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'AITA for telling everyone exactly why I was not allowed at my cousin's wedding?' UPDATED

'AITA for telling everyone exactly why I was not allowed at my cousin's wedding?' UPDATED


"AITA for telling everyone exactly why I wasn't allowed at my cousins wedding?"

I (20 female) have a cousin (23 female_ who just got married to her boyfriend of about 2 years (21 male). He proposed to her about 4 months ago and they had their wedding 3 days ago. One thing about me and her husband we dated in high school for about 2 years.

We broke up on good terms we just didn’t feel in love with each other anymore and we stayed good friends and then in collage my cousin saw him at a party and then started going out a few months later, I was fine with them being together as I have no romantic feelings for him anymore.

My cousin found out him and I dated in high school because one of our mutual friends was making a joke about how he was moving though our family (I didn’t tell her because we weren’t that close) I thought she might be a little shocked but get over it, oh man I was wrong

And then 2 days before the wedding I asked her what time its on she just looked at me and said “oh sorry girl your not coming” of course I asked her why she just answered “look you’ve but me through enough hurt knowing your in love with my man just be a good cousin for once and stop trying to steal him if I don’t want you at the wedding,

that's because you’ve had an intimate relationship with my future husband just respect that” I felt so hurt because I spent lots of un paid time helping her and I spent my own money on her wedding and now she won’t even let me go? So I got pissed and left then I sent a text to her saying I want my money back.

She said no I said if she doesn’t give me my money back right now then I’m telling everyone why I’m not able to go to her wedding keep in mind I spent hundreds of dollars on her wedding

She still said no I’m not giving it back you can tell them I don’t care. So I did I was pissed and hurt she would do that to me at this point there is one day until the wedding and I posed on Instagram “I let my cousin date my Ex boyfriend, tomorrow is there wedding and I’m not allowed to go because I was with him first 💀” she saw that along with loads of other people from my family they knew it was about her.

The family was super mad with her for that and she came crying to my apartment calling me a no good (beeping ) snake she told me that because I was such an asshole people where dropping out of the wedding I didn’t mean that to happen. AITA?

Ok I got comments about this that made me realised my storytelling is crap so here you go 1) “letting them date”ok I don’t mean it like that I don’t believe I “own” him it’s just I wanted to try make what I did seem justified but is’t not and that was wrong of me. 2) family dropping out : just found out only my parents and siblings left.

HiddenThinks said:

NTA. If she doesn't want to invite you to her wedding, that's her prerogative, However, it's a fucking asshole move to ALSO not return your money after you spent time and money helping her. She deserved what she got.

DelightedLurker said:

NTA. If you wanted him and truly loved him and vice versa, it would have been your wedding. But you guys split years ago with no lingering feelings and no regrets. She has no reason to behave this way.

Majestic_Spread3964 said:

NTA it's her husband's fault for not saying anything while they were dating.

DisneyAddict2021 said:

ESH, but I approve of your level of petty.

No-Victory-1773 said:

NTA- I its totally normal in my opinion to not want you in the wedding. But to allow you to pay for it and not willing to pay you back that's petty

Verdict: NTA/ESH


They canceled the wedding because they “needed sometime to figure it out” well it came out a few weeks ago that cousin was pregnant with another man’s baby and her now Ex shouted at her for a long while and left her. (How he knew was because he said he wanted to wait until marriage to have intimacy) well I no longer think I am the ass I got my closer. The comments on this were lovely and I’m very grateful.

Sources: Reddit
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