Family

<h2>AITA for returning my husband&#39;s birthday gift to pay for the birthday cake my daughter baked after he refused to pay her?</h2><blockquote> <p>My daughter (16) has a thing for baking. She bakes cakes and some sweets. She makes money by selling her work to relatives, friends and supposedly us!</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>My husband&#39;s (her stepdad&#39;s) 45th birthday took place a few days ago. He asked my daughter to bake him the birthday cake and she agreed. I told him about paying her, to which he responded &quot;pfff pay her? Get outta here, I&#39;m her dad!&quot;</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>I insisted he pay, saying she&#39;s &quot;a yes&quot; person, and a people&#39;s pleaser, so she won&#39;t outright demand the money from him. He said he&#39;d pay, but days went by and he didn&#39;t pay her a cent.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>I decided to go ahead and sell the wrist watch I bought him as his birthday present, and pay her with that money. He found out and went off on me. I told him he had had enough time to pay her, and he should have paid her even before he received the cake.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>He said that I was teaching her to treat familial relationship as &quot;transactional,&quot; and raising her to be &quot;materialistic.&quot; I explained to him that the time, effort, and even the money she put towards making the cake was significant, but he lashed out calling me an a**hole for raising my daughter to expect so much from family.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>He&#39;s furious and told the whole family about how I took back his birthday gift and returned it. I got enough shame from family members to begin to think that I might be an a**hole for how I dealt with this.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>AITA? Ya&#39;ll, my daughter did want and expect to be paid. If she intended for it to be for free then I would have kept my mouth shut. And also the wristwatch isn&#39;t expensive. I kept the rest of the money after giving my daughter her share.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>INFO:</p><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/dwotw/">dwotw</a> asks:</p><blockquote> <p>Did she spend her own money to make this cake? Was she fine with making the cake without getting payment?</p> </blockquote><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/F54tughi556/">F54tughi556</a> OP&#39;s response:</p><blockquote> <p>Yes, what she gets from me not him.</p> </blockquote><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/SciFiChickie/">SciFiChickie</a> asks:</p><blockquote> <p>Have you talked to your daughter, did she want to be paid? I ask because if my step asked me to make a cake for their birthday, I would consider it my gift, and wouldn&rsquo;t expect to be paid.</p> </blockquote><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/F54tughi556/">F54tughi556</a> OP&#39;s response:</p><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>Yes of course she did. She said it herself but did not say it to him directly.</p> </blockquote><p>Here&#39;s what people think:</p><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/IrelandsFire/">IrelandsFire</a> says:</p><blockquote> <p>Why the heck should he pay his own stepdaughter to make him a cake for his birthday? I really don&rsquo;t get it. Why is everyone making it such a big business transaction when it should just be a stepdaughter making SD a cake because she cares about him? I mean if anything she could use it as like.. publicity for her baking on social media. YTA</p> </blockquote><p> </p><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/pzilla31/">pzilla31</a> says:</p><blockquote> <p>YTA imagine having to pay your own family on your birthday to have them make you a cake. No one cares enough about him to at least bake him a cake or pay for it. Wow. Somehow if the step dad stumbles across this thread: get out now while you can, you deserve better!</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/todayithinkthis/">todayithinkthis</a> says:</p><blockquote> <p>I&rsquo;m making a pan of lasagne for my son&rsquo;s birthday tomorrow. I guess I&rsquo;m supposed to charge him for it? Weird.</p> </blockquote><p> </p><p><a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/BoozeIsFoods/">BoozeIsFoods</a> says:</p><blockquote> <p>YTA... Why is this even a question? You should have offered to pay for the cake if money was an issue - IT&#39;S HIS BIRTHDAY</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

Woman returns husband's birthday gift to pay daughter money he 'owes' her.

AITA for returning my husband&#39;s birthday gift to pay for the birthday cake my daughter baked after he refused to pay her? My daughter (16) has a thing for baking. She bakes cakes and some sweets. She makes money by selling her work to relatives, friends and supposedly us!  My husband&#39;s (her stepdad&#39;s) 45th birthday took place a few days ago. He asked my daughter to bake him the birthday cake and she agreed. I told him about paying her, to which he responded &quot;pfff pay her? Get outta here, I&#39;m her dad!&quot;  I insisted he pay, saying she&#39;s &quot;a yes&quot; person, and a people&#39;s pleaser, so she won&#39;t outright demand the money from him. He said he&#39;d pay, but days went by and he didn&#39;t pay her a cent.  I decided to go ahead and sell the wrist watch I bought him as his birthday present, and pay her with that money. He found out and went off on me. I told him he had had enough time to pay her, and he should have paid her even before he received the cake.  He said that I was teaching her to treat familial relationship as &quot;transactional,&quot; and raising her to be &quot;materialistic.&quot; I explained to him that the time, effort, and even the money she put towards making the cake was significant, but he lashed out calling me an a**hole for raising my daughter to expect so much from family.  He&#39;s furious and told the whole family about how I took back his birthday gift and returned it. I got enough shame from family members to begin to think that I might be an a**hole for how I dealt with this.  AITA? Ya&#39;ll, my daughter did want and expect to be paid. If she intended for it to be for free then I would have kept my mouth shut. And also the wristwatch isn&#39;t expensive. I kept the rest of the money after giving my daughter her share. INFO:dwotw asks: Did she spend her own money to make this cake? Was she fine with making the cake without getting payment? F54tughi556 OP&#39;s response: Yes, what she gets from me not him. SciFiChickie asks: Have you talked to your daughter, did she want to be paid? I ask because if my step asked me to make a cake for their birthday, I would consider it my gift, and wouldn&rsquo;t expect to be paid. F54tughi556 OP&#39;s response: Yes of course she did. She said it herself but did not say it to him directly. Here&#39;s what people think:IrelandsFire says: Why the heck should he pay his own stepdaughter to make him a cake for his birthday? I really don&rsquo;t get it. Why is everyone making it such a big business transaction when it should just be a stepdaughter making SD a cake because she cares about him? I mean if anything she could use it as like.. publicity for her baking on social media. YTA  pzilla31 says: YTA imagine having to pay your own family on your birthday to have them make you a cake. No one cares enough about him to at least bake him a cake or pay for it. Wow. Somehow if the step dad stumbles across this thread: get out now while you can, you deserve better! todayithinkthis says: I&rsquo;m making a pan of lasagne for my son&rsquo;s birthday tomorrow. I guess I&rsquo;m supposed to charge him for it? Weird.  BoozeIsFoods says: YTA... Why is this even a question? You should have offered to pay for the cake if money was an issue - IT&#39;S HIS BIRTHDAY 

AITA for returning my husband&#39;s birthday gift to pay for the birthday cake my daughter baked after he refused to pay her?   My daughter (16) has a thing for baking. She bakes cakes and some sweets. She makes money by selling her work...