Woman threatens to call the cops on mom and sister for stealing her car - WIBTA?

A person's first car gives a sense of independence few other milestones can match. But should someone give up this newfound freedom to help out a loved one? Is a car something that someone should be allowed to 'borrow' for months?

u/EncryPtion29 recently got her first car but was asked to give it up to her car-less sister who was going through a divorce and needed a car. Even though OP repeatedly said 'no', she woke up one morning to find her mother had taken the car without her permission. She went to Reddit to ask:

WIBTA (would I be the a-hole) for reporting my mom and sister for 'stealing' my car?

u/EncryPtion29 writes:

I 24(m) live with my mom in a rural part of the USA. For context when it comes to my sister(37), she is much older and we come from different fathers, and both grew up in split custody arrangements.

We are not particularly close, almost acquaintances moreso than siblings. I dont really feel any familial connection even though I love her, I dont feel obligated to bend backward for her.

Well sister lives 2 hours away (in a much more urban area) and is currently going through a divorce. Her and her ex-husband only had one vehicle and it belongs to the ex-husband, so when they split, he took the car. Sister has 4 daughters and works a full time job, I on the other hand work from home and have no real external responsibilities.

My mom came to me asking if my sister could borrow my car for a couple of months until the divorce is finalized so she has a way of transporting her and her kids to wherever they need to be without the financial burden of purchasing another car, or relying exclusively on ridesharing.

I just recently bought my car('12 V8 Mustang), and its my first vehicle ever, i didnt get a hand-me-down, or get one as a present when I turned 16 or 18, I was basically immobile except occasionally being allowed to drive my moms car, or when my dad had me I could get ubers.

Getting my own vehicle was extremely liberating (minus the loan), and I don't feel trapped at home, so when I was approached with this proposal I flat out said no.

I can totally understand the justification for letting her use my car for a couple months, but aside from the fact I dont want to lose my newfound sense of freedom, I also just dont want someone else driving my car, and maybe thats selfish of me.

Over the last few days my mom and sister have been trying to convince me to let her use the car, saying that she would pay for the car payment while she has the car, or that she'd pay for insurance if she has it longer than anticipated. No matter what they brought to the table, I kept saying no. Much to their dissatisfaction.

Fast forward to this morning, I realize that my mom isn't home. I opened our garage to see that her car was still there, but mine was not. I immediately know what has happened and call my mom about the situation.

She just tries to calm me down and have me try to picture it from my sisters point of view, but I'm just flushed with rage and instead just tell her that I'm going to report the vehicle as stolen instead. She just hung up the phone.

As of now i presume my car is down with my sister, and i am seriously considering reporting it stolen and naming her and my sister as perpetrator and conspirator.

I really don't want it to go that far, and I hope that we could instead work this out. But what I initially said as an angry threat, I'm starting to really consider as an option. I just dont know if its worth burning so many bridges over a car, but the fact that my family wont respect my boundaries or my property is so frustrating. WIBTA (would I be the a-hole)?

OP is within her rights to report the car 'stolen'. But should she?

Here's the advice she received from Reddit users:

RageTiger writes:

NTA (not the a-hole). Report it stolen, you told your mother NO. She should have accepted that. Plus she has her own car, why does your sister need to drive YOUR car, when mom's can fill the job?

National-Put-9722 says:

NTA. They stole it without your permission report them. what happens if she was to get drunk and drive that’s on your insurance. I had this happen when I bought my first motorcycle and those aren’t toys. my brother stole it and I reported it missing when I found out who it was i didn’t care that’s your property if they have a problem your mom has a car why can’t she give her car up?

TooCool_TooFool writes:

NTA. You know your mother took it, but you can't prove your sister knows its stolen. File a police report, your mother stole your car and you think she brought it to your sister's. She clearly doesn't care about your opinion on the matter, you won't convince her to bring it back. And the longer you wait, the more convincing her inevitable lie that you gave permission will become.

Jacintaleishman says:

It’s not less of a crime because you know the thief.

Eventually, OP responded with second thoughts:

Maybe reporting it missing instead of stolen would be a better avenue here. I really dont want my family facing fines or jail time. So maybe i could play coy and pretend I dont know what happened to my car, while still alerting the authorities to the situation and have them retrieve it. Who knows what would happen when they find it at my sisters apartment. Seems like a bridge i could cross when i got there.

Reddit users want OP to call the cops; it looks like she's going with a softer approach.

Reddit users had a lot of sound advice on liability and potential costs OP could incure. Perhaps reporting it 'missing' instead will give OP the time she needs to figure out the best way to handle this situation.