesn't abide by them I still want her to go to therapy because those issues won't go away and...
if she can't inflict them onto DD she will only internalise them and in turn cause herself more inner conflict and I am genuinely concerned about her mental health. DH agreed and said we'll outline that to be a necessity.
We had notes, we were on the same page, the kids were sleeping, I had calmed down. Great. I got a text from MIL saying can she and FIL come round tomorrow (today) for dinner instead because Friday they have a meeting for some event thing at their church.
Great! My anxiety ridden mind can face this quicker and won't have to be drawn out until the end of the week. Everything was set. I had DH's full support and he'd be addressing everything with me, my SMIL is a rational woman what could go wrong? The shit storm that was today shouts back 'EVERYTHING!'.
Update 2 (something insane happened a few hours ago):
I just want to start off by saying this happened a few hours ago so I'm still pretty overwhelmed. I know you guys are used to the craziness of MILs but this level is still very much still new to me so I'm still in a bit of shock so please forgive me for any mistakes/errors etc.
As I was getting ready in the morning my hands were a little shaky. I think this was my body was warning me s was going to go down. The whole day at work the day dragged blah but let's get to the point. SMIL and FIL live a 30 minute drive away and they're always on time.
I picked up the kids from the childminder I settled them down, DH comes home. I start to prep dinner, everything was set. We were planning to have the talk after dinner when the kids went down just to make life easier.
The door rings, DH gets it, they come in greet everyone. SMIL spots DD in my arms and makes a beeline towards me and puts her arms out 'My darrrrrrlingggg you're getting SO big! Come to nana!' I just looked at her and said actually can you help me in the kitchen and handed my kid to DH.
She looked a little taken back but she still came along and helped me out. It was dinner time, we're eating, she spends the dinner fussing and cooing and generally devoting her time to DD who is just making a mess.
Me: SMIL your food is getting cold ,SMIL: it's fine! baby voice my princess is being a little fussy she needs some attention don't you!
Me: she could care less about you right now she's enjoying her food, you should too.
SMIL: nonsense! (Starts eating her food anyway)
Shortly after kids get put to bed despite protests from SMIL. I come down to her talking to DH and FIL saying 'Panther seems very short today. Is she ok?'. I walk up and answer before DH, 'Actually SMIL we've been meaning to speak to you.'
All colour from her face disappeared it was the creepiest shit. I was a bit taken back but I continued. I sat next to DH, so we were sat across from SMIL and FIL.
Me: I hope you don't take this as an attack as we're greatly concerned about this situation. Since DD has come along we've noticed you have changed from warm and loving grandmother to DS to adopting a direct mother role with DD. We want to make it clear so there's no confusion, we're DD parents and that...
SMIL: weeping commences (right on cue); Me: Hands over tissue I'll continue... We have a clear set of boundaries that you have continually crossed, most likely unintentionally but crossed nevertheless so we want to redefine them so there is no further confusion:
I am DD's mother, when she cries and I am 2 feet away from her, I don't appreciate you rushing pass me to pick her up. Sometimes let her cry it out if don't go to pick her up.
DD isn't yours weeping louder (FIL looks annoyed, I continue) please stop referring to her as your little girl, your princess or anything relating to that. You're her grandmother, a wonderful one but please understand your role.
The constant photographs. You can enjoy a moment with DD without having to snap a photograph just appreciate the moment. Please stop harassing me for FaceTime sessions when you've just seen her.
SMIL is getting visibly more upset DH: SMIL I can see your getting upset and Dad I know this is an issue for you but you have to realise our primary concern is our children and we are worried about SMIL.
She has developed an unhealthy attachment to DD and she needs to address the underlying issue: her grief. We know this is hard for you but until you do we don't feel comfortable with you being alone with DD...
This is what did it. She was weepy before, FIL was annoyed but holy shit this led to the explosion. She jumped up and shouted 'You can't take her away from me! She's all I have! I love that little girl, I would never do anything that would cause her harm!!! Why are you trying to keep me away from her?
Panther I have done SO much for you! I was the MIL that DH bio mother (MIL) wasn't and this is how you chose to repay me? By taking away my little girl?? I don't have ISSUES! I couldn't have children and GOD HIMSELF blessed me with a family of my own and now you're trying to take her from me.
Runs out of the room shouting DD name. We all just sat there stunned. Never in my life did I think she was even capable of screeching that loud and I don't think FIL did either. I shot up and followed her and ran past her blocking her entry to the stairs. I was shouting for DH, she was weeping.
Lord knows why it was taking them so long. I just pushed SMIL back and said 'you need to leave. Get the f out of my house you're going to wake up my kids with your wailing.' My voice was so firm and oddly unphased even though I was in complete shock.
