Man openly admits he's peed in friend's shower, she's grossed out and 'uncomfortable.'
Shower habits are something you'd think was universal, but there are surprising differences between how people spend their time in the water. While some have a 5-minute efficiency mode, others like to linger, while some have a methodical scrubbing regimen, others like to piss and sing and let it all out.
In a popular post on the AITA subreddit, a man asked if he was wrong for revealing he regularly pees in the shower, even at friends' houses. He wrote:
'AITA for peeing in my friend's shower?'
I (22FtM) was staying at a friend's place a few months ago over my spring break. Let's call her Natalie (23F). Natalie and I have been friends for a while, but we haven't been able to hang out as much since she graduated last year and has been working.
This was my first time seeing her new place, and our first time spending the night together (before anyone gets the wrong idea, there are absolutely no romantic or sexual feelings between us).
Now, as a guy without a p*nis, I am unable to enjoy the wonders of pissing standing up most of the time. STPs scare me and so I simply sit. However, when I shower I can pee however I'd like and it just goes down the drain and washes off my leg if I aim badly! I shower every night before bed and I basically always pee, it's just really satisfying for me.
I don't really talk to my friends about my peeing habits, but my whole family pees in the shower as well and I just assumed it was normal. Last week, me and Natalie were hanging out with some of our friends. Somehow, we started talking about peeing, and so of course peeing in the shower came up.
Many of my p*nisless friends agreed with me that it's so nice to be able to stand for once, and many of my p*nis-having friends even agreed as well. However, not everyone felt that way, and there was a bit of an awkward silence afterward. Natalie approached me later and nervously asked me if I had peed in her shower, and I said yes. She got really quiet and the whole thing got really awkward.
She kinda shuffled away and we sort of avoided each other the rest of the evening. Later, one of our mutual friends texted me to tell me Natalie was really uncomfortable to learn that I peed in her shower, and she was reconsidering whether she would ever let me stay with her again. I texted her about it directly and apologized, but she hasn't replied yet. So AITA for peeing in her shower?
People discussed their own shower thoughts in the comment section.
ilp456 wrote:
YTA. What you do in your home is not what you necessarily do in another person’s home. This was disrespectful.
peternal_pansel wrote:
Even though the other person has no way of knowing, it’s not exactly polite to piss in other people’s showers. I pee in my own for the same fun reasons as you OP (and clean it daily) but not in someone else’s if I’m spending the night. They don’t expect me to pee in there- it’s not customary to do so- so I don’t.
If you choose to continue to pee in her shower after this, she won’t know; it’s an honor system. But you’re better off (1) apologizing again (2) promising not to do it again (3) offering to clean the shower out more often if you aren’t already cleaning it after each use.
trama_from_my_mama wrote:
There are two types of people in the world: People that pee in the shower, and liars.
Puzzleheaded_Debt727 wrote:
NTA. Does not make the shower more gross peeing in it. With the constant water flow and soap you are using on yourself that rinses down. It washes the pee that is mostly water anyway away. Also better for the environment to pee in the shower. Uses less water than a toilet and not using toilet paper. Toilet paper is not great for the earth either.
Why lots of places outside of North America use a bidet. It's a personal preference. The disgusting argument from some people here has no scientific evidence of germ build-up or bacteria from peeing in the shower. So no relevance in this argument for people saying that. If it's a personal preference on your friend's part. you can apologize and move on.
But don't feel bad. Peeing in the shower is actually perfectly hygienic. I am pretty sure people have washed worse things off themselves after a hard day of manual labour. Do construction workers clean their shower every time after they use it? All the drywall dust, dirt and other material that goes down the shower pipes has be worse than a little bit of pee.
Just sourcing some of my argument :)
https://greatist.com/discover/peeing-in-the-shower#environmental-relief
Disastrous-Belt7497 wrote:
YTA. What makes you think it's ok to pee in any other shower but yours?
Sufficient_Pain_5724 wrote:
NTA. Who gets out of the shower to take a whiz? As long as it was washed down the drain, no harm no foul. If there's a plausible chance that it wasn't washed down, you might be TA.
Clearly, the internet is divided on this, which means we need you to weigh in.