Woman names son after her grandfather, even though he begged her not to. AITA?
Respecting your elders can mean different things to different people.
One woman was shocked when her sister wanted to name her son after their grandfather. She wasn't shocked because they weren't close. They both loved their grandfather very much. She was shocked because their grandfather had specifically asked her not to name her son after him. Her son learned this story and picked a new name for himself that no one was happy with.
AITA for telling my sister that grandpa warned her?
When my sister was pregnant with her oldest she told grandpa if baby was a boy, she would name her son Arnold after him.
Grandpa told her not to saddle her son with an old man name and told her to go find something nicer, even if it wasn't an honor for him, because in 78 years he never loved his name and he'd hate to be blamed for another generation being saddled with it.
She was upset. He died before her son was born and she chose to name her son Arnold anyway, saying grandpa was just old and sick and didn't realize how lovely his name is.
Now her son is 17 and will be 18 soon and he despises his first name. It became an even bigger deal to him when he learned the man he was named after also hated his name (another one of our siblings told him when he was complaining about his mom's complaints about him hating his name).
He was like why the f*ck did you name me after someone who hated their own damn name. My sister tried to lie and say he never hated his name. But my nephew knew the truth already.
He told her he had a grandpa name and he hated it, that the name was ugly and not something he wanted to live with for the rest of his life and as soon as he is 18 he will be filing to change his name to the nickname he has used his whole life (not actually his whole life but he was like 4 when he got his nickname).
My sister was crying to me about it. I comforted her. She told me she needed to find a way to change his mind or he'd regret it forever when he realizes being Sky as an adult man will not get him very far and he will see that it's not a real name or something a grown man should need to use on everything.
I told her she can't change how he feels about it though. She told me she doesn't get his hatred for the name. I told her grandpa did warn her, that he would be in his 90s now and he lived almost 80 years hating the name and thinking of it as an old man's name.
She told me that wasn't fair and saying 'I told you so' is pretty. AITA?
Here are the top rated comments from readers:
NTA. Assuming you said all this gently, all you did was remind her of the facts. She chose to disregard the opinion of someone who actually lived with the name, your grandpa, in favour of her own.
But just to be safe, since your goal was to comfort her, when she's in an emotional state like this and saying things like 'I don't understand why...', perhaps ask if she wants your opinion or if she just wants to be comforted 😉
NTA. Whether she liked the name is a completely different matter but your grandpa did tell her not to do it because of him. You are just stating the facts.
NTA. Wow does your sister take responsibility for anything? Or is always someone or something else fault?
NTA. She didn't listen to the person who lived with the name, and it came back to bite her. Trying to lie to her son about him not hating it just makes things worse. She should have made it his middle name if it matters so much. I hate when people give their kids old timie names and expect them to love it.
And then she claims the name is in his honour! My mum hates her first name, never ever used it unless forced. Personally, I think it's a lovely name, one I could see myself calling a kid if I decided to have one, but no way would I then claim that's in her honour, because she hates the name.