She looked at me and collapsed grabbing onto my feet BEGGING and still whaling it was hard to understand her. DH and FIL appear and were just as shocked as I felt but they had it written on their faces.
DH walks over to us and un claws her hands from my feet and lifts up her limp body. She grabs DH by his face and weeps 'Please... I'll do whatever you want, I'll listen to your rules please don't take her away from me, she's my little girl.' DH looked at FIL and said 'She needs help, more than what anyone of us can give her.'
FIL finally snaps out of his trance and takes SMIL hand and is trying to calm her down and put her jacket on. She's still weeping as they're opening the door. 'Please, please, please please panther, please'. Is the last thing I hear before they get in the car and drive off.
I run up to check on the kids, they're both fast asleep. I walk back downstairs and just sit on the stairs then DH walks over and sits down next to me, holds my hand and we sit there in silence for the next 5 minutes mentally processing what happened.
I called the childminder to let her know that she can't release the kids to anyone but me or DH because in the past FIL/SMIL have picked up the kids for me before so she's familiar with them.
We already have a security system, cameras and pass codes that only me and DH knows. I also emailed my boss which happens to be my friend to let her know I won't be in tomorrow, I doubt I'm going to get much sleep tonight.
Update 3:
A lot has happened. I wanted to write it up whilst it was still fresh but it kept tumbling into a massive sstorm so I've skipped out on details. You have all been so supportive and provided me with great advice and have checked up on me so I want to thank you all. Apologises for any errors in advance!
Everything was quiet for a few days. We hadn't heard from SMIL or FIL directly but BIL said his dad (FIL) was taking care of the situation which I assumed that meant FIL was taking her to see a professional.
DH texted his Dad that we were glad he was taking the much needed steps to get SMIL professional attention and there was no shame in that, we are concerned for her wellbeing but due to recent events we'll be limiting our contact and there is to be no contact with the children until we see great improvement though visits will still be supervised.
We hope she's getting the help she needs and we wish them luck. He replied 'I understand and thank you.' Cool.
I took time off work because I was a little anxious and we were in the process of hiring a nanny (not new already pre-planned) but apart from the whirlwind that was the breakdown I thought the situation was contained. This is where the narrator in my life says 'She thought wrong.'
I didn't want to leave the house for Mother's Day but DH planned a whole day so we agreed we'll celebrate it. I don't know why, but I felt a little guilty. In the back of my mind I couldn't help think of SMIL who we celebrate every year and she was probably a mess.
So the morning of, I laid out my makeup and went to have a shower. I come back and several products are gone. I assumed it was stress and that I must've forgotten to put it out or misplaced it, so after looking for a while and having not found them I just used different products and my spare brushes.
It was odd, but not unlike me to misplace things so whatever. We leave. DH, the kids and I are all having brunch at a restaurant 15 mins from our house, it was fairly packed. It was a little chillier than I expected so I thought I'd grab a jacket for my kids and by the time I got back the food would have arrived. So off I go.
Now when I pulled up I noticed the door (side door where the recycling bin, outdoor bin etc are but there's a window opening above that, important) was slightly open. It's not a door that has a lock so I assumed the wind must've opened it slightly, but still a little odd.
I went to close the door and I noticed a trash can had fallen over, now this was odd. The wind couldn't have knocked this over, it was full. Now I was a little on edge but I remained calm but cautious.
I went to the front of the house, slowly unlocked the door with my keys, and closed the door behind me. My heart was racing, I was sure I was overreacting but I had a terrible feeling.
I walked up the stairs, walked past my sons room (fuck the jacket), walk up to my daughter's room and the sight I saw horrified me. My daughter's clothes were organised in rows on the floor. Not folded but laid out. Outfits completed with shoes and accessories. There, sitting cross legged on the floor, was SMIL.
All I could say was 'What the f'. This lady got up so fast and sighed like she had been waiting on me. 'Thank god you're here panther! I came to celebrate Mother's Day with the babies. No one was here! I couldn't decide on what outfit to put her in so I laid them out to get a visual.'
I literally thought I was the one going crazy. I took out my phone to call DH and she grabbed my phone and said 'No no we don't have to do that' with the f creepiest grin. Now I was split. My heart was saying f this start swinging but my head was saying 'she's unwell, vulnerable and clearly unstable.
Me: SMIL you need to leave right now. You're not supposed to be here we are NC. SMIL: But it's Mother's Day! It's the day god meant for mothers and children. I should be with my baby.
Me: (I was done) She is not your daughter! I am her mother, she is my daughter. You're not even biologically related to her. I'm done with this shit. snatches phone back.
