Husband begs for gift advice for deeply thoughtful wife, Reddit delivers. UPDATED
Gift giving is an art.
It is a blessing and a curse when someone you love has the, well, gift. We get to be showered in perfect, thoughtful gifts that show we are truly loved. It's a wonderful feeling. But then, when it is time to give that love back, it can be daunting to think of exactly how to show you're true appreciation. One husband was consistently dazzled by the thoughtful nature of his wife's incredible gifts and he wanted to show her the same compassion. He was stumped, so he turned to Reddit with a refreshingly wholesome question.
My (39m) wife (39f) gets me the best gifts and she's so hard to shop for
My wife is an amazing gift giver. So very thoughtful and creative. I thought I outdid her this year by purchasing many small gifts that catered to her likes for Xmas but again she blew me out of the water. She has proceeded to outdo me yet again for my 40th birthday by booking me several different reservations at Galaxies Edge at Disney to different buildable workshops.
She has knocked it out of the park yet again. I absolutely adore how she’s so great and thoughtful when it comes to the gifts she gives. But for her 40th later this year I have no idea how to even come close. She has always wanted to do the food and wine festival at Epcot and I am planning on doing that.
She has also mentioned that you can hire nannies to watch your kids at the parks so that you can do your own thing so I’m planning on incorporating that as well. The problem is I don’t know what else to do. She’s not materialistic at all and never wants anything except a new bag or backpack every so often.
But even then she never wants an expensive one. I just feel like I’m not spending enough by comparison and it’s making me feel bad about the gifts I give her.
Here were the top responses from readers after the initial post:
My brothers ex girlfriend was like your wife, and he too felt like you, one year he gave her a jar with little notes in it, and every Wednesday he had her pick a note from that jar, the notes were what they were going to do that weekend(had her pick mid week just in case they needed a sitter) they went rock climbing, white water rafting.
A theme park close to us dinner and movie in, midnight picnic. He had all of the family and her family and friends fill the jar. It was quite fun for them. And they had a blast! And he always took a picture from the outings and gave her a photo album when the last piece of paper came out of the jar. May not help you this birthday but just a suggestion for the future.
I think you're a little in your head here! Has she ever said anything negative about what you get her or is this all coming from you based on what you think about her gifts for you? Your gift ideas sound great!
Remember - it's not about how much money you spend! It's about showing that you know and care about the other person - which it sounds like you have done.
I get it! My husband is an awesome gift giver, too. He’s a natural at it and I don’t understand how he always pulls off something amazing…So, I’m going to share what he did for me for my 40th, in case you find it helpful since you mentioned Epcot.
My husband paid for us to take a helicopter tour over Epcot to see the fireworks and watch the water show from the sky. It was an absolutely unforgettable experience - extra special because he kept it a secret and made the pilot and flight staff also swear to secrecy… so I had no idea what was happening until the music started in my headphones when we were hovering way above Disney.
Not quite the same experience, but earlier that same day he also booked us an excursion to go on an Everglades swamp boat tour. I’m a nature lover, so it was an awesome gift for me. Hope that helps!
I'd consider myself a great gift giver and so would my fiance and a lot of my friends. Not to brag or anything. But what I do is I keep a running list of things.
My fiance mentions a fancy book bag he wants but won't get himself. Goes on my list. My friend mentions the just moved in and haven't had wine glasses for over a year there's a list. It's taking notes of things and paying attention to what the other person wants/needs. Part of gift giving is taking note in the other person.
Maybe go window shopping to the mall at some point. Watch your wife. See what she says she likes when walking around and doesn't. And then take note of that and surprise them with it later.
Gift giving shouldn’t be a competition and you shouldn’t try to outdo your wife. That’s just setting you up for failure and will make you into an a**hole. You need to get out of that mindset.
As for what to do for her birthday, just do and get her things that you think she would love. Like the wine festival at Epcot and having an adult time at Disney. You could also get her something sentimental like a mothers ring/necklace.
The OP turned out taking these comments and suggestions to heart. He returned a week later with the news:
(UPDATE) My (39m) wife (39f) gets me the best gifts and she's so hard to shop for
So during dinner tonight I straight up told her that I’d like to go to the food and wine festival at Epcot this year for her birthday and get a nanny to go to the park with the kids. And then I asked her if there was anything else she’d like for her birthday.
She said she would love to stay at one of the resorts with the new skyline that connects it to the parks. I said “done” and told her let’s start putting aside money for it now because we have until October and we are single income.
So she is super excited for it and honestly so am I because haven’t been to a park “alone” in almost 14 years. Thanks to everyone that offered advice!
COMMENTS
That sounds wonderful!
Pro tip: Check out Disney Food Blog on Instagram for a guide for the food and wine festival if you want to see what food/drinks there are to get and where. Personal favorite drink of mine is the Violet Sake drink in the Japan pavilion :)
The title made me think this was Ben Wyatt looking for gift ideas for Leslie Knope, so the update being that she wanted to spend time in the parks is perfect.
You mentioned in your OP that she likes bags. Loungefly makes really cute Disney inspired bags and accessories. Just in case you want a physical gift to give her while you’re there. 😉 Hope y’all have a great time!
This is so wholesome for this hell site 🥰 I hope you have the best vacation ever! Treat it like a second honeymoon and enjoy the time without your kids together!
You two are way too cute. Have a great time without the kids.