Woman tries to 'save' her brother from his wife's obsession with her baby, 'she's acting strange.' AITA?
"AITA for trying to 'save' my brother from his wife’s obsession with my baby?"
I (F28) have a younger brother (M26) who just got married a few months ago. He and his wife, let’s call her “Jessica,” are super excited about starting a family. The thing is, ever since I had my baby three months ago, Jessica has been acting really strange.
Like, she constantly wants to babysit, but it’s not just normal aunt vibes. She’s rearranging my baby’s nursery whenever I leave her alone with the baby, taking tons of pictures of my kid, and even bought a bunch of matching outfits for her and my baby! I get that she’s excited, but it’s starting to feel less like “Auntie love” and more like she’s trying to make my kid her own little doll.
I brought it up to my brother, and he said I’m overreacting, but I can’t shake this weird feeling. So, in a moment of frustration, I told him that I think Jessica is crossing some boundaries and might be a little too obsessed. Now he’s mad at me for “attacking his wife,” and it’s turned into this whole family drama.
AITA for trying to protect my baby from what feels like an unhealthy fixation? I just want to make sure my kid grows up in a healthy environment, not one where they feel like a prop in someone else’s fantasy!
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
Cali_Holly said:
NTA. Now that your concern is said out loud. Start limiting SIL from being with your baby alone. And to rearrange the nursery? That’s plain rude. Best to not argue or debate. Simply say, “It’s MY home. MY nursery. Please stop rearranging my child’s nursery.”
Do not apologize for stating how you feel about SIL over stepping. Absolutely REFUSE to apologize. Tell them to allow you into their home so you can rearrange their living room in return. And that it’s only fair.
chez2202 said:
NTA. But I do have questions. You said that she is rearranging your baby’s nursery whenever you leave her alone with the baby. Why didn’t you tell her the first time that it’s not ok and she shouldn’t be doing it, especially as she is supposed to be watching the baby, not rearranging furniture?
You also said she is taking lots of pictures of your baby. Not unusual for any family member to do this but what is she doing with the pictures? Are they going on SM without your permission? Regarding the matching clothes, where the hell do you buy matching outfits for a 3 month old and a woman in her twenties?
Finally, why are you trying to ‘save’ your brother from his wife rather than trying to save your child from her? There’s a really really simple solution here. Just don’t let her babysit. See? Fixed it.
Scary-Cycle1508 said:
NTA it IS weird. and your brother is an idiot for ignoring it. Don't let her babysit anymore and be honest why. That you're uncomfortable with her behaviour surrounding your baby (put the emphasis on YOUR baby), and her constant overstepping of boundaries (rearranging babys room. all the photos, partner look).
PorchGoose3000 said:
NTA. When my college roommate was a toddler she was kidnapped by one of her aunts who had become obsessed with her. Her family is wild and they banded together to trick the aunt and distract her at the front door while grandpa grabbed my roommate from the back of the house.
Apprehensive_War9612 said:
NTA. It's time to limit her interactions with your baby. And tell her in no uncertain terms she is to never enter the nursery again, assuming you allow her in your home anymore.
WinAccomplished4111 said:
NTA. You need to protect your child. People who get upset because you set a boundary are toxic. It's their responsibility to control their emotions, not yours.