Family

<h2>AITA for telling my husband to get over himself when he started berating me for not picking up his brother&#39;s son from school?</h2><blockquote> <p>My husband (37) took his nephew (12) in after his dad (my husband&#39;s brother) was diagnosed with cancer. He told me that his nephew would be staying with us til his dad completes his chemo treatment. I agreed although he did not consult me about it first. but I told him that he&#39;ll be his responsibility not mine.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>He asked me to explain why and I told him it&#39;s because 1. He didn&#39;t consult me before taking his nephew in, and 2. I&#39;m not equipped nor experienced in taking care/being committed to child care. I still have to cook and clean obviously. He said it was fine and that he&#39;d be taking care of him on his own.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>The other day he called me in the afternoon saying he was stuck in a 2hr meeting and asked if I could go pick his nephew up from school. I said I was having lunch with mom and discussing family issues. He insisted but I reminded him that he said he&#39;d be taking care of his nephew including school pickup/dropoff.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>I suggested he try to get off work or call some family member to go pick him up. He tried to argue but I hung up.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>I went home at 3 and surprisingly found my husband there. He was angry he started yelling at me calling me selfish and unfeeling. I told him that his lack of management wasn&#39;t my fault. he yelled saying that my lunch with mom could&#39;ve &quot;f**king&quot; waited but I chose to be &quot;f**king petty&quot; just to prove a point.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>I said that wasn&#39;t true and told him to get over himself and stop acting like he was the victim when he put himself in this situation knowing he wouldn&#39;t commit. He yelled that ge was trying to do all he can to help his brother out but it was me who&#39;s playing victim after I refused to help out.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>We argued some more and I ended up going to stay with my mom for the night. He texted me some choice words that&#39;s when I turned my phone off. We&#39;re still arguing about it.</p> </blockquote><p>People saw both sides in the comments:</p><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Jay-Arr10/">Jay-Arr10</a> says:</p><blockquote> <p>YTA. &ldquo;I suggested&hellip; he call some family member to go pick him up&rdquo;. That&rsquo;s exactly what he did. His wife, who should be a partner in the relationship.</p> </blockquote><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Visible-Disaster4006/">Visible-Disaster4006</a> adds:</p><blockquote> <p>100%. This whole post reads like her husband is her annoying roommate and not actually her husband/partner. Seems like a very individualized situation instead of a partnership.</p> </blockquote><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/CreedenceFearwater/">reedenceFearwater</a> says:</p><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>Yea I really don&rsquo;t understand these people posting [things like this]. Are they expecting people to come in here like &ldquo;yea you go girl! You really told him&mdash; that seemingly loyal devoted brother you call a husband&mdash; and that little child too that&rsquo;s suffering through a traumatic time in his life watching his father at his weakest.&rdquo;</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Imagine the <em>audacity</em> of life forcing decisions on family that impact you!!!</p> </blockquote><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/mmwhatchasaiyan/">mmwhatchasaiyan</a> says:</p><blockquote> <p>YTA. Cold, heartless, petty. Also, weird that you&rsquo;re married yet you chose to call this child your &ldquo;<em>husbands nephew</em>&rdquo; and never once do you say &ldquo;<em>our nephew</em>&rdquo; even though you ARE his aunt by marriage.</p> </blockquote><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Evening_Laugh1277/">Evening_Laugh1277</a> says:</p><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>I&rsquo;ll go against the grain NAH. Your husband is taking on the challenge of caring for an already grown kid. He&rsquo;s not the parent but he will have to do some parenting and it makes it way harder that he was just thrown into caring for a school ager.</p> </blockquote><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Snowey212/">Snowey212</a> says:</p><blockquote> <p>NTA your husband made a major decision and didn&#39;t even bother to ask you. The reasons for his decision might not be wrong but how he&#39;s gone about it certainly is. you can&#39;t just drop childcare on someone who&#39;s categorically not up for it.</p> </blockquote><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/HelloFuDog/">HelloFuDog</a> says:</p><blockquote> <p>Omg thank you. This is the most misogynistic post. He wanted to be the primary caregiver for this child but he&rsquo;s a man so not only was he unwilling to sacrifice what all the other primary caregivers sacrifice, he just expected his wife to pick up his slack in a non emergency. Because that&rsquo;s what wives do, right?</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

Man takes in son of brother with cancer; wife says she's not 'equipped' to help.

