'AITA for suggesting we sell a gold pocket watch my dad left to my son when he died?'
"AITA for suggesting we sell a pocket watch that was left to my son?"
To make a long story short: my (44F) father (73M) passed away earlier this year; he only had two daughters, my sister and I. My sister has three daughters, and I only had one son (16M) until my youngest (6M) son was born.
My father’s will specified that he wanted his male grandson to have his gold pocket watch (a vintage Patek Phillipe that’s worth a fortune). However, he made this will years ago, before I had my second son (so of course he had two grandsons when he died).
I got the watch on my eldest son’s behalf and, as I handed to him, I proposed we find a solution to include my youngest as well. Maybe the watch can belong to both of them. Maybe we could sell it and split the money to go into their college funds.
My son said I shouldn’t propose anything because the watch belongs to him and I’m putting him in a tough spot. I said he should consider that he’s not the only grandson anymore.
My husband (he’s the father of my youngest, not my oldest) said I was an AH to make this proposition and should just drop it. I disagree because I left the decision up to my son and didn't force anything.
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
HUNGWHITEBOI25 said:
YTA Dude…your son’s STEP FATHER doesn’t think the watch should go to HIS BIO CHILD and should belong to YOUR SON…is that not enough evidence that you’re wrong to push this issue?
Yeah it sucks the will wasn’t updated, but that's life, let your eldest son keep the watch, presumably he was also much closer with his grandfather.
wednesdayware said:
YTA. Belongs to the eldest son. Also, who gives an expensive Patek to a teenager? Put it in a safety deposit box until he's older.
atealein said:
YTA your father made the will years ago and said grandson singular. Even your second son’s father agrees with letting your older son keep his inheritance. Your younger son will never know his GF, but your older son had a relationship and memories. Leave 16 alone, you are being unfair to both him and your father’s wishes.
NuGGGzGG said:
YTA. I understand wanting to be 'fair' (your idea of it), but you're ignoring multiple things, primarily your own father's wishes. But beyond that - there is something special about being the first-born.
People can deny it all they want, but birth-rights, etc., all have a custom extending from this concept. Your father gifted his male grandson something special to him - and now you're trying to alter his wish.
ProfPlumDidIt said:
YTA. Your father had 6 years to change the wording if he had wanted to. He didn't. That means he still intended for the watch to go to your eldest. Asking your son to give up something meant for only him is an ahole move. Most likely you got something from your father, too. You want to share with your younger son then share your own sh$t.
AngeloPappas said:
YTA - Your son is right, it's his and you are an ah for putting him in a position to make him feel bad for taking it. Sharing the watch would never work, and selling it is insulting as it was meant to be kept as a family heirloom.