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Pregnant woman asks if she was wrong to tell off mother-in-law for ruining baby shower.

Pregnant woman asks if she was wrong to tell off mother-in-law for ruining baby shower.


Hating your mother-in-law is so common it's almost a cliché at this point, but for some reason, these women's overbearing love for their kids translates into a vile hatred for the unsuspecting people they marry.

Reddit user u/throwaway902435 knows this all too well. Her baby shower was supposed to be a happy occasion, but instead, things got ugly when her mother-in-law felt it was the perfect time to question the paternity of her future grandbaby. Things got heated.

Now, this woman is asking the internet, 'AITA (Am I The A**hole) for telling my mother-in-law to shut the f**k up?'

She writes:

I (24f) got married at 18 to my very first boyfriend. We got divorced when I was 19 and it was incredibly messy. He is not someone I want to be around ever again. I met my current husband at 20 and we got married after 2 years together. Everything is going wonderfully and we are expecting our first baby in late August/early September.

My husband knows about my divorce and never told his family but when we were dating his family looked me up and found out. Ever since then they think I’m a “gold digger and a slut.” My husband defends me and we’re lower contact but since getting pregnant we've been in contact with them again. Everything has been smooth except for comments from my mother-in-law every now and then.

I had my baby shower this weekend with just my close friends and family. Everything was going well until my mother in law brought up my divorce in conversation with my mom, making some sort of comment like “Aren’t you glad your first grand baby is with my son and not with her ex husband?”

My mother politely laughed and brushed it off until my mother in law called me over and out of the blue asked “So, tell me the truth between us ladies, is that really my sons baby? Or are you just saying it is so he’ll support you? We all know how you were in the past.”

Everyone stared at me in disbelief (there was only like 6 people there total) I looked at my mil and told her to shut the f*ck up and get out of my house. She told me she was just looking out for her grandbaby and I told her she didn’t have one and she wasn’t welcome in our lives.

She left and my sister-in-law started berating me calling me a b*tch and saying my mother-in-law had every right to question me and I told her if anything I was the opposite of a slut because I have been in only committed relationships.

I feel like I’m going crazy. I don’t understand why she said that, and I also feel like I let my pregnancy hormones get the better of me. Am I the asshole?

Shame on this mother-in-law for holding her daughter-in-law's past against her. All this DIL did was fall in love and get married young. I think most of us have made way bigger mistakes in our teen years that we wouldn't want constantly thrown in our faces.

You can't blame the daughter-in-law for snapping after having her baby shower ruined by her mother-in-law's rude comments. Yes, she could've phrased it more delicately, but having your happy day of celebration ruined by some baseless accusations would set anyone off.

Reddit agreed that this DIL is not 'The A**hole' but her MIL most definitely is. How can she question if her son is the baby's father and at the same time try to excuse her horrid behavior by saying she was just 'looking out for her grandbaby?'

From lil-peanutbutter

NTA. The fact that she has the audacity to say she was “looking out” for her grandchild after questioning if it is her grandchild makes her part of the huge asshole club. Your past is your past and using it against you to make you feel like crap is crap. You were in the right to kick her out and hopefully your husband sticks with you to keep her out.

From madoosles

NTA but I sure hope your husband is telling off both MIL and SIL.

From sphinx_lynx

NTA of course. The silver lining is she gave you everything you need to keep her out of life and that was truly the very best gift she could have given you.

From ServelanDarrow

NTA. And bizarre. How is a divorced woman automatically a slut?? Is this a Jane Austen novel??

From​​​​​​​ ServelanDarrow

NTA. And bizarre. How is a divorced woman automatically a slut?? Is this a Jane Austen novel??

From​​​​​​​ thebabes2

NTA. You and your husband need to get in front of this immediately, together and law down the law. I'd seriously go no contact with people as ugly as this. That sort of poison has no place around your child, because have no doubt, the snide comments won't stop around your child's innocent ears. Let your husband tell her the good news, he can deal with her.

From​​​​​​​ ParsimoniousSalad

NTA. MIL was unbelievably rude. And what is her problem? People get divorced, it's hardly a scandal. With that level of toxic behavior, it's time for you and your husband to cut off both MIL and SIL. (I'm still shaking my head at SIL's comment that MIL had 'every right to question you.'

From​​​​​​​ ColdstreamCapple

NTAHow does making a mistake by marrying someone at 18 somehow turn you into a gold digger????

There’s something wrong with your husbands family if they think that, You have EVERY right to not allow them into your house from now on and your mother in law either has mental health issues or she’s a complete piece of work because who picks a fight like this at a baby shower?????? Good luck OP I suspect you’re going to need it!!

From​​​​​​​ 0eozoe0

NTA. Good for you. You should tell your SIL to stfu up too, while you’re at it. Shame on both of them for thinking that kind of behavior is acceptable. Protect your child from them and let your husband deal with them from now on. Sorry you have to deal with that!

From​​​​​​​ RighteousVengeance

NTA. In your place, I would have done the same thing. She essentially accused you of cheating on your husband, lying, and attempting to saddle your husband with a child that isn't his. And at your baby shower.

That lowers the bar for low-class behavior. Then she has the nerve to play the victim, 'I was just looking out for my grandbaby!'

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