Man shares TikTok video with sis, she freaks he's been peeing in kitchen sink. AITA?
'AITA for making my brother move out after he told me he uses the sink to pee?'
My brother (27M) recently broke up with his boyfriend that he lived with for a while and asked me if he could stay with me (24F) while he's looking for a new apartment. I agreed and he's been staying for around a month until this happened.
I don't have a huge place myself, so he's been staying in my living room where I have a sofa bed. One thing I noticed is that he doesn't really keep it tidy and often when I come back from work I see a mess which really bothers me because I'd like to come home to a clean place which I do when I live on my own.
The bathroom had also gotten a bit messy and he actually doesn't offer to clean it even though it's mostly a mess he's made (I started noticing piss around the toilet and know for sure it's not me). I mentioned that to him and he apologized and said he'll be more careful and clean it up. But he also added he saw I had thrown out pads implying it was gross (it's a closed trash can).
One day we were hanging out in the living room and he laughed at a TikTok and showed it to me. It was something along the lines of men peeing in sinks or whatever, so I asked him if he does that or if he had done it here to which he laughed and said yes.
I told him that it's disgusting considering it's not his bathroom he's doing it in and that I have probably touched the sink after he had done that. I kind of kept going and told him to stop doing that or start packing his bags.
He said I was overreacting and called me selfish and that he's not dirty and this is not a big deal. He even told our parents that I'm kicking him out because he's messy but he never said he PEED in the sink.
I'm aware that a lot of men might be doing this, but I'm not gonna let it happen in my own bathroom that I clean myself. My parents say I'm being mean and didn't believe me when I said he pees in the sink. So AITA?
EDIT: Just to clarify that he didn't pee in the sink because of an emergency but did it while he was in the bathroom with a working toilet next to him. Didn't pee in the kitchen sink as far as I know. I do have things on my sink (toothbrush, soap etc) that I've already replaced.
He also didn't exclusively pee in the sink, just when he was in a hurry or it's more 'convenient'. I also didn't kick him out straight away after I found out he does it, obviously. He's also not doing it for environmental reasons, saving water or whatever.
I also don't care whether people pee in their sinks or not. I just don't want it in my own house.
Here were the top rated comments from readers:
Absolutely disgusting. He can piss in his parents sink if they don't have a problem with it.
Kick him out to mommy and daddy's. NTA.
NTA. 60+ year old man here. Never heard a man say he does this.
You're kicking him out both because he p*sses in the sink and because he is an inconsiderate slob who has turned your home into a pigsty.
He needed to be considerate of your needs, keep the place clean, and minimize his impact on you. He is TA, you are not.
Oh yes, if your parents think it's okay for him to piss in the sink, let him piss in theirs.
Absolutely agreed . NTA. I have never ever heard about men doing this or thinking it's okay to do this. Infact, once I shared a one bathroom house with my husband and FIL, I found my husband holding his bladder until the bathroom was free instead of relieving in the sink or wherever they felt like animals. Actually, my dog is better trained than your brother.
Also OP, your brother took advantage of the kindness you showed him. He is absolutely the TA as mentioned above. And you are completely right to kick him out.
NTA. I'm 54 and have never even considered peeing in any sink. Maybe I would pee outside if truly desperate. But peeing in the sink is something dudes who think they'll never clean the bathroom do.
Adult men who clean their own bathrooms use the toilet like adults. Also if he's missing the toilet, he should pee sitting down. Or at the very least clean up his own mess.
Also, making the false comparison of the fact that women menstruate to dirty and uncleaned piss outside of the bowl is an immature ad hominem which, if I were you, would have been the sole reason for kicking his dirty ass out.
Men are the absolute worst. And your brother isn't trying to make it better, just trying to blame his failings on you.
NTA; he can go pee in your parents sink. 👋 Toodles.
NTA. It’s your place and you can set rules. Being sanitary is a reasonable rule. As you mentioned, you are probably touching the sink that he did not clean thoroughly. I’ll also add that I don’t pee in the sink. That’s weird.