AITA for telling my husband to get over himself when he started berating me for not picking up his brother&#39;s son from school? My husband (37) took his nephew (12) in after his dad (my husband&#39;s brother) was diagnosed with cancer. He told me that his nephew would be staying with us til his dad completes his chemo treatment. I agreed although he did not consult me about it first. but I told him that he&#39;ll be his responsibility not mine.  He asked me to explain why and I told him it&#39;s because 1. He didn&#39;t consult me before taking his nephew in, and 2. I&#39;m not equipped nor experienced in taking care/being committed to child care. I still have to cook and clean obviously. He said it was fine and that he&#39;d be taking care of him on his own.  The other day he called me in the afternoon saying he was stuck in a 2hr meeting and asked if I could go pick his nephew up from school. I said I was having lunch with mom and discussing family issues. He insisted but I reminded him that he said he&#39;d be taking care of his nephew including school pickup/dropoff.  I suggested he try to get off work or call some family member to go pick him up. He tried to argue but I hung up.  I went home at 3 and surprisingly found my husband there. He was angry he started yelling at me calling me selfish and unfeeling. I told him that his lack of management wasn&#39;t my fault. he yelled saying that my lunch with mom could&#39;ve &quot;f**king&quot; waited but I chose to be &quot;f**king petty&quot; just to prove a point.  I said that wasn&#39;t true and told him to get over himself and stop acting like he was the victim when he put himself in this situation knowing he wouldn&#39;t commit. He yelled that ge was trying to do all he can to help his brother out but it was me who&#39;s playing victim after I refused to help out.  We argued some more and I ended up going to stay with my mom for the night. He texted me some choice words that&#39;s when I turned my phone off. We&#39;re still arguing about it. People saw both sides in the comments:Jay-Arr10 says: YTA. &ldquo;I suggested&hellip; he call some family member to go pick him up&rdquo;. That&rsquo;s exactly what he did. His wife, who should be a partner in the relationship. Visible-Disaster4006 adds: 100%. This whole post reads like her husband is her annoying roommate and not actually her husband/partner. Seems like a very individualized situation instead of a partnership. reedenceFearwater says: Yea I really don&rsquo;t understand these people posting [things like this]. Are they expecting people to come in here like &ldquo;yea you go girl! You really told him&mdash; that seemingly loyal devoted brother you call a husband&mdash; and that little child too that&rsquo;s suffering through a traumatic time in his life watching his father at his weakest.&rdquo;  Imagine the audacity of life forcing decisions on family that impact you!!! mmwhatchasaiyan says: YTA. Cold, heartless, petty. Also, weird that you&rsquo;re married yet you chose to call this child your &ldquo;husbands nephew&rdquo; and never once do you say &ldquo;our nephew&rdquo; even though you ARE his aunt by marriage. Evening_Laugh1277 says: I&rsquo;ll go against the grain NAH. Your husband is taking on the challenge of caring for an already grown kid. He&rsquo;s not the parent but he will have to do some parenting and it makes it way harder that he was just thrown into caring for a school ager. Snowey212 says: NTA your husband made a major decision and didn&#39;t even bother to ask you. The reasons for his decision might not be wrong but how he&#39;s gone about it certainly is. you can&#39;t just drop childcare on someone who&#39;s categorically not up for it. HelloFuDog says: Omg thank you. This is the most misogynistic post. He wanted to be the primary caregiver for this child but he&rsquo;s a man so not only was he unwilling to sacrifice what all the other primary caregivers sacrifice, he just expected his wife to pick up his slack in a non emergency. Because that&rsquo;s what wives do, right? 

AITA for telling my husband to get over himself when he started berating me for not picking up his brother&#39;s son from school?   My husband (37) took his nephew (12) in after his dad (my husband&#39;s brother) was diagnosed with cancer....