I f31 am gonna be hosting Christmas celebration this year. The menu is usual and everyone is familiar with it. My SiL's kids are what they call the most vicious picky eaters out there. Mind you they're 6 & 9 and are probably just being deliberately difficult to their parents.
SiL called to 'inform' me that she will be bringing food for her kids to eat at Christmas dinner. I asked why and she said that they will not be able to eat anything from the menu after looking at it.
I said I was sorry but there isn't enough space at the table for extra meals and besides that the kids should start learning to be more tolerant to some foods, especially at family holiday gathering where it's expected for everyone to just eat what's in front of them without complaining.
She went on about how difficult kids can be (mostly can't relate but I get it! but still, she should keep in mind that it's probably a passing phase for them and so sucking it up for one dinner wouldn't affect them). She said that I don't get it and that she doesn't want them to stay hungry or feed on snacks. I apologized and declined.
My husband got involved in this and is saying I'm being inconsiderate towards my guests. He said I lose nothing by allowing them to bring food but I disagree because this was not part of my plan. And if anything this should be a teachable moment for the kids to know that they can't expect to be catered for all the time.
He got more upset and told me that his sister is heavily reconsidering coming to a celebratory dinner where her kids weren't allowed to bring their own food. They're applying pressure on me saying I'll ruin the celebration if I keep trying to die on this hill. AITA?
Here's what people said:
YTA. It’s not your place to provide a teachable moment. Get over yourself. She’s not asking you to cook special food and is bringing it herself. Their food can be put on their plate so your no room argument makes no sense. Make sure to dress up as Scrooge for the meal. YTA
Exactly this. You don’t choose the teachable moments for someone else’s kids. Your husband is right, it costs you nothing to be gracious. You don’t have to do anything extra. She was just being courteous by giving you a heads up. Don’t make this a thing. Let everyone enjoy the day.
Ironically this is a perfect teachable moment for OP that you're going to have to accept.
Isn't it amazing how casually adults feel free to enforce 'teachable moments' on children, even other people's children whose parents vehemently disagree with this, while they themselves are fully entitled to act like immature, spoiled brats?
I’m surprised at the hypocrisy of the comments here. A few days ago there was a post - pretty much the same - where the kids were 17 and 15 I think. Everyone seemed to agree the kids were TAH or at least their mother was for wanting her fussy eaters accommodated. Now everyone is saying this woman is TAH.