Man skips sister's child-free NYE party; gets called 'rude,' 'ahole,' and 'dog hater.'
AITA for skipping New Years Eve at my child free sister's?
Last week I hosted Christmas for my family. I (33M) have a 2 year with my wife. Every year its at my sister, parents, or my house and it rotates every year. One of us hosts Thanksgiving/Christmas/New Years. In the last year my sister, who is vocally child free, got a dog. I love my sister, but we are very much opposites.
When I had my kid it changed our relationship a bit. She tolerates (her words) my son. She has never watched him, i've also never asked. My son is present at all family functions, this annoys my sister.
My sister has turned into your classic dog mom. World revolves around the dog type. I do not own dogs, and really don't want to be around them. I don't want them in my house. Well my sister wanted to bring her dog to Christmas, and I said no.
Its well trained and overall okay for a dog, I just didn't want it at my house, or even my yard. She complied and left it alone but was not happy about and let me know that several times.
The day before New Years Eve, she told me kids weren't welcome at her house. I was taken back by this and asked why. She just said alcohol would be present (we all drink and family friends also come to this party), and just said it wouldn't be appropriate for a 2 year old to be present.
My wife and I had planned to only stay till 10 anyway and then would go home because of our kid. We reconsidered and opted to not go at all and respected my sister's wishes by keeping the kid at home. I let her know a half hour before the party started.
Wife and I treated it like any other night, we didn't even stay up till midnight. By Eleven, I noticed missed calls from her, and didn't answer. Fell asleep while texts started coming in. Calling me an asshole. Calling me a dog hater. Saying it was rude I didn't come to the party.
Said it was bullshit that she got my kid a Christmas present but didn't get her dog anything. The list went on, she was clearly drunk. I tried to call her, she didn't answer and got a text, 'I'm not answering asshole'. So AITA here?
Here's how people judged OP:
somefunmaths writes:
I’m very much a dog person. It’s so normal to me that, if I’m honest, I find it a little odd when someone is really staunchly anti-pet/dog (no offense to OP, just trying to set the stage to deliver this next part).
This is absolutely absurd behavior on the part of OP’s sister. If someone demanded that I get their dog a present and picked a fight over it, I would laugh in their face.
Also, dog sitters and/or boarding exists. Your dog(s) is/are not a human baby and do not need to accompany you to social or family events. OP is very clearly NTA.
oldlady2013 writes:
I am the AH too. A couple of weeks ago my grandson was checking out the stockings I had hanging at the fireplace. I knitted them and did one for every family member but didn‘t have one for our little dog. Grandson was pretty upset with me.
DoorSubstantial2104 writes:
We have been known to get gifts for my SIL’s cats. We jokingly call them our ‘other niece and nephew’ 😂
WatersMoon110 writes:
I get all my friends' and family's pets gifts because I like doing so, but I wouldn't expect others to even want to do the same. I'm just weird, and no one seems to mind too much.
olive_us_here writes:
NTA-I say this as a kid and dog lover. She was testing you and wanted you to protest when she said that her nephew wasn’t welcome. You didn’t take the bait and she ironically threw a toddler sized tantrum.
Good for you and your wife for not arguing, complying, and staying home. The only misstep is that you called her back, should’ve just ignored it. I would leave it alone, this is a her problem not a you problem and no you didn’t need to get her dog a gift. I rolled my eyes at that one. Lol