When this woman is annoyed with her SIL, she asks Reddit:
I (36 F) and husband (40 M) are hosting Thanksgiving for the first time ever this year. Our older nephew (20 M) has recently come out as gay and asked if he could bring his bf he’s been seeing for a few months.
We said of course!!! Last night my MIL called and said my SIL would not be coming. When I asked why she said that it was bc of our nephew bringing the bf. She’s not blood related to him (it’s on my side of fam) but she has been around him most of his life. I told her that was her choice and ended the convo.
This morning SIL calls and asks if I told nephew not to come, I was shocked and asked why I would have. She went on about how she should be able to be with the rest of the family without being “uncomfortable”.
At that point I got so mad I said “what do you think, they’ll screw on top of the turkey in front of Grammy?!” And she started to cry and hung up.
I’ve gotten calls from family all day about how I shouldn’t have handled it that way. My husband thinks it’s funny but his mom whom I’m very close with is very upset. So aita?
NTA this lady sounds like she's a joy to have around. And you didn't uninvite her, she uninvited herself. I say good riddance and enjoy your thanksgiving.
Also, OP didn’t actually uninvite her. She invited everyone, and SIL has the choice whether to come or not. If for whatever (homophobic) reasons, she has an issue with the guest list, then she’s welcome not to come.
But she doesn’t get to dictate the guest list at someone else’s home.
Yes. SIL (or MIL on SIL’s behalf) pulled a passive-aggressive move; she didn’t ask for the nephew’s boyfriend to be uninvited, she said she wasn’t coming and then hoped OP would rearrange things in her favour. And nope. OP accepted that SIL wasn’t coming, end of matter.
MIL’s approach to the “she isn’t coming” exchange indicates that MIL also has issues that she isn’t willing to own up to.