Sister tells sibling to keep their books from nephew, they say 'do your job as a mom.'
Few kinds of disagreements require outside perspective more than an adult sibling squabble. No matter how much you love them, siblings have a way of pressing buttons in a way few others can. Luckily, the internet is here - keyboards in hand, ready to lend their ears and opinions for all family-related squabbles
In a popular post on the AITA subreddit, the OP asked if they were wrong for telling their sister to "do her job" after being asked to hide books from their nephew. They wrote:
"AITA for telling my sister 'do your own job' after she asked me to take my books to work so my nephew couldn't get to them?"
My sister, BIL and nephew(12) are staying with me because they have home renovation going on right now. She asked me to put away my murder mystery novels (Hercule Poirot) so that my nephew wouldn't get to them. I put the books in a drawer but my nephew found them one day when he was exploring my desk and the drawers.
I came home from work to find my sister scolding him for reading something she said he's too young for and then she said I should just take all the books with me to work. I just stared at her and told her "If you want to prevent him from reading something, you can do it. But it's your job. You do it yourself."
Brother-in-law said I should have just apologized and agreed to do it so that it would be over instead of aggravating her with my reply.
The internet was fully in OP's corner.
skeletoorr wrote:
NTA. Tell them if they have problems with your home and your items, they can leave. It’s incredibly selfish to behave like that when someone is doing you a favor. Also, 12 is old enough to read Agatha Christie.
CornishSleuth wrote:
NTA. I started reading my mother’s murder mystery books (Kathy Reichs’s books, which are fairly graphic) when I was 8. I loved them. My school did not. They sent a letter home advising my mother to monitor my reading material. She ignored it and told me I could read whatever I liked. Your sister should do as my mother did and allow her son to read your books. He’s 12. He can handle it.
lostinthought1997 wrote:
At 12, I was in grade 7. Most of the people in grade 7 with me were also 12. One of our assigned English texts was "And Then There Were None" by Agatha Christie. It's not a Poirot novel, but it is a mystery. These are books written between 1920 and 1970, so they do contain the prejudices and stereotypes of those time periods, so I can understand why some of those books are problematic
If your sister wants to censor what her child reads, it is up to HER to use her words and explain to him why it is not appropriate for him to read that book. She is a GUEST in your home, she is acting inappropriately, not parenting her child, not teaching him that snooping through stuff is rude & intrusive, and she wants you to do her parenting for her. NTA.
Orchidforever wrote:
NTA The kid was digging through your drawers. It's her responsibility to teach her kid it's wrong to dig through other people's stuff without permission. I don't understand why she's mad at you that her kid found something you put away. She should be more upset and dealing with him going through other people's drawers in their house.
chaingun_samurai wrote:
Yet another example of someone living on the generosity of others and having the temerity to make demands.
"I mean, I suppose I could bring my books to work.. or, and hear me out, now... you can GTFO of my house if you can't be bothered to monitor your kid."
And why is the BiL pretending that it's also not his job to pay attention to where his kid is wandering around? NTA.
Clearly, OP is NTA here, it sounds like her sister needs to step up as a parent.