I started to walk down the stairs to call DH from downstairs and this woman is sobbing behind me. I was so done, a b had run out of patience! I call DH and tell him. He wanted to drive back but I didn't want him to bring back the kids so I said drop them off at SIL house then come.
This woman was screaming over my shoulder 'Panther? Is that DH? Is he bringing DD?! Omg I knew you'd come around. See this was a misunderstanding! Babies are supposed to be with their mothers! starts laughing.
Me: You're delusional. I can never let you be around them. You broke into my house, who does that?! I'm calling the police. SMIL: sobs You can't! We're family! I'm not doing anything wrong! You're trying to keep her from me!
Half of me wanted to beat the sense into her but the other half was so freaked out I thought it would be better for the police to handle this s.
The phone was ringing, as I said hello and turn back around this woman has two kitchen knives each one pointing at her temple. I never felt more powerless and horrified.
She was sobbing that she can't live in this world without her baby. I try to speak calmly and slowly not to scare her but f I'm about to faint of horror. She's screaming and sobbing uncontrollably, saying she can't live in this world no more, it's too painful, too evil. I'm crying now, half because I'm terrified the other half what she is saying is horrible.
I'm begging and pleading with her but I know the only thing that'll get her to put down the knives is my daughter. I tell her she can't do this, how will it affect DD? Without her grandmother here. She needs you. She starts to whimper and drops the knives, I pick them up. The police arrive.
The rest of the day was a bit of a blur. I remember DH , FIL, BIL arriving shortly. I remember screaming at FIL that he was weak and cowardly and that he needs to put her into a hospital where she needs to be psychologically analysed. I felt bad at how I was just screaming at him but that was one of the most terrifying moments I've witnessed.
SMIL went into psychiatric hold and she's still in the hospital right now. Neither myself or DH have visited her but SIL told me for the first day she was screaming 'Just let me die' and crying for DD. It's been a week but I was told she's made improvement.
I don't know how to feel. On one hand I feel our relationship is permanently damaged. I feel guilty because I know she's unwell but a part of me will always feel she's unpredictable and therefore unsafe to be around.
I'm British (if you couldn't tell by my phrases/spellings) but I live in the US (met DH in college, got married and stayed.)
So I don't have any of my own family to lean on here but we have an apartment in another state where my best friend happens to live a 10 minute drive away so me and the kids are going to go for a few weeks. We're also looking to move, this whole thing has been a trial to say the least. Hopefully this is the end of the madness.
Update 4:
Hey guys. I'll give you a rundown of what's been going on. SMIL (a name is overdue, any suggestions?) is out of the hospital. From what I've heard from SIL, her delusions have stopped but she's very depressed at the reality of her life and what's happened. She's now attending therapy.
The restraining order was granted. We spoke to our lawyers and the breaking/entering charges was a lot tricker than we thought and honestly we think she needs mental help more than criminal correction so we decided against it.
We have a complete new security system that covers the whole grounds. New locks, new passwords. This all got changed on the day.
The house got put up for sale. I'm sad about this because it's my dream house but too much has happened that it's ruined it for us. Plus SMIL and FIL live a 20min drive away. Way too close.
Me and the kids are temporarily staying in our apartment in another state, SMIL has never been here neither does she know the address. My friends have been really supportive and my sister has flown over, she's been great. Still, I gave a picture to the doorman of what she looks like just in case.
We finalised our will, we had already been doing this, to ensure FIL and SMIL will never be the guardians of our children.
I just wanted to clear some things up in my last post. I don't feel sorry for her as in oh I'll forgive her, poor her, she's not a threat sorry more that this is an unfortunate situation and it's a shame it had to end in NC. Don't get me wrong, I felt sad initially but not enough to place her needs above mine or my children.
If I'm being completely honest, even with the RO I think she will still come for us. I doubt she cares about legal repercussions. SIL said it took some time but she didn't seem delusional anymore just depressed and that she cries all day that she won't see us for a long time because of what she did.
I can't take the risk of her being around my children knowing what she is capable of. But they will no doubt try to guilt us into seeing them. Especially with the birthdays coming up. Yeah hell will freeze over before that happens.
FIL promised SMIL that when she gets better that of course she'll get to see us. BIL stepped in and said that's not his decision and we've made it clear that SMIL won't be around our children for a long time. She cried.
The flying monkeys have hit us with full force. People from SMIL's church called DH. They were rambling on about how this situation is terrible and we should not abandon her in her time of need etc. He hung up. The Pastor of the church met with DH and he was lovely he said we were taking the right steps to ensure the safety of our children.
We have vacation plans already booked so we'll be out of the county for a few months. Unfortunately we can't move out of the US permanently it isn't the right time for us. But we're definitely moving states. A fresh start is overdue.
