Woman 'humiliated' by future stepdaughter's 'prank'; fiancé says 'she's just a teen.'

'Can't you take a joke?'
'Where's your sense of humor?'
'You're just too sensitive.'

If you've been told any of these, congrats! You've been gaslit. (There is no prize)

A terribly upset woman came to Reddit for advice, still reeling from a teenage prank that she did not find amusing. Cue the internet telling her that her feelings are... actually valid?

'AITA (Am I the a-hole) for leaving my fiance's birthday after my stepdaughter's prank?'

u/Ornery_Guarantee_625 writes:

So, I got recently engaged to my fiancè Michael. We don't live together but we agreed to move together soon. He has a 16yo daughter. I gotta be honest, she seems quite stubborn and her own dad struggles to get her to listen. I'm not close with her which is something I know I need to work on.

Oof, not a great start.

However, Her pranks make it difficult for me to maintain a good relationship with her. She loves to prank and her prank can be a lot sometimes though there's sometimes some humor there.

I tried to laugh it off everytime she'd prank me, but it's gotten too much lately. My final straw was on her dad's birthday.

I came to spend the day and have celebrstory dinner. My future inlaws and relatives came as well. All went well until dinner. We were about to have dinner and once we walked into the dining table, I was stunned to see my underwear hanging on a hanger in the corner.

My stepdaughter looked at me, smiled and said 'of you forgot these last time you visited and I didn't want you to forget them again so I hung them here!'

Is that... even a prank?

I was absolutely astonished, speechless even. Michael was shocked and my inlaws and other guests INCLUDING Michael's friends were staring at me in awkward silence. I felt so humiliated, especially when some of the men laughed.

Next thing I knew, I yelled at her and was grabbing my stuff about to leave and Michael and his daughter telling me to calm down it was just a prank. I left immediately and turned my phone off.

Michael left many texts and voice messages calling me 'hypersensitive' and claiming I ruined his birthday by walking out over a prank. We argued later and he said his daughter is a teenager and it's what they do so my reaction was over the top and ruined the birthday for him and his family.

I haven't spoken to him in days and he's expecting I visit to apologize for walking out and also yelling at his daughter. AITA (Am I the a-hole)? DID I overreact?

What would you say? Is OP being too sensitive over something trivial, or are these 'pranks' indicative of something worse?

Reddit said NTA (not the a-hole) and offered sympathy for OP's 'hypersensitivity.'

LiliumIam asks:

How is that a prank, when it hurts someone? Also she is old enough to understand better. The stepdaughter will be an adult soon and needs to get a grip. There are consequences for your action and could get into real trouble if she does this to the wrong person. Just today I saw a post where some YouTube prankster got shot. NTA.

LavenderGinFizz says:

If these are the type of 'pranks' she's regularly pulling, the daughter is a bully, not a prankster.

DGinLDO adds:

It was a premeditated move, calculated to inflict the maximum amount of humiliation possible. And the guy blames OP, not his daughter, for “ruining” his birthday.

tosser9212 explains:

This is what your life will be. The daughter treating you poorly and her father telling you you're overreacting. No. Just no.

Putting someone's underwear on display at a family gathering isn't appropriate, and your dude should have responded so. That he's blaming you tells me everything I need. DTMFA (Dump the mother****er already) IMO. And do not apologise, ever, for responding as you have.

Miserable-Problem889 writes:

NTA. Most teenagers do not pull pranks like that against an adult with whom they are not close. And it’s a horribly mean and humiliating thing to do to someone no matter what your relationship is like. She is trying to get you out of her dad’s life. I’d oblige her.

And I’d tell her dad that you aren’t willing to subject yourself to years of being embarrassed and having your feelings hurt with his approval, which is exactly what is happening when he excuses her actions because she’s ‘just a teenager’.

While we wait for an update from OP, what do you think?

Should OP cut off the engagement and get out while she can, or is there room for this teenager to get her act together? And even so, will that fix the Dad/husband problem?