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Woman calls sister 'selfish' and 'cruel' for announcing pregnancy at parents.

Woman calls sister 'selfish' and 'cruel' for announcing pregnancy at parents.

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'AITA for calling my sister selfish for announcing her pregnancy at our parents house?'

My husband and I have been having a long struggle with infertility. We have been getting treated and trying for a baby since 2017. But nothing worked! My husband is understandably devastated as he'd always wanted kids but never got the chance to be a father.

He's super sensitive around the infertility topic. This my family knows. Days ago, we got together with family for dinner. All of a sudden, my sister and her husband announced that they were expecting.

We were stunned, me and my husband I mean. As for the others they were thrilled. As everyone got up to congratulate them. My husband got up, pushed his chair to the side and walked out.

They all stared at me but I got up and told my sister she messed up by announcing her pregnancy like this and with 0 consideration for my husband knowing how he feels about this topic.

She got defensive saying his 'issues' with the topic weren't her problem, and that she and her husband were fed up walking on eggshells around him. I called her selfish and cruel, but she complained that he ruined their joy and that I made it worse by making a scene.

I told her she shouldn't have chosen my parents house, but she said it's not my place to dictate what she does in our parents house. My mom asked me to go home and I went.

It's been horrible. My parents think I've reacted poorly and should apologize to my sister on both mine and my husband's behalf after the scene we made at their home.

Comments:

ElectronicRub1716 says:

YTA sorry. Unfortunate situation but where else is your sister supposed to announce that she's pregnant? Or is she supposed to keep it a secret?

imabroodybear says:

wtf. It just sounds like a private heads up or doing it when they’re not there would have been more considerate. It blindsided them, as anyone could have predicted.

biancanevenc says:

I'd be inclined to vote ESH. Sister should have given OP advance notice. That would have been the kind thing to do. Still, as hurt as OP and her husband were, OP has no business telling her sister she couldn't announce her pregnancy at a family gathering at the parents' house. She should have just excused herself and left with her husband.

eevreen says:

A lot of folks who have family struggling with infertility tell the infertile couple first or at least separately so they can break the news gently.

Incantanto says:

tbh
if I knew my sibling struggled with infertility I'd try and give them a heads up before a big public announcement where they have to have their face on and can't go cry in a corner for a bit to deal with the feelings before then being happy for me.

MyShoulderHatesMe says:

While that would be a considerate thing to do, OP and her husband are still in the wrong here. Their experience and pain doesn’t excuse the way they behaved.

Sources: Reddit
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