Family

<h2>'AITA for telling my mom I didn&#39;t like her food?'</h2><blockquote> <p>I live in Denmark, so english is not my first language, sorry for any mistakes.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>So yesterday my mom cooked a noodle meal, that I didn&#39;t like. She knows I don&#39;t like this particular type of meal, as I always tell her, but she told me that this one was diffrent and that I would like it.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Well I ate it and when she asked I said 'better than nothing, but not amazing', after dinner I got some for lunch the next day too (I always get left overs for lunch), and after eating, she said 'not so bad now, eh?', I answered 'Better than nothing', she then asked if I liked it, and I simply answered 'No.'</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>She said something about me being rude and walked away, then was just quiet for a while (unusual since she usually talks A LOT), but I&#39;ve been feeling kinda guilty since then.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>She usually makes really great food, but once in a while she makes it the way she likes it, while knowing I don&#39;t like it, and I think that is fair, as long as it&#39;s not too often, which it isn&#39;t. But my logic has always been, if you don&#39;t want a truthful answer, don&#39;t ask me.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>So, am I the asshole?</p> </blockquote><p>*edits to clarify*</p><blockquote> <p>I don&#39;t mean that only sometimes she cook food that she likes, I mean that sometimes she cooks food that ONLY she likes, usually she cooks food we all like, including her. I&#39;m 16. I always thank her for the food, and I did too this time. When I say direct answer I mean 'No', 'Better than nothing' was an implication.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>I&#39;m not good at cooking and prefer her food. And lastly, I didn&#39;t just TAKE the leftovers, she ASKED me to take it.</p> </blockquote><p>Comments:</p><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/GennyNels/" target="_blank">GennyNels</a> says:</p><blockquote> <p>Oh look, another &ldquo;I&rsquo;m just honest&rdquo; person who uses it as an excuse to be nasty to people.</p> </blockquote><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/FrugFred/" target="_blank">FrugFred</a> OP responded:</p><blockquote> <p>I don&#39;t, I just don&#39;t lie. If my honest answer is nice to hear I will say it, same goes other way around.</p> </blockquote><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/DoorSubstantial2104/" target="_blank">DoorSubstantial2104</a> says:</p><blockquote> <p>Why is &lsquo;I&rsquo;m just honest&rsquo; so often used as an excuse to be rude and inconsiderate? She cooked for you and it was good enough for you to eat twice. Just thank her for the food.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>Edit judgement: YTA.</p> </blockquote><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/FrugFred/" target="_blank">FrugFred</a> OP says:</p><blockquote> <p>I thanked her for her food, I always do, I just answered her questions honestly.</p> </blockquote><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Etoiaster/" target="_blank">Etoiaster</a> says:</p><blockquote> <p>I&rsquo;m Danish and I&rsquo;d take &ldquo;bedre end ingenting&rdquo; as an insult :) I&rsquo;d see it as &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll eat it because there is <em>nothing</em> else&rdquo;.</p> </blockquote><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/FrugFred/" target="_blank">FrugFred</a> OP says:</p><blockquote> <p>I mean yeah that&#39;s what I meant. (not as an insult, but the meaning you described)</p> </blockquote><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/PennykettleDragons/" target="_blank">PennykettleDragons</a> says:</p><blockquote> <p>Personally I feel you should probably avoid the 'well it&#39;s better than nothing' going forward.. perhaps in your family it&#39;s not taken as being rude or ungrateful.. but I can imagine it would be for lots of people. And sometimes honesty CAN be (perceived as being) rude.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>Think about: &#39;do I look great in this&#39; (person wearing what you think is a hideous outfit). 'No'</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Might be &#39;honest&#39; based on your opinion... but really.. Is it being truthfully kind?.. there are definitely ways to be honest AND constructive AND kind Like.. 'I don&#39;t like the outfit / I&#39;m not sure it&#39;s your style.. have you considered xyz.'</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>If you want to be brutally honest it&#39;s your opinion / thought / feelings.. but at least consider giving a reason why you don&#39;t agree or like something.. it helps people understand you better too. Good luck 👍😊</p> </blockquote><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/FrugFred/" target="_blank">FrugFred</a> OP says:</p><blockquote> <p>I see your point, and I agree, it was more of an, I&#39;ve already told her that I don&#39;t like it beforehand, so since she asked me I just didn&#39;t think much of it other than that I didn&#39;t like it, but thank you for your comment, I agree.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Aggressive_Manner111/" target="_blank">Aggressive_Manner111</a> says:</p><blockquote> <p>OP based on your comments you aren&rsquo;t really hearing what people are saying. The words used have just as much power as the inflection of tone when answering questions. You&rsquo;re comments are I didn&rsquo;t mean for her to feel that way which is ok but there are a lot of different ways to express I didn&rsquo;t really like it. The fact you said it twice it probably what hurt her the most.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>I&rsquo;ve used that phrase before as the first response but if I get asked again the person asking is usually looking for clarification on why I said it the first time.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Honesty is never a free pass to being rude, since you are on her posting it is clear you want to learn (hopefully). Words have power and can cut harder than blades at times. Think on your phrasing even if you feel the question is obvious and the person should know the answer. Soft YTA</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/FrugFred/" target="_blank">FrugFred</a> OP responded:</p><blockquote> <p>Thank you, this is a very good reply, explains it a lot clearer than everyone else :)</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

Teen asks if she was wrong to be honest and tell mom she didn't like meal she cooked.

