Woman pissed to find out GF understands her private conversations in Greek. Asks, AITA?
'AITA for telling my girlfriend she should've told me she spoke my language?'
I (25F) recently started dating my girlfriend (Alexandra 29F) who was a long time acquaintance of mine at work before. We've been together for only 6 months but I've truly never been happier.
I had to go out with my cousin and asked Alex if she wanted to join me. She happily did. I'm originally Greek. So is my cousin. Sometimes we'd slide in a few words. Somewhere in the conversation, Alex started joinin in. It was a moment of shock for me because she never mentioned she spoke Greek before.
I was saying pretty basic things with my cousin then but she'd heard me speak on the phone, curse to myself and never mentioned she spoke it. I didn't say anything then but once I got to my place with Alex, I called her out on it.
She said she speaks multiple languages as a hobby and it was not a big deal. I made her count. There were 13 that she was fluent in.
My point was as my girlfriend she should've told me earlier about this and she heard my conversations around the house and never commented on them (they were mostly about my mom's difficult health situation which she doesn't want to be shared - my mom doesn't even tell my brother, I know because we're have a special mother daughter relationship)
Edit: I only ever talked to my mom in Greek in front of Alexandra and it was mostly in the car while we were both in it. I also explained to her that it is something about her health that she's not comfortable with me sharing. Also my mom can't speak English. AITA?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
OkItem6820 asked:
Info: has your girlfriend ever met or had an opportunity to speak to your mother? Does your mother know about her? Or have the conversations with your mother all been on the phone?
I guess I’m asking, how weird is it that your girlfriend actually could have talked to your mother but didn’t?
Least-Earth-7308 OP responded:
They haven't met because my mom and I live in different states but I have told my mom about her.
holi2005 writes:
Sister, I am a Greek woman myself, and I have to tell you, if I found out that my foreign partner spoke Greek, I'd be the happiest person in the world. The only reason why you'd be unhappy about this is if you wanted free pass to lie to her face about conversations that you're having around her, or just the ability to shit talk about her to your friends/relatives without her understanding.
YTA because it seems that you're angry about the fact that you can no longer shit talk around her rather than the fact that you didn't know about this hobby of hers.
Affectionwo8 writes:
Seriously, 13 languages? That's like a jackpot of hotness.
Crazy_Volume4480 writes:
Yeah, but six months into a relationship? Don't you think that's a little long to go not telling somebody you know exactly what they're saying in your native language? I'm kind of siding with the OP here.
I mean, yeah I would be surprised and happy too, but again six months is a long time not to be told by your GF that she speaks your language (and understands everything you've been talking to your mother about, which is supposed to be for OP's ears only).
aterriblefriend0 writes:
I'd be pretty upset to if I was having conversations they KNEW were private health matters around them, and they failed to mention they understood every word and hadn't excused themselves from the room so as not to listen in and be invasive.
Prodavidmohl writes:
YTA, and she probably assumed you knew already. I mean, you are speaking in a 'foreign' language with your gf right there and didnt bother to translate. So from her point you are either 1) incredibly rude and inconsiderate to your partner or 2) know she at least understands a bit of what youre saying right in front of her.
apparently you never said 'sorry, i was just saying (in Greek) that...' to which she could have answered 'dont worry, im really good in Greek myself'
Least-Earth-7308 OP responded:
I wasn't having the full conversation in Greek. My cousin would use the Greek word sometimes and that was it. I didn't translate for her because she joined in right away.