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'Blonde, not brunette' teen ruins her hair; 'screams' at parents who try to help.

'Blonde, not brunette' teen ruins her hair; 'screams' at parents who try to help.


Being a teenager isn't easy, but neither is raising one.

A parent came to Reddit for advice on how to deal with an emergency that many of us have been through.

'AITA (Am I the A-hole)? Daughter dyed her hair badly and refuses to go to school.'

u/painful_butterflies writes:

Can't believe this is happening but here we go. Daughter (14) has always been naturally blond, however the last few months brown hair has been coming through her roots.

She has asked us if she can dye it earlier this month. We said yes, but only if it's done professionally - an appointment is booked for 8th February, very popular salon with good reputation, meaning long wait times but if its being done its being done right.

Reason for this is both her, her sister and my wife have very sensitive scalps, last time older daughter used an at home kit it went badly wrong... doctors kind of wrong.

Youngest daughter was happy with this and agreed to wait, but this weekend went out with her friend and bought an at home kit, dying her hair at her friend's house without any adult assistance. Well, now it's orange.

We offered to buy a brown or black kit to cover it until her appointment, but she screamed she is a blonde, not brunette and hasn't really left her room since.

She is refusing to go to school until WE 'fix it'. I said I don't have a magic hair fixing spell, and the choice is go dark for 3 weeks or put up with the orange colour, we phoned the salon but they cannot move up the appointment, but will contact in case of a cancellation.

So reddit AITA (am I the a-hole) for sending my daughter to school with self inflicted orange hair?

Later, OP added:

We have tried at other salons aswell, however they have similar wait times. One can fit us in earlier but honestly their Google reviews are a very mixed bag- 2 stars out of 5 so we're not overly confident with that one.

What do you think? Was OP being overly harsh, or should the daughter be allowed to stay home from school?

Reddit ruled NTA (not the a-hole) and gave OP some sage advice.

Propriate says:

NTA and your daughter just learned an important lesson about instant gratification: it's not always gratifying ;)

naturaldroid comments:

A Hair Incident is also a bit of a rite of passage for teenage girls. Whether it’s dye, bleach, cutting, or texture - we’ve all been there. A tone correcting shampoo and a repairing treatment (like Olaplex or K18) will go a long way to help fix it.

This doesn’t sound like a huge deal but since no one in the house is particularly knowledgeable about how these chemicals work, I’d definitely just baby it until you can get into the salon. Bring a picture of the box she used and make sure she can describe exactly what she did/has been doing so the stylist can treat correctly!

mouskaka writes:

Lol so she had everything set up for her to get it done yet she was impatient, gave in and dyed it on her own? NTA your daughter f*cked up.

R3dmund lays it all out:

NTA. You made her the appointment. Her impatience caused her situation. This is a good learning experience for her: accountability. If you make a mistake it’s on you to fix it, no one else. Also, reinforce the medical condition issue your other daughter faced. You can also tell her that children with blonde hair, me included, can and might grow darker hair later in life.

So, there you have it!

Looks like OP wasn't the a-hole here, and they actually learned a lot from this thread! Here's an update they gave us:

Final edit: wife sourced silver shampoo so will be doing this shortly. Daughter emerged from her room. Apologising to us for the tantrum which we accepted and apologising for ruining her hair. We laughed, and said its her hair, not ours so she should apologise to herself. So she grabbed a mirror, stroked her hair and said a heartfelt sorry. So all seems to be right in the world again.

Sources: Reddit
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