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Aunt tells niece that her mother never wanted children behind mom's back.

Aunt tells niece that her mother never wanted children behind mom's back.


When an aunt and mother made a big mistake, she took to Reddit to find out just how serious... And they did not rule in her favor. Here's the story:

AITA (Am I the A-hole) for telling my niece her mother never wanted children?

Unusual_Monitor_2492 writes:

My (28F) sister (26F) and I are polar opposites when it comes to children, I love them and have always wanted them (mine are 6, 2 and one on the way!) but even as a child my sister didn’t want them.

My niece (9) was conceived in what I can only describe as unfortunate circumstances, my family is pro life…depression hit my sister hard after giving birth, but I can safely say she absolutely adores her daughter.

I myself am not pro life, I’m pro choice. I’d been babysitting for my sister, when my niece told me she didn’t want a baby and I offhandedly said “just like your mother”

Now the way I meant it was her mother didn’t either, but niece didn’t take it that way and I couldn’t comfort or explain it before my sister shows up, sister thinks I’m 100% the AH but the way I see it is she knew how I meant it (I explained) and she could’ve told niece that it meant she also, at the same age, didn’t want children.

I did try to backtrack by explaining to my niece I hadn’t meant it that way, that I’d meant when her mother was that age (although she will eventfully find out) I do believe had my sister gone along with this story my niece would’ve forgotten or at least moved on.

I would’ve told niece “but then your mother changed her mind” but honestly, I didn’t want to make things worse by trying to convince her that everyone should have children… She’s upset, niece is over it but AITA (am I the a-hole)?

What do you think? Was this an innocent mistake or something more nefarious?

Reddit ruled a big ole YTA (you're the a-hole).

TheBloody11 says:

Really? “Just like your mother.” Was the only way you could express that thought? “Your mother didn’t want one either at your age, but she got you and she adores you”. If you were going to open your mouth at all it should have been closer to that. Really though you should have kept your mouth shut, no child wants to hear they weren’t wanted. YTA.

Jazzlike_Humor3340 agrees:

There was no reason, at all, to bring the mother into the conversation. And it is always AH to tell a child that young they are unwanted.

Strange-Army9237 comments:

YTA and if you think she’s over it you are wrong. She’s likely to internalize that forever.

Nightstar95 wonders:

I don’t even get why being prochoice or prolife is relevant here either. That has nothing to do with what she did, I get the impression she’s just using it as an excuse.

Pigdango suggests:

YTA - 'Lots of people have those feelings, and a lot of them change their minds' would have been sufficient if you really felt like you had to have that conversation with your 9 year old niece.

So, there you have it!

There's nothing wrong with wanting or not wanting kids, but there is definitely something wrong with what OP said to a child.

Sources: Reddit
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