My ex-husband and I got divorced years ago. We shared custody of our 2 kids: 9 & 12. I got remarried to my current husband. He adores the kids so much. However, he always struggled with this overprotective/jealous attitude when it came to the kids' father.
Their father passed away suddenly days ago and the funeral was yesterday.
My husband didn't want the kids to be there without him. He asked if he could come to support them through the service and I agreed.
We got to the funeral and we were able to stand near my former in-laws and their relatives.
So what happened was that my husband started having random conversations with them. He basically talked about what how close he is to the kids and what he does with them and how much time he spends with them. My former MIL side eyed ME. for some reason.
I told my husband to stay quiet and he did. Moments later, after my daughter started sobbing while hugging her aunt and uncle, my husband muttered something then pulled my daughter to his side and said to me 'hey, at least now we won't have to worry about who's gonna have the children for Christmas, right?'
I was stunned. My former BIL stared at us both and former MIL and her daughter put on some distance. I was floored by what he said. He said it loud enough that the other guests heard. I immediately pulled him close and whispered for him to leave.
He tried to argue but I insisted he leave. He left and then later threw a fit saying that I shouldn't have kicked him out like that. I told him he made an insensitive comment which he called 'just him being realistic and straightforward'.
He said I made a scene in front of everybody, prevented him from supporting the kids which's the reason why he came in the first place.
Now he's saying that by having him leave in the middle of the funeral like that, confused the kids and sent them the wrong message. he's expecting an apology from me also. AITA?
Here's what people are saying:
NTA. Is he always this abusive to your children? Being happy that their father died is absolutely horrible and Y W B T A to your children if you let him stay in their lives. Do you think the comments are going to stop? No, he is thrilled to finally have 100% control over them.
Nta your husband seems to be weirdly jealous of a dead person and felt no shame trying to one up this person at their funeral. Dear op, your husband could benefit from some therapy to deal with his feelings as this could severely impact your children
Your current husband will now take the opportunity to try and erase your ex husband, your children's dad, from their lives. This is appalling and I strongly suggest you nip this in the bud immediately
YTA if you stay with him after saying and acting that way towards the father of YOUR children.
His jealousy overbore his empathy. Maybe tell him he is not doing your kids and himself any good by cheering over the death of a person they love.
NTA. You must have sore legs from skiing downhill while trying to dodge those red flags.
I'm sorry for your loss and that you were embarrassed at such a sad occasion.