'I found a photo of a woman who is not my mom in my dad's wallet.' UPDATED
"I (20F) found a photo of a woman in my dad's (52M) wallet."
I was at visiting my parents this week and my dad was working on his car and asked me to take his wallet and pay for a delivery. I did that but I also noticed a two small pictures. One was of mom and dad (Cute) and another was a woman I have never seen before, both the pictures were really old. She is not related to us as she is from a different ethnic group.
I know it is non of my business and it is probably nothing but it raises so many questions in my mind? My parents are happily married. I don't believe he cheated or is cheating on her, but my mind is going on overdrive thinking about this. This woman cleary means something to him.
On one hand, I think I may be better off not bringing it up but at the same time I feel awkward talking about to him. My mind keeps jumping to awful conclusions and I don't want this to effect us. I am really struggling with this decision.
TL;DR : Found a pic of a woman in dad's wallet. Can't get it out of my mind. It is making things awkward for me.
This is what people had to say to OP:
BingandBong123 said:
If it were me I would just ask him, there is probably an innocent explanation. If you're worried about him denying it, you could take a photo of the picture in his wallet as proof. It's likely just a friend you're not familiar with
OneCrazyCook84 said:
Probably a childhood friend that died or something along those lines.
Waytoloseit said:
One thing you learn as you get older is that your parents are people too.
They are complex, and have parts of their lives that they do not want to share with us. This includes previous loves and people of importance that they never feel like sharing or speaking about out loud.
I am sure your mother knows the picture is there, and even knows the story behind it. Surely, she has handled his wallet many times. Feel free to ask him, and perhaps he will share... I have a feeling there is a special story there.
Six days later, OP shared this update:
I am really grateful for the advice I received. I decided to ask him about it last week when I was over there house. It turned out it was a picture of his Fiancée who had passed away after an accident. He had completed his undergrad and masters in another country, They had met in the first month of college and instantly fallen in love.
They stayed together while they completed their education and He had proposed after he got a good job. She passed away just three weeks after they had gotten engaged. He decided to move back as he wanted to spend time with family.
I would have never guessed this, He has always been a chilled out person, always happy and calm and I can't imagine how he could over come losing someone he planned to build his life with at such a young age. I teared up a little when he was talking about it. which is a bit silly, while he was very calm and collected.
I am a bit guilty for jumping to the worst conclusion quickly and without your advice I would not have had the courage to ask him about it.
TL;DR - It was the pic of my dad's Fiancée who had passed away after an accident.