'AITA for getting my ex friend kicked out of our friend group due to my service dog?'
"AITA for getting my ex friend kicked out of our friend group due to my service dog?"
I just want to start by saying I’m pretty sure I’m not the A-hole. But my friend and her family are pretty certain that I am. Please bear with me, I’m just wanting some clarity over this situation to make sure I’m not crazy.
I (24F) have epilepsy. I have a service dog (fully certified) who is trained to help me with my seizures. I have been diagnosed since childhood, and I have had my current dog Bailey for four years. She is the best girl around. (Before Bailey, I had a previous service dog we had to retire due to age… but having a service animal is not new for me). Her being a service dog, she is always with me.
I have a core friend group who hangs out quite often. My one friend; let’s call her Anna) (also 24f) always makes bizarre and almost passive-aggressive comments about Bailey and me? For example, she will say that dogs shouldn’t come to restaurants, I’m inconveniencing people, etc. She doesn’t get that I legitimately need her for my safety. It’s not just for show.
My seizures are regular; for context, I get two different kinds. My 'small ones' are petit Mal seizures. This essentially looks like I’m zoning out and staring into space. Quite often, people who don’t know me wouldn’t even connect this. My 'big ones' are my primary concern; these are focal seizures where I entirely lose consciousness. This can happen several times daily, so I must manage it to the best of my abilities.
Anyways. Our friend Anna wanted to host a games night at her house. When we were there, she lost it on me. She told me it was incredibly disrespectful that I showed up with Bailey without asking for permission first. I can’t just assume people will be happy with a dog always being around. I should have stayed home if I couldn’t handle being out for a few hours without Bailey.
I tried apologizing and pointing out that I assumed she knew I was bringing her since I’d never gone anywhere without her. That set her off more. The guys finally calmed her down, but her 'compromise' was I had to put Bailey in the backyard.
I was an idiot and said fine because I didn’t want to inconvenience anyone more or continue stirring the pot. Bailey went outside, and I returned inside with my friends. I had a seizure, blacking out and smashing my head on the floor. I had to go to the hospital because I hit my head hard.
My friend group handed Anna her a**, calling her hateful, toxic, and jealous b*&^h. She was trying to say that I passed out for attention, and I got my way like always. Long story short, no one wants her around anymore.
Since this happened, she, her sister, and mom have been blowing up my phone, calling me the a**^%le, and demanding I fix this situation, and it’s honestly getting to me, so, AITA?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
YTA…you said fine. You shouldn’t of put yourself in that situation if you knew better. A bit extreme cutting off all contact and kicking her out of the friend group.
archaeologistbarbie says:
NTA. She sounds awful, tbh. Your friend group was right to stick up for you. Her behavior was deplorable.
EleriTMLH says:
OMG, NTA. She caused you to SUFFER A MEDICAL INCIDENT. She had so little regard for your health and wellbeing that she caused you harm. I'd be sending her, her mom, and her sister copies of the hospital bill and then cutting them off completely.
robbyrandall says:
NTA. I hope you are OK after the seizure and also hitting your head. I commend your willingness to compromise that you'd risk getting hurt and then actually getting hurt. I know it's not intentional, but it sure got your point across.
If your 'friend' were a normal person, she would have apologized after the incident, but she doubled down and said you did it essentially on purpose. I think this is where she lost everyone. TBH, this is the least AH story I've read on the OP. The AH (a**hole) is Anna.
Later OP came back with this update:
From what everyone has said I am clearly NTA. Thank you all for your concern and well wishes. Ana and her family have been blocked and I will no longer be in contact with her.
It was also brought up to me by another user that their was a similar post posted a few weeks ago from a hosts perspective. This is NOT the same post. My situation happened really recently (allot more recent than whatever the previous post was) I’m shocked to hear this has happened before, but yeah it’s 💯 not related to ours haha
Finally I’ve had a few comments about my dog being “certified” that I want to clarify. I am not from the US so I’m unsure what your guys process is like, but all I mean is that Bailey has gone through the required testing, training and registration to ensure she is legally aloud to be classified as a service animal :)