My parents are divorced. I split my time 50/50 between both houses. My mom has been remarried for a number of years now and has three stepkids. Two boys who are younger and a girl the same age as me.
She and I got along so badly that the custody times were switched so we were not in the house at the same time because we could not get along. It all started with her taking my favorite plush animal without permission and ruining it (the eyes were gone and it got soaked which ruined the color).
When I told her she shouldn't have taken it she made it her mission to take my stuff without asking and rarely had any consequences for it because I was told to share. Some of the stuff was fine but other stuff got ruined too.
When my mom told me that she would still sleep in the room after the change in custody when I wasn't there I knew I did not want the important stuff left at my mom's so I took it all to my dad's with me. I was 12 at the time.
This was only discovered a few weeks ago. Apparently dear old stepsis has been trying to find the goods for years but it was when her dad said I should have a game console there, that was given by my grandparents and they couldn't find it, they realized what I had done.
I was confronted by my mom and her husband and I admitted it. I told them I didn't trust that girl with my stuff and moved it all to safety. My mom asked how stuff is safe when my dad has two stepsons at home.
I said because they're not allowed to go through my stuff and because they're good guys who wouldn't do that. My mom's husband was like what are you saying about my daughter. I told him that he's known for years what we think of each other.
Mom called my grandparents and asked what they thought of the console going to my dad's. They said they were fine with it. At least it was safe.
Mom told me I should have told them my concerns and worked out a better solution than pretty much emptying my room. She also said surely there is stuff I am willing to share. I said not with stepsis.
Mom told me I wasn't being very fair and how are we ever going to have a good sister relationship if we don't trust each other. I told mom we won't, because we're not sisters, we will never be sisters and I don't ever want to be.
My mom and her husband think I'm an AH for doing this so I gotta ask AITA?
NTA at all! You clearly established boundaries and if your stepsister cannot respect them then by all means you are not obligated to keep your stuff there, especially if it was given to you by people who she is not related to. She is TA for sure.
NTA. They let her destroy things without consequence. This is the result.
NTA. They're your belongings and you have a right to protect them from being damaged or 'lost'. If your mother is so concerned about it, she & your stepfather can provide items that are to remain in that room for both of you to use.
Each of you should actually have a locking trunk for personal belongings in the shared room that don't go back and forth and serious consequences if either of you opens the other's footlocker.
NTA you have a right to privacy. They witnessed your interactions to the extent that custody was changed over it and they did nothing. They seem to be forgetting that THEY ARE THE ADULTS HERE, they should act like it and protect you.
The stepsister is obviously vindictive and they haven’t been doing any parenting of her. I’m glad you have a safe private space at your dads where you can comfortably store your belongings.
NTA. Take everything of yours to your dad's. Take a backpack with clothes to your moms each week. Don't leave anything there. She may start trying to destroy your clothes next.