Woman tells 'quirky' friend the truth: 'she's a BAD guest.' AITA? 'The energy is CHAOS.'
"AITA for telling my friend she’s not 'quirky,' just a bad guest?"
So I (22F) had my friend Claire (not her real name) stay over at my apartment for a weekend. We’ve been close since college, she’s the kind of person who proudly says “I’m not like other girls” and has strong opinions about oat milk. She's fun in small doses. Key word: small.
Anyway, I invited her to stay for two nights since she was in town for a concert. Seemed chill. She shows up with ONE tiny tote bag, a plant (??), and no toothbrush. She immediately kicks off her shoes, socks, and takes over my couch like it’s a personal throne. Fine. Whatever.
I’m flexible. Then she opens MY fridge and says, “You don’t have pickles? What kind of life are you living?” I laughed it off, until she started "quirkily" reorganizing my spice rack by "vibes instead of function" and moved all my books by color. She said it “felt more aesthetically aligned with my energy.” Ma’am, the energy is chaos.
But the real kicker was Sunday morning. I walked into the kitchen and found her using MY toothbrush because “it looked like the one I use at home.” When I called her out (nicely, at first), she just giggled and said, “Don’t be weird, I brush my teeth once a day, it’s not that serious.”
So I lost it. I told her flat out, “You’re not quirky. You’re just a bad guest with boundary issues.” She packed her stuff and left early. Now she’s telling people I was “aggressive” and “weirdly uptight.” Was I too harsh? I honestly tried to be nice about it but like… come on. MY TOOTHBRUSH???
Here's what people had to say to OP:
Turmeric_Ping said:
NTA. Tell your friends you were “weirdly uptight.” about her using your toothbrush.
TheRoadkillRapunzel said:
NTA. I’d have told her you had a cold sore. Make her freak out about using your toothbrush.
NoVisual8264 said:
Oh...that toothbrush? That's what I clean the sink nozzles and grout with...I keep my actual toothbrush in such and such location 😆
different-take4u said:
NTA, in response to anyone that mentions this to you, you might ask them how they would feel if she were using their toothbrush and see what they have to say. Once they know in what way you were being “aggressive and weirdly uptight” they won’t think you are the odd one.
youmustb3jokn said:
Nta. Honestly she sounds like the friend you go to matcha tea with but never a full meal. You invited her over for the ENTIRE WEEKEND. So now you know and you do not invite her over again.
Impossible_Smile4113 said:
The toothbrush, the books... the books I may actually have had to be physically restrained. I have my own dewey system for my books and if she started rearranging, I would probably boot her, literally, out the door. Holy moly. She exhausted me through your post. What an invasive parasite! NTA