No one will read you for filth quite like a sibling.
Most healthy sibling relationships are a mix of loud eye-rolls and secret support. So it's hardly surprising when a sibling is the one to call you out the loudest for behaving badly.
He wrote:
AITA for purposely not intervening and letting my little sister cause a minor accident with my car and making her partially cover damages to teach her a lesson about distracted driving?
My (25M) little sister (F18), let's call her Christy, has recently gotten her license. She obviously thinks she’s an incredible driver and can handle a car no matter what. After only 4 months of driving, she has already become one of those girls who put their phone between their thighs to be able to look at messages and access it quickly while driving.
It drives us all insane tbh and I and other family members have talked to her about it multiple times. It goes in one ear and out the other. Yesterday she did it again while driving my car when we were out getting groceries. She had been distracted for almost the whole drive and even continued to look at her phone (after a brief break) when I told her to cut it.
When she was about to roll into a parking spot she probably got a message and looked down at her phone. I noticed that she was about to ram into a lantern and when I was sure she wouldn’t cause damage to other vehicles I decided to just let her run into it instead of intervening. It was a huge shock to her and she just sat there for completely still for like 15 seconds processing what just happened.
It wasn’t until I said “will you learn to leave that f@#king phone alone now?” that she spoke again. The first thing she said was “why didn’t you tell me!?” in an absolutely baffled tone and I told her straight up that I didn’t tell her so she’d learn a lesson.
She was absolutely livid and tried to push all blame onto me for not intervening, but I told her it would have been the same outcome had I not been there and that ultimately she, as a driver, is responsible for not only her but also all passengers safety.
Christy was absolutely gobsmacked that she f&*ked around and found out, even more so when I told her she would have to account for half the damages caused in the accident that the insurance wouldn’t cover. In total that was just shy of 200 bucks (blown out light, bent bumper, and a dent in the hood + a few scratches and the damage to the pole of the lantern).
She went completely wild, but I told her that she’s lucky I’m not making her pay for everything since SHE WAS DRIVING WHILE BEING ON THE PHONE. A few days after the insurance gave me the sum and I told Christy what she owes me, which she paid immediately, she told me that apparently because of this she won’t be able to go on a trip with her friends and that I’m a massive @$$hole.
She also added she would have learned her lesson otherwise too. I personally doubt that she would have and honestly, distracted drivers are the worst. AITA?
Fresh_Process6822 wrote:
NTA. I have to applaud you for being willing to sacrifice your vehicle to help your sister learn a hugely important lesson. The shock and fright, coupled with the very real consequence of being responsible for damages, should resonate with her for a while. I hope she will also reflect on what else might’ve happened—such as if that lantern had been a pedestrian.
The outcome could be far worse and such outcomes are highly likely when you’re a distracted driver. Again, kudos to you. You’re a good brother.
Ohwell_genz wrote:
NTA. Thank GOD it was a lantern in a PARKING lot and not a semi on the highway. Kids need to learn. She seems very shaken (rightfully so) and good that she paid back immediately and is feeling the financial CONSEQUENCE which is $$$$ lost so no trip for her (that's what you get!).
Hopefully, this teaches her a lesson. I guess it wasn't like a life-threatening situation either in the lot where she could have hurt you guys or other people.
aj0457 wrote:
NTA. You and your family have talked to her many times about putting her phone away while she's driving. You asked her to stop with the phone on that car ride. I think it's good for her to learn about consequences. She didn't get to go on a trip because she had to pay for the damages to your car? Sad. Your sister needed a wake-up call. She could have hit another driver or a pedestrian.
4-stars wrote:
NTA. You should have made her pay for everything, since as the driver she was 100% responsible and chose to look at her phone despite you warning her repeatedly. Also if I were in your shoes, I'd never let her drive my car again.
hiddenbutts wrote:
NTA. It was a situation you were aware of, and the consequences were going to be relatively minor. She needs to put the damn phone away and pay attention to the weapon she is navigating on the roads. I hope she learns her lesson, I know far too many people that never learn the lesson until it costs too much (their life or someone else's life).