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Young man tells people at dad's reunion party he got kicked out on his 18th birthday.

Young man tells people at dad's reunion party he got kicked out on his 18th birthday.


People say that honesty is the best policy, but the truth isn't always pretty, and the whole vibe can shift when an uncomfortable truth is dropped.

In many cases, the people who cringe the most at an honest regaling are those indicted by the truth - a family member who didn't show love, a friend who failed you, or someone cheating in their line of work.

Sometimes the backlash to honesty can be so extreme it creates doubt about whether telling the truth is inappropriate.

In a popular post on the AITA subreddit, a man asked if he was wrong for telling the kids of his dad's friends the truth about his 18th birthday.

He wrote:

AITA for telling the truth about my eighteenth birthday and embarrassing my father to his university friends?

So, bluntly, I (20m) was an unwanted child. A whoops pregnancy that my parents were too religious to abort. As a result, I pretty much raised myself until I was kicked out at eighteen. I won’t lie, it hurt being rejected by the people who were supposed to love me, but I’m at peace with it. With that Tragic Backstory TM out of the way, about six months ago, my parents reached out and started by apologizing profusely.

I wasn’t sure about getting back in contact, but they seemed genuine, so I tentatively went ahead. Things were going well, until invited me to meet up in person: I showed up at the restaurant expecting a quiet dinner and a heart-to-heart, instead I found out that my father’s fraternity had rented out the whole damn place for a twenty-five year reunion.

He met me at the door and told me to act like we’re a happy family in front of his old friends. I, being hungry as hell at this point, made a beeline for the buffet. He promised me dinner, and by god, I was going to I have it. I tried to blend into the background, until I got to chatting with some other folks my age, my father’s friend’s kids I assume.

They started talking about their parents and I nodded and smiled along. Then I was directly asked what I got for my eighteenth birthday, and I didn’t know what to say, so I defaulted to the truth.

“So, what did your parents get you for your eighteenth?”

“Umm… I got kicked out.”

cue awkward silence

“Oh my god, are you ok? That sounds awful!“

“Yeah, I’m fine, I just moved in with my aunt while I go to [my college], where do y’all go?”

They then got to gossiping about their schools, and I made myself scarce shortly afterward.

Later that night, my father started blowing up my phone, admonishing me for “embarrassing” him. Apparently, what I said had gotten back to my father’s friends who are now being very cold to my father. He was angry with me because “it wouldn’t have been a big deal to just lie and save face” and now he’s in hot water with his university friends.

I muted him and went to bed. I was sure that I was in the right here, but now I’m having doubts. I’m worried that my parents might not want to keep in contact after I basically threw a monkey wrench into his relationships with his university friends. So, AITA?

People quickly gave their two cents.

Chaos-in-a-CookieJar wrote:

NTA 100%. First and foremost, you will never be TA for telling the truth. I don’t mean any offense when I say this, but It’s clear you are not at peace with what your parents did to you. Even in that last paragraph, you’re still seeking the approval of the people who never cared about you at all.

The fact that he told, not asked but told you to play happy family for his friends, is telling that they’re not sorry at all. Even if they do go NC, don’t sweat it, they don’t deserve you after what they’ve done.

Cracker_Bites wrote:

NTA. They lied to you to save face and play happy families when truthfully, it was an absolute farce. You're never the AH for telling the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. May they enjoy their time in the fiery pit when it's their turn, because right now they are iced out by their fraternity friends! I hope you have a safe, happy and bright future, OP.

Sweetx2023 wrote:

That old line - every kid deserves parents but not every parent deserves kids. Definitely NTA. This whole situation is so infuriating. Children are not a shiny decoration to take out and display to impress friends.

OP I hope you are doing well for yourself and have some healthy relationships with other family members. Don't worry about if your parents want to keep in contact with you - YOU decide whether or not you want them to be part of your life.

Apprehensive-hippos wrote:

NTA. This is probably hurtful to receive, and I don't like to pile on after what you've been through with them (before and after getting kicked out), but they clearly only contacted you so they could save face with his frat bros & their families since they knew he had a kid.

They didn't even prep you for this event. They, in all probability, figured you were a regular person with normal familial feelings (unlike them), and took advantage by surprising you at the door with a demand that you play happy families so they could pretend to be decent parents for a night. And it worked, to an extent, because you're now wondering if you're the a**hole for telling the truth.

Your parents aren't good people, and they certainly haven't improved since they gave you the boot. Focus on yourself, and don't give them - or the situation they got themselves into with the frat bros - any of your time or concern. I hope the buffet was at least decent.

OP absolutely deserves better, and clearly is light years away from being TA here.

Sources: Reddit
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