Woman's parents take in her boyfriend; his parents threaten to sue. UPDATED
"Daughter's BF's parents threatening to sue us for letting him live with us."
Our daughter (20f) has been dating her BF (19) for about 8 months. Due to problems at home and extremely controlling parents we invited him to stay with us when he had a fight with them. We attempted to mediate for the sake of both of them.
Now his parents are accusing us of 'tortious interference' in a verbal contract they say they have with their son to follow a specific career path. The son says the only thing he agreed to was paying them back the money they borrowed for school. (The loan is in his name.)
We are giving him a place to stay with no expectations. (We don't profit off of it. In any way. We live in Ohio.)
They laughably claimed they were 'serving' us a cease and desist order in a Dunkin Donuts when we were trying to mediate. This consisted of them handing us a printed piece of paper that looks like it came off Google somewhere. No attorney names, etc.
Apparently the mom has tried this tactic with other people and it has been successful. In getting them to back off. Does any of this sound like it could have merit? Any additional steps to take? We are currently waiting to see if they actually serve us with real papers before contacting an attorney.
We are taking the following steps: -Filed change of address. (His drivers license is en route via USPS. His family keeps him from having access to his vital records (birth certificate, social security card, health insurance card).
This was after he opened his own bank account they are not aware of. (His mom has previously taken loans out in his name without his knowledge, and has also been convicted (?) Of tax fraud.
Items if note: -Dad is a heavy drinker and makes bad decisions when drunk. He has a DUI still in process. His son is concerned he could become violent, though we haven't seen him do anything. Both parents are out of work on disability of some sort.
Here were the top rated comments after this initial post:
mattlines98ta
Ignore them.
KimchiAndMayo
Ignore them, but make sure he locks his credit.
Brake_Handle655
FREEZE his credit. He will need it later so much easier to unfreeze than to unlock.
The OP provided a brief update to prove that they were taking readers' comments to heart.
Nikaelena
UPDATE: Thank you all for the reassurance and the recommendations. We have ordered his birth certificate, locked down his credit, and are working on getting things replaced. Change of address was filed, and we are hoping it goes into effect before his drivers license arrives. His new cell phone is en route, and we will be returning his old one.
Thank you again for all your help!
A few weeks later, the OP returned with an update.
Nikaelena
Just an update for everyone on this one. Our daughter's boyfriend has now been living with us for a month. He has locked his credit, has obtained his SS Card, Driver's License, and Birth Certificate. He started a job three weeks ago working full-time making $20/hr.
To me, it's not the greatest job in the world, very heavy physical labor, but he seems to enjoy it, and that's what's important. He got his first paycheck, and was just SO excited to be able to purchase things around the house.
We took him to move the rest of his stuff out. His parents knew we were coming and had strategically moved all their cars so that we couldn't park in their driveway. (Normally they park side by side.
They had parked three cars in a row with about six feet between each, so that no one could park on their property.) We made a point of parking in front of a neighbor's house so they couldn't complain about it, and I could almost see his father stomping his foot like a two year old who didn't get a treat.
Since then, things have been quiet. No suit for 'tortious interference' as the mom had repeated like ten times. They have no leg to stand on, of course, but as someone pointed out, he is now working full time when neither of them are. Thanks again for your help!
Here were the top rated comments from readers after this latest update:
cheeseandbooks
“Paying back the loan” that’s in his name? To his parents? So they want him to pay them for a loan they are definitely NOT making payments on. I hope this kid gets far away from them.
TheBlueNinja0
I'm hoping the BF can prove identity theft and get those loans off his name. Not optimistic about it, just hoping.
snarkaluff
Trying to “serve” someone a phony cease and desist in a f*cking Dunkin Donuts is the most Ohio thing ever.
CatmoCatmo
These people are saints. Most won’t stick their heads out for one of their kid’s SO’s in normal circumstances. This is way beyond normal. Hell it’s even beyond dysfunctional at this point.
I’m glad this
kidadult man had the courage to leave his parents, and found a new family to help him out. Although he’s technically an adult, he’s still a kid.
There’s so much he likely wouldn’t know how to do in regards to the credit report, getting his birth certificate and SSN, and knowing when his parents are tossing around empty threats. Pretty awesome these kind folks love and trust their daughter enough to do all of this for her BF.
Whether the BF and their daughter stay together or not, it seems like he’s found an amazing family of his choosing. Hopefully they can successfully help him navigate his way out of, and work on undoing, a lifetime of abuse.
SnakeJG
I'm so very glad BF is getting away from those people. It seems like their plan was to mooch off of him for the rest of their lives, probably while claiming he owes them for raising him.