To top it off my MIL has returned from her travels in Timbuktu, harassing DH for details and sweeping in trying to adopt the stable parental (lol) and grand parent role (double lol). Great.
Also I never found the missing makeup. I had to repurchase the products which sucks because it's expensive as f.
Update 5:
Hey guys! I've gotten a few messages about an update and frankly you guys have been with me on the start of this whirlwind and have helped me a great deal so here goes an all over the place update!
I can't go into everything because it's draining so I'll give you guys the highlights even so this is likely to be long! I've decided to go with 'Niobe' because the namesake is eerily appropriate. (Thank you littletandme2!)
A month ago SIL Facetimes me. She was at Niobe's house helping her clean and she came across a suitcase. Intrigued, she opened it to find pieces of my clothing, shoes I haven't seen for months, bras, gloves and a bunch of random shit including hair ties and perfume.
When asked about it, Niobe said she used to take things of mine no matter how insignificant. She said she wanted to make things 'more familiar for DD when she was here'.
She asked her about my makeup but she said she couldn't remember if that was something she took which is understandable since she was so out of it that day. So the mystery of the missing makeup is still unsolved but a lot of weirdness nevertheless.
For the first few weeks, FIL bombarded DH with calls/texts. He never picked up. Turns out he would call DH anytime Niobe was having a hard time to convince us to let her have a Facetime session with the kids.
Our children adapted pretty well, after our conversation with DS explaining why they won't be seeing their grandparents he hasn't really asked or struggled not seeing FIL or Niobe.
Niobe is making steady mental progress. She's not delusional anymore but she still has her own issues. I would be pretty proud of her if she wasn't causing me so much shit. Her and her church minions have convinced themselves that my actions are 'far too drastic' and that I'm doing this to be spiteful.
That I used this opportunity to isolate my husband and my children from 'their family'. But this is all to be expected from someone like me. That I think I'm better than them. Literally all things they have said in the presence of my SIL.
They also tried to re-write what happened and have said I exaggerated and manipulated Niobe's unfortunate breakdown into creating my own demented narrative, 'in a matter of weeks she has managed to take my away my son and beloved grandson as well as my beautiful granddaughter.'
Every couple weeks I get calls from people asking me if another rumour is true. Including, but not limited to, I cheated on DH and that I convinced DH to move so he didn't have to live in the same city as my lover and that my leaving was nothing to do with Niobe but my own shortcomings that I have tried to project onto Niobe. Please laugh with me.
When they found out we were moving (inevitable as one of her friends lives near us) they flipped out. Following conversation took place.
Niobe: She's taking this too far. I understand I was in the wrong but to move to another state... wait is she planning on leaving to England?? She can't do that. BIL: Yeah I don't think you have a say in that. Niobe: I am still their grandmother. She can't do that.
We're not planning to move to the UK any time in the near future, if ever. It's just not right for us right now but either way she's not seeing my kids so why would it matter.
Fast forward. This bitch and equally unhinged FIL decided to take a lovely trip to visit London when they were in Europe. Haha. 'We'll go visit the Queen!' F off you psychopaths.
Thanks to everyone being tight lipped, we were in Asia on vacation so she missed us. That didn't stop her from trying to call my sister asking for her address 'to stop by and catch up' my sister gave her a stern talking to and pretty much said I'm not as patient as my sister call me again and we're going to have big problems. We're heading back to the US so I'm sure our return will invite another level of s.
Update 6:
Hey guys! I know an update about Niobe(or 'My SMIL who thinks my daughter is the child she never got to have' as some of you know the saga) is WAY overdue. An update of crazy is pending so I'll write that up and post it sometime this week. But this one is a fairly short one and it's in the title.
So some of you may remember during Niobe's mental breakdown she broke into my house and mysteriously my makeup disappeared too but no one ever spoke about it again. Well a few weeks ago I was in (old state/home) to finalise a few things and attend my good friend's engagement party.
Now Niobe (SMIL) was good friends with said friend's mother but after this all kicked off my friend saw what a mess I was and her mother was the one who told me Niobe was telling people I had an affair and what she claimed was the reason I was moving.
Well friend's mother was disgusted at her lies and cut her off. Niobe however still felt the need to congratulate my friend on her engagement and give her a basket of gifts. So I asked friend what she got. So she went upstairs and grabbed the basket. You guys.
Everything in that basket was a brand new version of everything I had owned that Niobe had stolen. The exact foundation that went missing, the bronzer, the lipstick (all my shades which is crazy because my friend is pale), a lingerie set, hair ties and perfume.
To say we were creeped out is an understatement. I don't know if she did it to f with me or what but I'd say that pretty damning evidence. You know what's funny? That is the least crazy these past two months have been and you guys will soon be roped into the horror movie that is my life soon enough.