Man calls his mom 'selfish' and 'childish' for not accommodating his pregnant wife.
'AITA for putting my pregnant wife ahead of my mom when it is my mom's birthday?'
My wife is currently seven months pregnant and has been having a rough pregnancy. She is also pretty emotional right now, which is to be expected. My mom has a birthday coming up and I wanted to take her to dinner.
My mom loves seafood and picked a restaurant which is about 40 minutes away. My wife is uncomfortable being in the car for long stretches of time, and there isn't much on the menu she could eat as she can't have shellfish.
I explained this to my mom and she said my wife can stay home. I told her my wife is particularly sensitive right now and that would make her feel bad. My mom got annoyed and asked if she really had to pick something else because a grown woman 'couldn't be left home alone.'
I told her the pregnancy isn't forever and please just work with us. She said to forget it. She wants seafood and all of the good seafood restaurants are that far away. I asked her to pick another type of cuisine though (she loves Mexican and hibachi, both of which we have locally), but she yelled at me that her birthday isn't about my wife.
I accused her of being selfish and childish and said my wife comes first, so she hung up. Now everyone is telling me that I am an a**hole, and my wife is in tears as the whole family is mad at her.
Info: My mom's fiancé claims he has a group chat with my sisters to talk sh*t about me.
Comments:
sheramom4 says:
Your mother wants to go to her favorite restaurant on her birthday and eat what she wants. You decided your wife was the priority, your mother's fiance decided his future spouse was his priority and not you or your wife.
Your compromise was all about what your wife would want. Your wife doesn't want to go on a relatively short drive so the restaurant is a no. Your wife doesn't eat seafood so your mom's choice is a no etc.
Seafood restaurants serve fish and typically chicken, pasta and beef dishes as well. Shellfish isn't the only seafood and seafood restaurants don't serve only shellfish or even seafood. He isn't protecting his wife and unborn child by not entering the restaurant.
Craftyhobby says:
Do you plan your wife's birthday based on your mom's availability and preferences? I don't understand why your wife's presence is required at all for your mom's birthday. This isn't a family reunion this is specifically a celebration for your mom. Of course her wants are the priority.
iamnoking says:
Seriously? I would just tell my husband to go enjoy dinner with his Mother, and I would stay home. No big deal. This is so weird. Why can't he go to dinner without his wife? Why does she care so much? My husband and I don't go everywhere together.
MandyVeronica says:
YTA only for trying to control where your mom goes on her birthday.
PsychologicalMonk354 says:
YTA. Being pregnant doesn't mean the world revolves around your wife.