'WIBTA if I canceled my friend's family vacation because her brother's GF harassed me?'
"WIBTA if I cancel my friend's family vacation reservation because her brother's girlfriend harassed me?"
Charming-Peach6955 writes:
A few months ago, a good friend of mine asked if she could book a vacation property that my family owns for a family ski trip she was planning. This included her, her husband, her parents, her brother, and his girlfriend. I said of course and let them stay for free too, as I know their family really well.
However, a week ago, I started receiving extremely nasty messages from the brother’s girlfriend. For context, I used to be in a pretty serious relationship with this friend’s brother during undergrad and medical school, though we broke up more than four years ago due to having different life goals.
It was quite amicable on both sides, and while I wouldn’t call us friends, we still wish each other happy birthdays and happy holidays when they come around. Imagine my surprise when I checked my phone after getting off work and saw 15 messages from my ex. They turned out to be from his girlfriend, who was, I guess, messaging me from his phone.
She somehow got the idea that I was joining them on their family vacation and was extremely upset, cussing me out and telling me to stop trying to interfere in her relationship. I was really taken aback, as the only time I met her, she seemed pretty nice, and like I mentioned earlier, I barely talk to my ex.
I simply replied that she had misunderstood, that I was not joining them on their vacation, and that my only connection to their vacation was the fact that my family owned the property they were going to be staying at.
However, she continued to be very rude and accusatory, so I decided to just block my ex’s number. She then started going around and messaging me on other social media platforms, where I also resorted to blocking her. This lasted about a week, and it took me blocking her on basically every site that has a way to message people for it to stop.
This has been a very upsetting situation, and now I don’t want her staying at my family’s property. However, I would also feel very bad messing up and potentially ruining their family vacation plans and punishing everyone when I really only have an issue with the girlfriend.
Here are the top rated reactions to OP's post.
Bonnm42 says:
I think you should go and speak to your friend and her parents. Show them all the messages and things she has been saying. I would than follow it up with “As much as I wanted to let you guys stay at the house, if the GF comes, I won’t be able to.
If she acts this unhinged over a miscommunication, I worry what she will do to my family’s house now that she knows who’s home it is. I don’t want my family to pay because of a problem I’m having with my exs GF. I hope you all can understand.”
apothekryptic says:
Don't cancel the reservation, but explain to your friend what's gone down, and let her know that her brother's girlfriend is absolutely not welcome in your family's rental property. If they want to cancel as a result, then accept it - but put the decision on them. Do it this way, and YWNBTA.
dryadduinath says:
NTA, do not allow this woman on your family’s property and be clear with your friend and their family on why they are no longer welcome. ETA: Show them screenshots, in fact. A whole collection if you can.
Fabulous-Anywhere-22 says:
This is really quite simple. Send an email to your friend and her parents, and your ex if you have their emails. If not, text. Attach screen shots of the texts and other social media comments she has sent to you. The screen shots are critical.
Tell them they are more than welcome to use your family's vacation lodging for free, but she is not welcome. If you learn through sources that she is there, you will charge her with trespassing.