Man's sister has 'irrational fear' of avian flu, he say, then stay the cluck away.
'AITA for telling my sister my chickens aren't leaving?'
I'm a 28F living in a suburb where we're allowed a small number of backyard chickens. I adopted this hobby around two years ago and since then, I've been raising a lively flock of six. They're delightful, quirky, and they supply fresh eggs that I either sell to neighbours or use in my cooking.
My sister (32F), who lives across town, recently went through a divorce. Since then, she's been bringing my niece (3F) over to my place more often as I help her out by babysitting. My niece has taken quite a liking to the chickens; she enjoys feeding them and watching them potter about in the yard. It's turned into a unique way for us to bond.
However, the predicament here involves my sister. She has developed an irrational fear of avian flu. She believes that my chickens are a health risk, causing her anxiety, and she worries that her daughter might contract the disease from them. Despite my attempts to assure her that the chickens are vaccinated, well-cared-for, and pose no risk, her fears persist.
She's been pressuring me to 'dispose of' my chickens, arguing it's for the safety of her child. Her logic revolves around the idea that my niece could catch the flu from them. I have suggested precautions such as ensuring my niece washes her hands after playing with the chickens, but this doesn't assuage her concerns.
While I deeply care for my sister and want my home to be a comfortable space for her and my niece, I feel it's unjust for her to try and dictate my choice of pets.
After several months of back and forth on this, I finally lost my patience and told her, 'My chickens are here to stay. They're an integral part of my life. If you can't handle that, you're not obliged to visit.'
This has led to her refusing to bring my niece over. Even my parents have stepped in, accusing me of prioritizing my chickens over family. I don't wish to damage my family relationships, but I can't agree with my sister's attempt to force me to abandon pets I love and maintain responsibly.
So, Reddit, am I the a**hole for firmly stating that my chickens aren't leaving?
Here were the top rated comments from readers:
Reply to your parents. It's not that I'm choosing my chickens over my family, it's that sister is choosing her irrational fears over our family. They are still welcome here. The only problem is in her head. NTA.
Excellent point. OP hasn’t banned the sister or the niece from visiting. The sister is getting angry about compliance with a rule that she came up with all by herself.
So, your sister wants you to provide free babysitting and also wants to dictate which pets are allowed to be in your home? Typically I’d recommend going off on someone who’s being such a jerk. However, she’s going through something very devastating at the moment, so be polite yet firm instead. NTA.
NTA. Chickens are no risk. Not letting your live be dictated by family is not choosing something over family.
NTA - tell your sister to talk to a qualified medical professional if she doesn't believe you about vaccinated chickens not being a danger to pass on avian flu.
And by qualified medical professional, emphasize to your sister that this means a veterinarian or doctor NOT some YouTube quack.
NTA sounds like “fear of bird flu” is your sister’s way of projecting divorce related stress because it’s something concrete that she can (in theory) control and destroy. You are not putting your chickens over her kid. You are just expecting more rational approach to problems.