Humor

<h2>Sometimes someone gives you an excuse or explanation for their behavior that&#39;s so brutally bad that it&#39;s both impressive and hilarious...</h2><p>So, when a <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/55z20e/whats_the_dumbest_explanation_that_you_have_ever/" target="_blank">Reddit</a> user asked, &quot;What&#39;s the dumbest explanation that you have ever heard for something?&quot; people were ready to share the moments that made them question whether or not the person in front of them had a fully functioning brain. There might not be any &quot;dumb questions,&quot; but there are certainly some questions that make you seriously evaluate your faith in humanity.</p><h2>1.</h2><blockquote> <p>Ex boss: you shouldn&#39;t leave on time everyday...you should stay back a little</p> <p>Me: but why?</p> <p>Ex boss: because it looks like you aren&#39;t working as hard...to others...</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Me: but I come in to work a half hour early every day!</p> <p>Ex boss: yeah but no one sees that - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/ThomasSchiff/">ThomasSchiff</a></p> </blockquote><h2>2.</h2><blockquote> <p>&quot;Porsches are faster than regular cars because the engine is in the back, so it pushes the car instead of pulls it.&quot; -My friend&#39;s girlfriend, in dead seriousness - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Etryn/">Etryn</a></p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><h2>3.</h2><blockquote> <p>There&#39;s a sign on the wall of the service counter at our local &quot;Mom &amp; Pop&quot; grocery store that reads: &quot;There&#39;s no reason for it, it&#39;s just our policy.&quot; The owner simply points to it if he refuses to give a refund. - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Back2Bach/">Back2Bach</a></p> </blockquote><h2>4.</h2><blockquote> <p>&quot;Dude, people were shorter in the past.&quot; - My friends explanation as to why the shower heads in our dorm were at chest level. The building was built in the 1980&#39;s. Yes, Tom, I&#39;m sure the average height of a person was a full foot shorter in the 1980s then it is now. - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Felicity_Badporn/">Felicity_Badporn</a></p> </blockquote><h2>5.</h2><blockquote> <p>About 20 years ago, my grandparents were on a road trip with my aunt and uncle and they got lost in the middle of the night. They didn&#39;t have smart phones back then, so they had no choice but to stop at a Burger King for directions.</p> <p>My uncle: &quot;Excuse me, we&#39;re lost. Where are we?&quot;</p> <p>Cashier: &quot;Burger King.&quot; - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/rahsftw/">rahsftw</a></p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p> </p><h2>6.</h2><blockquote> <p>I had just moved into a new apartment and the maintenance guy was showing me around. The smoke detector was beeping, so I pointed out that it needed new batteries/ needed to replaced. He responded &quot; No it just does that so you know that it&#39;s turned on.&quot; - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/smashinjin10/">smashinjin10</a></p> </blockquote><h2>7.</h2><blockquote> <p>When I lived in Wisconsin a classmate told us she was moving to Milwaukee to get &quot;the f*ck out of this state.&quot; We were seniors. - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/saywhatreverend/">saywhatreverend</a></p> </blockquote><h2>8.</h2><blockquote> <p>Mars is red so it must be hot.... - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/christo334/">christo334</a></p> </blockquote><h2>9.</h2><blockquote> <p>Absolute dumbest thing: Flies can stick to the ceiling cause &quot;they ain&#39;t got no gravity.&quot; It hurt to have a conversation with this guy - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/medfordfats/">medfordfats</a></p> </blockquote><h2>10.