Amy Goldberg

'AITA for telling my mom I didn&#39;t like her food?' I live in Denmark, so english is not my first language, sorry for any mistakes.  So yesterday my mom cooked a noodle meal, that I didn&#39;t like. She knows I don&#39;t like this particular type of meal, as I always tell her, but she told me that this one was diffrent and that I would like it.  Well I ate it and when she asked I said 'better than nothing, but not amazing', after dinner I got some for lunch the next day too (I always get left overs for lunch), and after eating, she said 'not so bad now, eh?', I answered 'Better than nothing', she then asked if I liked it, and I simply answered 'No.'  She said something about me being rude and walked away, then was just quiet for a while (unusual since she usually talks A LOT), but I&#39;ve been feeling kinda guilty since then.  She usually makes really great food, but once in a while she makes it the way she likes it, while knowing I don&#39;t like it, and I think that is fair, as long as it&#39;s not too often, which it isn&#39;t. But my logic has always been, if you don&#39;t want a truthful answer, don&#39;t ask me.  So, am I the asshole? *edits to clarify* I don&#39;t mean that only sometimes she cook food that she likes, I mean that sometimes she cooks food that ONLY she likes, usually she cooks food we all like, including her. I&#39;m 16. I always thank her for the food, and I did too this time. When I say direct answer I mean 'No', 'Better than nothing' was an implication.  I&#39;m not good at cooking and prefer her food. And lastly, I didn&#39;t just TAKE the leftovers, she ASKED me to take it. Comments:GennyNels says: Oh look, another &ldquo;I&rsquo;m just honest&rdquo; person who uses it as an excuse to be nasty to people. FrugFred OP responded: I don&#39;t, I just don&#39;t lie. If my honest answer is nice to hear I will say it, same goes other way around. DoorSubstantial2104 says: Why is &lsquo;I&rsquo;m just honest&rsquo; so often used as an excuse to be rude and inconsiderate? She cooked for you and it was good enough for you to eat twice. Just thank her for the food.  Edit judgement: YTA. FrugFred OP says: I thanked her for her food, I always do, I just answered her questions honestly. Etoiaster says: I&rsquo;m Danish and I&rsquo;d take &ldquo;bedre end ingenting&rdquo; as an insult :) I&rsquo;d see it as &ldquo;I&rsquo;ll eat it because there is nothing else&rdquo;. FrugFred OP says: I mean yeah that&#39;s what I meant. (not as an insult, but the meaning you described) PennykettleDragons says: Personally I feel you should probably avoid the 'well it&#39;s better than nothing' going forward.. perhaps in your family it&#39;s not taken as being rude or ungrateful.. but I can imagine it would be for lots of people. And sometimes honesty CAN be (perceived as being) rude.  Think about: &#39;do I look great in this&#39; (person wearing what you think is a hideous outfit). 'No'  Might be &#39;honest&#39; based on your opinion... but really.. Is it being truthfully kind?.. there are definitely ways to be honest AND constructive AND kind Like.. 'I don&#39;t like the outfit / I&#39;m not sure it&#39;s your style.. have you considered xyz.'  If you want to be brutally honest it&#39;s your opinion / thought / feelings.. but at least consider giving a reason why you don&#39;t agree or like something.. it helps people understand you better too. Good luck 👍😊 FrugFred OP says: I see your point, and I agree, it was more of an, I&#39;ve already told her that I don&#39;t like it beforehand, so since she asked me I just didn&#39;t think much of it other than that I didn&#39;t like it, but thank you for your comment, I agree. Aggressive_Manner111 says: OP based on your comments you aren&rsquo;t really hearing what people are saying. The words used have just as much power as the inflection of tone when answering questions. You&rsquo;re comments are I didn&rsquo;t mean for her to feel that way which is ok but there are a lot of different ways to express I didn&rsquo;t really like it. The fact you said it twice it probably what hurt her the most.  I&rsquo;ve used that phrase before as the first response but if I get asked again the person asking is usually looking for clarification on why I said it the first time.  Honesty is never a free pass to being rude, since you are on her posting it is clear you want to learn (hopefully). Words have power and can cut harder than blades at times. Think on your phrasing even if you feel the question is obvious and the person should know the answer. Soft YTA FrugFred OP responded: Thank you, this is a very good reply, explains it a lot clearer than everyone else :) 

'AITA for telling my mom I didn&#39;t like her food?'   I live in Denmark, so english is not my first language, sorry for any mistakes.    So yesterday my mom cooked a noodle meal, that I didn&#39;t like. She knows I don&#39;t like this...