Woman refuses to tell boyfriend where and why she buried all their beans. UPDATE
'My girlfriend buried all of my beans in the woods and won't tell me where...'
With all that is going on, we have stocked up on supplies, including some canned goods. I ordered a few weeks ago 30 cans of beans. 10 are black beans, 10 are kidney beans, and 10 are pink beans. Also, I ordered 15 cans of chickpeas. I thought this is a reasonable amount of beans and chickpeas to have every now and then and would last for quite some time.
However last night I opened the cabinet because I wanted to make a vegetarian chili using two cans of beans, but all of the beans were gone. What the hell?
I asked my girlfriend and she told me she buried all of the beans in the woods.
At first I thought she was joking, but she explained, no, she had buried the beans in the woods. WTF?
I asked her to explain and she told me she was afraid that 'if things get bad' we might have to worry about 'looters or whatever' and that the beans would be in danger of being stolen. I said I thought this was completely ridiculous and unlikely. She became angry at me and said she 'is protecting our beans.'
According to her logic, the beans are safely buried in the woods behind our apartment complex, and if we ever need some beans she will go to the 'stash' and dig up a can or two, but would prefer if we save them all for 'if things get worse'.
I said why only bury the beans, why not bury our more valuable items? She said the canned food was most valuable for long-term means, and that since we get fresh food in our online grocery deliveries, it would make sense to continue to stockpile beans. She intends to go bury more beans in the woods every week.
This was too insane for me and I got very upset. I demanded to know where the beans were buried, and she refused to tell me. She said if I knew she was afraid I'd dig them up, I said damn right I would. She said 'I will never jeopardize the beans.' I crossed the line and said she was out of her mind, she stormed away. We have not talked since last night.
I think it is completely ridiculous to bury the beans in the woods and I want to find them and dig them up, but apparently my girlfriend is taking this very seriously. How can I convince her to tell me where the beans are?
And do you think I should convince her to get therapy or something or should I break up with her? So confused. Is this normal for a girlfriend to bury beans or otherwise hide them?
Reddit said:
I think a lot of people stockpiled canned goods at that point. And toilet paper. I can't say I know anyone that buried it though.
Are we getting Holes 2 a long awaited sequel to award winning Holes 2003?
Does she realise the cans will corrode if they are just burried like that in the ground?
Go into the woods and look for recently disturbed ground, my dude. She’s psycho. If it was really about looters (I read your first two posts this week) why isn’t she hiding other items?
Two days later, the OP provided a surprising update.
The following day I tried to put my foot down, and I'm not usually a foot downer but there are rare issues where compromise is out of the question, and I foolishly decided this was one of those issues.
I demanded to know where the beans were buried and I told her if she was going to bury beans I paid for in the woods that I would move out. We fought about it and I kept insisting.
In hindsight I should have just let it go and created my own hidden stash of beans in the apartment, and given her time to maybe cool down about this bean burying scenario, but I blew it all out of proportion.
Yeah it's weird to bury beans in the woods but why did I have to press it? What's the harm at the end of the day? In the grand scheme of things?
But I kept demanding her to take me to the beans, or at least draw a map or something, and finally she BROKE UP WITH ME. Over the beans. I have lost the love of my life because I couldn't let the damn beans go.
I am in disbelief. She moved out. Not only am I heartbroken but I am now paying full rent instead of 50% which is a huge financial issue for me.
TL;DR - I kept demanding that my girlfriend show me where she buried the beans in the woods and she got so angry at me that she ended our relationship and moved out. My heart is shattered and my finances are jeopardized because of a bean hoard.
Reddit responded to this unexpected news.
You didn't f-up. You got lucky. You found out about the crazy before you married her. Your heart will heal and you will figure out the money.
Well where are the beans?
You dodged a bullet. Whatever cloud over your head should be cleared away by repeating the line 'she left over a can of beans' OF F*CKING BEANS!!! Do you know how crazy that is, they weren't even hers. Give her parents a call on the phone get your beans back and get that girl the f*ck out of your life.
It's really sh*tty when someone walks out like that. I've taken it in the shorts financially when someone didn't pay their rent for an extended period, but helped out with other bills a bit, then walked out and, overnight.
It went from: 'Oh, this month she says she'll be able to pay her half and I'll only have to pay my half' to 'Oh, I'm going to have to pay 100 percent for the foreseeable future.' It can take you from being comfortable to scraping by, and it's really unfair to do to someone.
She hid the beans and she thought it was funny. She even tried to be cute about it. You thought it was serious and threatened to move out. She broke up with you not because of the beans, but because you were ready to break up over beans.
AGAIN, she broke up with you because you:
a) didn't think her prank was cute or funny, and
b) you valued a case of beans more than you did the relationship.
The other possibility is that you have horrible gas and she didn't want you eating any more beans than you already have.