</h2><blockquote> <p>Islands float because solids are lighter than liquids, which is also why ice cubes float - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/MJR_disappointment/">MJR_disappointment</a></p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><h2>11.</h2><blockquote> <p>Compasses work because there are a lot of iron rich mountains in the antarctis - [deleted]</p> </blockquote><h2>12.</h2><blockquote> <p>You can&#39;t drive from New York to Canada because New York is a state and Canada is a different country. She said this to me as I was explaining that I had driven from New York to Canada the previous week. I still don&#39;t understand. It&#39;s been nearly 15 years since that moment and it still blows my mind every time I think about it. - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/GunzGoPew/">GunzGoPew</a></p> </blockquote><h2>13.</h2><blockquote> <p>That it didn&#39;t rain when the stars were out. She didn&#39;t understand that it meant that there were no clouds. She thought the stars were blocking the rain... - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/c4stiel/">c4stiel</a></p> </blockquote><h2>14.</h2><blockquote> <p>&quot;I know this paper says you&#39;re being underpaid, but we do that intentionally. We pay you less so we can afford to give better raises when we promote you!&quot; - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/ostentia/">ostentia</a></p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><h2>15.</h2><blockquote> <p>Deer turn into elk based on elevation - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/MJR_disappointment/">MJR_disappointment</a></p> </blockquote><h2>16.</h2><blockquote> <p>&quot;You didn&#39;t get a 100% (perfect score) on your test because only God is perfect.&quot; - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/derpman453/">derpman453</a></p> </blockquote><h2>17.</h2><blockquote> <p>A guy at work says the world must be flat because if it was round, people in Australia would just fall off, as they&#39;re on the bottom. I tried to explain how that&#39;s not the case and, like with many of his arguments, he replied, &quot;That&#39;s what they want you to believe.&quot; He was dead serious about it too. - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/nolooselips/">nolooselips</a></p> </blockquote><h2>18.</h2><blockquote> <p>&quot;That&#39;s the way we&#39;ve always done it.&quot; That&#39;s not a good reason managers! - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/howispellit/">howispellit</a></p> </blockquote><h2>19.</h2><blockquote> <p>When I was young and in Sunday school, we were talking about proper burial rites, and my teacher said that cremation was a major sin, because it made it hard for Jesus to resurrect you on Judgement Day. - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/MoccaFixGold/">MoccaFixGold</a></p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><h2>20.</h2><blockquote> <p>In high school, talking about 2001 riots, the teacher says, &quot;and they used horses to break it up.&quot; A girl adds, &quot;Oh, duh, because they didn&#39;t have cars in 2001. Only horses.&quot; - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Ocula/">Ocula</a></p> </blockquote><h2>21.</h2><blockquote> <p>&quot;Fresh food is better for you because microwaves suck all the nutrients out.&quot; Thanks, glad to know that I can just microwave my double chocolate cake and avoid that fat and sugar. - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/HonoraryCassowary/">HonoraryCassowary</a></p> </blockquote><h2>22.</h2><blockquote> <p>Our business moved into a newly-renovated building and had offices on the second floor. They kept the huge windows and put in new sashes, but no screens. When we asked why there weren&#39;t any screens, the building manager told us they weren&#39;t necessary because &quot;the bugs don&#39;t fly up this high. - <a data-testid="comment_author_link" href="https://www.reddit.com/user/vinnydabody/">vinnydabody</a></p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

22 people share the dumbest explanations they've ever been told.

