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Woman refuses to be aunt to kids sister had with her ex; parents are furious. AITA?

Woman refuses to be aunt to kids sister had with her ex; parents are furious. AITA?


"AITA for telling my estranged sister and our parents that she and her kids are not my problem?"

7 years ago I was married and expecting a baby when things went horribly wrong. Around 10 weeks into my pregnancy I suffered a miscarriage and then I returned home to find my husband in bed with my sister. The two of them tried to apologize and convince me that we could all get over it.

But I wanted nothing to do with either of them, and even less so when I found out she had gotten pregnant. My divorce was finalized quickly because I wanted nothing from him other than the divorce and was willing to leave the marriage with nothing but the clothes on my back.

Pretty early I realized my parents were hoping I would want to still be part of the baby's life but I wanted nothing to do with the baby my sister conceived while sleeping with my husband (now ex) as I lay in hospital losing my own pregnancy. I refused any and all contact with my sister and ex. They married and had two more children after the one she conceived during my marriage to him.

I met my current husband when I had distanced myself from my whole family and he was amazing and his family were great. We got married two years ago and his family are nothing short of the best. I adore the nieces and nephews I have gained through my marriage to him and we spend a lot of time together.

Around three months ago my sister called me at work (using my work phone) and told me she needed me and could I please come to her. I hung up the phone and continued about my day. It was several hours later that I got a message from my parents saying I needed to be with my sister.

A few days later I got another call and was told my sister had been pregnant, the baby passed away inside of her and she delivered a stillborn all while he was out sleeping with someone else. My parents and sister expected me to rally around her and I didn't.

Now that some time has passed and she lives with them. I have been inundated with them saying I should meet her kids, be there for them like I am with my husband's nieces and nephews and that I should reconcile with the family. My sister told me how sorry she was again and that she wanted us to make up.

I told the three of them that she and her kids are not my problem and I still want nothing to do with them. My parents are furious and they say I need to forgive because whatever she did, she is now suffering worse than would ever be deserved and her kids are innocent and deserve an aunt. AITA?

From the comments:

CTurple writes:

So, her husband (your ex) was sleeping around on HER TOO??

CraftingSunLove OP responded:

At the very least he left her side while she was delivering their stillborn and cheated in the moment but regardless, he cheated.

Majestic_Tangerine47 writes:

NTA, I say bless and release. But do some soul-searching. If you do want to reconnect with your sister, now is the time where you can do so and have taken the high road throughout.

CraftingSunLove OP responded:

I don't want to. I'd be happy to never have anything to do with her again.

Competitive_Chef_188 writes:

For the sake of your mental health, please cut these toxic people off…I suspect their motives are not pure in nature and likely want to use you. NTA.

CraftingSunLove OP responded:

This feels like my next step. Sever all ties to them. Otherwise they just find ways to contact me.

EnvironmentalRuin863 writes:

NTA. Your sister f**ked around, and now she's finding out. I'm incredibly sorry that either of you had to go through any of that, both the miscarriage/stillbirth and the cheating, but this is karma wrapped in a big f**king bow.

Curious-One4595 writes:

NTA. You don’t need to forgive her. What she did is unforgivable. Tell your parents to tell her she can deal with it like you did; by going out and finding a decent man to make her life with, if any will have her. But you’re not letting her around you or your new family because you’re not her husband mart.

No-Abbreviationss writes:

I’m dying laughing at “Husband Mart.”

Dewhickey76 writes:

It always amazes me when someone begins a relationship by cheating with someone, but somehow gets blindsided when the person cheats on them. Like come on, did you really believe you were 'the one' and their penchant for infidelity would just magically evaporate? The sister is simply caught in the crappy part of the cheater's cycle and finally knows how her sister felt.

Sources: Reddit
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