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Bridezilla demands brother skip GF's funeral to attend wedding; 'family means nothing.'

Bridezilla demands brother skip GF's funeral to attend wedding; 'family means nothing.'


AITA for telling my brother family means nothing to him, after he said last minute he won't be attending my wedding?

I'm getting married in a week, and this is causing issues between me and my brother 'Jack' (I'm 27 and he's 30 btw). I'm already stressed with all the wedding planning, other family/friends mostly agree with me, but some of them are saying I'm being selfish.

A few years ago Jack went to London for a few months for a degree research program. During that time he met someone, I'll call her Katie. From what he told me they kept in touch after he came back and were planning to meet up again, but then the world went to s**t and none of that happened.

He'd told us about other friends he made during his time in London that he kept in touch with as well, so we didn't think much of this. (And he's always been flirty, so it seemed strange he'd be this serious about a LDR you know?). Katie did come over last year, and me/our family met her a grand total of once in the entire time she was here.

Katie sadly died in a crash recently. He's flying to London for her funeral, which is happening next week. It would be one thing if it was nearby, or even another state, but this is a whole different country that will take days just for travel there and back. He'll be missing my wedding, which he's a groomsman in.

I told Jack gently, I'm sorry for what he's going through and I understand he's upset, but he's willing to miss his own sister's wedding for this. Our mom offered a suggestion, that if he really wants to do this he can attend the wedding and catch a red eye, but he said the flights wouldn't work and he'd miss part of the funeral. He insisted he 'needs' to go and that his 'life is ruined', and started going off at me.

I was upset and replied he can do whatever he wants, but it's obvious family means nothing to him and it's my fault thinking he ever wanted to be a part of it. That didn't go over well and Jack got really mad, I texted him but he didn't reply. Aita?

Here's what people had to say:

Mobile_Prune_3207 writes:

YTA. She was his girlfriend. Your judgement on the relationship doesn't matter. They were in a relationship. They meant something to each other. She could have been 'The One'. He's going to a FUNERAL. Someone DIED. Get over yourself.

Mobile_Prune_3207 writes:

I can't imagine being so entitled. Even her subject line 'last minute' shows how greatly inconvenienced she feels at the fact that a life has been lost.

sparrowhawk75 writes:

It's so frustrating when other people don't consult with brides before getting killed in an accident. How dare the driver of the car not check their calendar before causing a vehicular crash? OP's wedding must be the #1 priority for everyone in the world, and it's just rude of everyone else on the planet to not realize that and plan accordingly.

Alarmed_Jellyfish555 writes:

The lack of empathy is just astounding to me. Being upset and disappointed would be understandable, but only if she kept those thoughts to herself. ...But she had the audacity to try and demand he misses the funeral to attend the wedding and threw a manipulative, cruel tantrum when he insisted on going to his girlfriend's funeral?

If family was so important to OP, why didn't she postpone the wedding to be there at the funeral to support her brother, and ensure he could be at the wedding? YTA

Sources: Reddit
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