Woman crashes BIL's car she took without permission; wife says 'get over it.' AITA?
"AITA For Telling My Husband To Get Over My Sister Getting Into An Accident in His Car?"
A couple years back, my (36f) sister (31f) lived with us. In this specific case, she was running late to work and her car was in the shop at the time. She begged my husband (37m) to use his car but he kept denying her and telling her she's too inexperienced (she had been driving for a year and a half at the time).
Well she was in a rush and she made the not-so-great decision and took his car without his consent. My husband rushed out of the door as soon as he heard the engine start but he was too late. Well like I said, my sis was in a rush and ran a red light, causing her to get in an an accident.
She apologized profusely and I barely convinced my husband to not press charges and/or take her to court. The total cost amounted to $15,000 in damages they my husband has to pay for out of pocket.
Anyways, let's get to the actual situation. We host family reunions every year at our house where both sides of our family come over to just party and catch up. My sister came (obviously) and it was pretty awkward when they were around each other.
I was talking to my husband and sis about investing and when my sister chimed in about buying some apartment rooms or houses to rent out. My husband then just came in and said "Lets hope you don't cause 15k and damages this time." My sister just got up and left after that.
I bought my husband into the living room inside and told him he needed to get over whatever bs he's holding on to and I reminded him that accident happened almost 4 years ago. He then said "Ok so right know I'll throw your shit in the trash, and in 2027 if you're still mad, I'll bring up this exact conversation.
Since then, I've kind of been giving him the cold shoulder and have been ignoring any requests to talk it out in a civil manner. AITA?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
One-Confidence-6858 says:
It would cost him too much money to get rid of you. You already cost him 15K and think it’s no big deal.
AdeptIdea5644 OP responded:
The dude is an orthopedic surgeon. That's why I think he should get over 15k. 15k is 2.7% of the average orthopedic surgeon salary in our state. lmao
Mobile_Prune_3207 says:
YTA. He had to pay for damages after she stole his car. She committed a literal crime and he had to literally paid for it. Did she even pay him back? That's a lot of money to fork out, never mind the loss of trust and the relationship being tarnished by her stealing the car.
AdeptIdea5644 OP responded:
She hasn't paid him back yet
Kev_bow24 says:
YTA. She stole his car, he has every right to still be pissed .
_iAbigail says:
If it were me I would have pressed charges. Idgaf. Either she pays every f%$&@ng penny and then some or she’s being taken to court. Idc. Either way she’d never be allowed in my house or on my property again regardless. What kind of trash family does that
CivilButterfly2844 says:
YTA. She didn’t crash his car a couple years ago and he’s still mad. She STOLE his car. RAN A RED LIGHT. Caused $15,000 with of damages. And STUCK HIM WITH THE BILL. Now she’s talking about investing and such without any mention of perhaps PAYING BACK THE DAMAGES SHE OWES?!?! She’s made no attempt to reconcile/pay restitution.
He agreed to not press charges or take her to court over the damages at YOUR insistence. And now you tell him he needs to just get over it, when he suggests you might not just get over it if some of your stuff is destroyed you give him the cold shoulder (pretty much PROVING HIS POINT), and you’re NOT sure that you’re the asshole?!?! Let me help you out…you are. You are the asshole. As is your sister.
ichijiro says:
So stealing is ok. So you are gold Digger? And you like to enable Bad behaviour? Please don't have Kids.
AdeptIdea5644 OP responded:
We do have kids. 3 actually, and I'd appreciate you not bringing up my children.
ichijiro says:
YTA. You are defending traitor, liar, fraud, thief. I would divorce you. Your husband should divorce you. You don't deserve him.
AdeptIdea5644 OP responded:
Says who?