'AITA for for what I said to someone after they called me Kim Kardashian?'
"AITA for for what I said to someone after they called me Kim Kardashian?"
I (f40) freely admit I LOVE social media and pretty much share my life, as per many people. I’m very proud of my accomplishments and deserve to share them. I have 2 beautiful kids (mid teens) who I raise well, I train hard and take a lot of care over my appearance and clothes choices.
I work hard and look after my beautiful home. We’re also lucky to enjoy nice holidays. I share most of this as well as venting about say poor customer service and most of my friends expect this. I accept this isn’t for everyone but they can just scroll past.
This involves my sister’s SIL (her DH's sister) [editor's note DH = Dear Husband]. Let’s call her Sam (45). We are linked on SM and see each other occasionally at my sisters. Sister and Sam post a bit but not much and rarely comment on my posts. Up to them.
Sister has 2 kids, late teens. Sam does not have kids. I heard unofficially from sis a few years ago that she’d had fertility treatment which hadn’t worked. We’ve never spoken about it. Sister’s daughters ADORE Sam. She’s also their Aunty. When she’s there I don’t get a look-in. She spoils them. I think she does it on purpose.
We were at sister’s house for a pre-Christmas party. I was taking photos and eldest niece (16) wanted to vet them before I posted them. This went on a bit too long (she looked good in all of them). My daughter does the same and I eventually made an executive decision to post the perfect picture anyway. Niece was upset.
Sam took her side (sis was out of the room) and said it was up to niece. I said she couldn’t always get her own way, she needed to learn life was about compromise. Sam said we weren’t the Kardashians, and niece had the right of veto.
Calling me Kim Kardashian felt so disrespectful and I said I was proud of family and she would understand if she’d had her own kids. She flinched but didn’t really respond and was icy to me all evening. My DH apologised to her on my behalf (!) which she didn’t even accept, and niece actually shouted at me.
Later my sister and even BIL were angry when they found out (called me later). But I didn’t refer to her infertility and what she said was really disrespectful, as if she was better than me. Am I really the AH here?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
YTA I think there is a reason you are not the favourite aunt.
I don’t spoil my kids. I don’t spoil my nieces either. She seems to be happy to do that.
Yeah YTA. If a child doesn’t want their picture on social media take one without them to post. That’s an insanely low blow to comment on somebody’s infertility. There’s not really ever a justifiable reason to say something like that to someone OP.
I didn’t refer to her infertility. She doesn’t know I know about it.
YTA. I think what this comes down to is your niece is old enough to consent, or NOT, to having a photo posted of her. Full stop. Nothing else matters. This is about respecting someones wishes, and you didn't.
I hear that you love your family and are proud to share them with the world, that is sweet, but NOT at the expense of their comfort. You didn't respect your niece, and you should have. The. End.
My niece looked great in all the pictures and she posts a lot herself. These pics were just as nice as the ones she posts herself. I suspect she may have been rejecting ones that Aunty Sam didn’t look so good in.
YTA If anyone doesn't feel great about posting a picture online you dont post it. Retake one without the nice or take the perfect picture or just dont post. On top of that you weaponized your Sisters trauma and personal issues. Being called Kim K is not an insult either. How are you even N-T-A
I felt it was an insult because she clearly looks down on sm so will have felt that was an insult. I don’t look down on Kim.
KenzieMayRae writes:
YTA. I think what this comes down to is your niece is old enough to consent, or NOT, to having a photo posted of her. Full stop. Nothing else matters. This is about respecting someones wishes, and you didn't.
I hear that you love your family and are proud to share them with the world, that is sweet, but NOT at the expense of their comfort. You didn't respect your niece, and you should have. The. End.
BuT sHe WaS tAkInG tOo LoNg!