In this AITA post on Reddit, which is exactly what happened on an episode of Friends, a guy asked if he was to embarrass his father-in-law by adding an extra tip.
Here's the relevant clip from Friends:
And here's u/InformationPrimary31's story:
I worked as a server in university and my daughter worked at Starbucks and a local restaurant when she was in school. I know how servers earn their money.
My FIL invited us out for supper for my MIL's birthday. We went to a nice Greek restaurant in his neighborhood. The meal was fantastic and my FIL said it was on him. Cool my kids are well behaved and know not to go crazy on their grandparents' money.
I have known my in-laws for almost twenty years now. I know he doesn't tip. So I always bring cash and tip whenever we dine out with them.
So after the meal as we were leaving I checked the bill and dropped 20% on top of his cash. More or less. I guess he accidentally left too much money once and made a big deal about getting his change because the server came running out with the tip I left.
My FIL knew how he paid and it didn't include a fifty dollar bill. He blew his top. Saying I disrespected him by doing this I was implying that he was cheap after he took out my family to a nice restaurant.
I was just trying to do right by the server. I wasn't trying to be a hero or a jerk. I just know that we took up a table for almost two hours and she deserved a tip. My wife is mad at me for upsetting her father. My daughter gave me a hug and said I was right.
Questions, answers and comments:
I'm pretty sure there was a Friends episode where this happened. NTA. Your FIL is an AH.
InformationPrimary31 from OP:
Yeah. I worked at a TexMex restaurant with a 🌶️ for a logo. Not proud of what I did to regulars who didn't tip.
My mother's husband took us out to the restaurant I worked at and didn't tip. I had to go in the next day and tip out my friend that waited on us.
I hate generalizations. My dad, a 'boomer', always made sure to make a point that tipping was important. Was always 10% for the absolute worst of service, 15% for okay and 20% for a lovely time.
True. My mom is 75 and tips very generously. She never complains about the service, either, even when it's genuinely bad. She'll just say, 'Everyone has bad days.'