Sometimes someone gives you an excuse or explanation for their behavior that&#39;s so brutally bad that it&#39;s both impressive and hilarious...So, when a Reddit user asked, &quot;What&#39;s the dumbest explanation that you have ever heard for something?&quot; people were ready to share the moments that made them question whether or not the person in front of them had a fully functioning brain. There might not be any &quot;dumb questions,&quot; but there are certainly some questions that make you seriously evaluate your faith in humanity.1. Ex boss: you shouldn&#39;t leave on time everyday...you should stay back a little Me: but why? Ex boss: because it looks like you aren&#39;t working as hard...to others...  Me: but I come in to work a half hour early every day! Ex boss: yeah but no one sees that - ThomasSchiff 2. &quot;Porsches are faster than regular cars because the engine is in the back, so it pushes the car instead of pulls it.&quot; -My friend&#39;s girlfriend, in dead seriousness - Etryn 3. There&#39;s a sign on the wall of the service counter at our local &quot;Mom &amp; Pop&quot; grocery store that reads: &quot;There&#39;s no reason for it, it&#39;s just our policy.&quot; The owner simply points to it if he refuses to give a refund. - Back2Bach 4. &quot;Dude, people were shorter in the past.&quot; - My friends explanation as to why the shower heads in our dorm were at chest level. The building was built in the 1980&#39;s. Yes, Tom, I&#39;m sure the average height of a person was a full foot shorter in the 1980s then it is now. - Felicity_Badporn 5. About 20 years ago, my grandparents were on a road trip with my aunt and uncle and they got lost in the middle of the night. They didn&#39;t have smart phones back then, so they had no choice but to stop at a Burger King for directions. My uncle: &quot;Excuse me, we&#39;re lost. Where are we?&quot; Cashier: &quot;Burger King.&quot; - rahsftw  6. I had just moved into a new apartment and the maintenance guy was showing me around. The smoke detector was beeping, so I pointed out that it needed new batteries/ needed to replaced. He responded &quot; No it just does that so you know that it&#39;s turned on.&quot; - smashinjin10 7. When I lived in Wisconsin a classmate told us she was moving to Milwaukee to get &quot;the f*ck out of this state.&quot; We were seniors. - saywhatreverend 8. Mars is red so it must be hot.... - christo334 9. Absolute dumbest thing: Flies can stick to the ceiling cause &quot;they ain&#39;t got no gravity.&quot; It hurt to have a conversation with this guy - medfordfats 10. Islands float because solids are lighter than liquids, which is also why ice cubes float - MJR_disappointment 11. Compasses work because there are a lot of iron rich mountains in the antarctis - [deleted] 12. You can&#39;t drive from New York to Canada because New York is a state and Canada is a different country. She said this to me as I was explaining that I had driven from New York to Canada the previous week. I still don&#39;t understand. It&#39;s been nearly 15 years since that moment and it still blows my mind every time I think about it. - GunzGoPew 13. That it didn&#39;t rain when the stars were out. She didn&#39;t understand that it meant that there were no clouds. She thought the stars were blocking the rain... - c4stiel 14. &quot;I know this paper says you&#39;re being underpaid, but we do that intentionally. We pay you less so we can afford to give better raises when we promote you!&quot; - ostentia 15. Deer turn into elk based on elevation - MJR_disappointment 16. &quot;You didn&#39;t get a 100% (perfect score) on your test because only God is perfect.&quot; - derpman453 17. A guy at work says the world must be flat because if it was round, people in Australia would just fall off, as they&#39;re on the bottom. I tried to explain how that&#39;s not the case and, like with many of his arguments, he replied, &quot;That&#39;s what they want you to believe.&quot; He was dead serious about it too. - nolooselips 18. &quot;That&#39;s the way we&#39;ve always done it.&quot; That&#39;s not a good reason managers! - howispellit 19. When I was young and in Sunday school, we were talking about proper burial rites, and my teacher said that cremation was a major sin, because it made it hard for Jesus to resurrect you on Judgement Day. - MoccaFixGold 20. In high school, talking about 2001 riots, the teacher says, &quot;and they used horses to break it up.&quot; A girl adds, &quot;Oh, duh, because they didn&#39;t have cars in 2001. Only horses.&quot; - Ocula 21. &quot;Fresh food is better for you because microwaves suck all the nutrients out.&quot; Thanks, glad to know that I can just microwave my double chocolate cake and avoid that fat and sugar. - HonoraryCassowary 22. Our business moved into a newly-renovated building and had offices on the second floor. They kept the huge windows and put in new sashes, but no screens. When we asked why there weren&#39;t any screens, the building manager told us they weren&#39;t necessary because &quot;the bugs don&#39;t fly up this high. - vinnydabody 

Sometimes someone gives you an excuse or explanation for their behavior that&#39;s so brutally bad that it&#39;s both impressive and hilarious...  So, when a Reddit user asked, &quot;What&#39;s the dumbest explanation that you have ever...