Parenting is one of the hardest things someone can do, which means it's supremely easy to mess up. No one is going to be a perfect parent, and almost every parent has "messed up" their kids in some way.
However, there's a massive difference between making unavoidable human mistakes, and upholding a pattern of ignoring and overriding your kid's feelings and needs. Deeply selfish parents will put their kids through hell, and then turn around and expect to be treated with forgiveness later in life without truly doing the work to make amends.
AITA for refusing to help my mom now that her husband is sick and throwing the past in her face when she pleaded with me?
My mom and I (25f) have a contentious relationship. We have been mostly estranged for the last 7 years. I say mostly because she has made some effort to stay in touch while I faded away. My dad died when I was 4. Mom and him were not married but they were together.