Woman stops inviting 'disruptive' and 'socially awkward' friend to work events; AITA?
Inviting a loose cannon of a plus-one to an event with your coworkers and boss can be a recipe for disaster...
So, when a conflicted woman decided to vent to the moral compass of the internet about her friend's behavior at corporate mixers, people everywhere were ready to help deem a verdict.
AITA (Am I the As*hole) for telling a friend why she’s no longer invited to fancy corporate events?
I (30F) regularly get invited to corporate mixers and parties for my job. I can often bring a plus one and since I’m single I’ve asked a friend (Also 30F) to go with me a few times.
The friend is a bit socially awkward and has a way of saying the wrong thing. At our last event a few weeks ago, she did a few things that embarrassed me including going on and on about how great a competitor is to the host (when I brought it up privately, she said she thought the two companies were “more or less the same thing”) and taking advantage of the open bar to the point where I had to help get her home.
This was not the first incident of her acting this way but was the worst. As a result, I have stopped inviting her to anything connected to my job and instead only grab drinks or dinner from time to time.
She has learned that I still go to these things for work through a common friend and asked if she could go to another one since money has been tight and she could use a free night out.
I said it’s not looking good and when she pushed me as to why, I told her the truth: that her behavior at the last event was disruptive. She freaked out and said that I was more interested in “image” and “the corporate ladder” than friendship. AITA?
MORE INFO: She also said it wasn’t fair of me to judge her drinking when she’s only 4’11 and “can’t drink as much as you can without getting drunk” (I am 5’10 but still never have more than two glasses).
Here's what the jury of internet strangers had to say about this drama...
OverRice2524 said:
NTA. I would respond, ' if by saying 'image' and 'corporate ladder' you mean I'd like to keep my job then - yes I am.'
thatteacherbitch said:
NTA, she's more interested in a free night out than you keeping your job.
EarthtoLaurenne said:
NTA. She made the choices that led her to this moment. Her behavior could cost you actual money and affect your job. Do not let someone who obvy doesn’t care ruin your gig. You set a boundary. As a friend, she should respect that. Though, it sounds more like she’s a bad friend.
socworkerbee12345600 said:
NTA. And kudos for being honest with her. It’s your job. So yes, image does matter, especially if you have aspirations to climb the corporate ladder. And since she wants to guilt you about friendship being less important to you than those goals, then let’s flip that.
Obviously friendship is less important to her than having a good time at your expense. So sorry…but not sorry! And also, you’ve been more than willing to continue going out with her, just not at corporate events. NTA.