"I (28M) was about to propose to my gf (28f) of 7 years, but then I discovered something. Need advice."

We've been together for 7 years, and we've been really really happy together. She's sweet, loving, and caring.. She's already been close to my family, and me to hers. We are really connected to each other, same passion, same likes and dislikes, we frequently travel together and all.

We rarely fight, and when we do, we resolve issues quickly.. It's like a perfect relationship. We've been steady, we're genuinely happy in love. Just when I was already contemplating on proposing to her, I felt like she's gone cold for the past month. Just this valentines, we were on top of the world surprising one another with gifts and sweet nothings. But the following weeks felt different.

Her "I love yous" weren't as enthusiastic. The way she talks and communicates with me feels different. She easily gets upset over trivial things. She seems to be a different person all of a sudden. I actually asked her what's wrong, but she assures me everything is ok and something is just bugging her.. I asked again but it seems she doesn't want to open up.. She assures me though that she loves me very much.

Then, just recently, like 4 days back, I was reminded that she has a spare phone just sitting on my drawer, phone was dead and was not used for almost la year. So I grabbed on a charger, booted it up.. and it so happened that her google account is still logged in on the device.

Curious, I went to see what she's been up to lately, then I discovered her recent searches /history in google and youtube. I was shocked and I dont know how to react. The searches go like this:

- I cheated on him

- I cheated on him many times

- I cheated should we break up

- Breaking up a long term relationship... and so on

The searches were dated Feb 15 onwards. Almost everyday she looks on the same searches and other related topics.

I am devastated discovering this. I cannot eat, I cannot sleep. But I haven't confronted her about this.

What should I do? Do I need to confront her? We are currently far apart now due to work, but we will be seeing each other next week. I am confused, I am in shock, idk how to react. Please help.

What do you think he should do? This is what top commenters had to say:

Elsa87 said:

Do not marry someone who cheated on you. You will never get over the resentment.

Brunette_Broad said:

Of course you need to confront her. The internet community wont solve this issue. Either you need to be forceful when telling her you feel something is wrong or different and you need to know, to get her to confidence OR you need to be direct and tell her how you know and be prepared for the consequences. Either way you need answers from her.

hypertext01 said:

Thank you all for your advice, they are very much appreciated. I read them all. I'm just completely shattered right now and cant think straight. Everything is happening so fast, I just cant believe that everything we built for 7 years will be could be gone in a snap just like that. I will confront her personally once we see each other next week.

Right now, I will just have to bear the agony of waiting and pretending that I have no idea yet what's going on with her. I'm a mess. thanks all.

SassyPants5 said:

At the very least, you need to discuss it. Sit down somewhere the two of you can talk. Ask her if there is a reason she has been so distant, give her a chance to bring it forward. If not, then you need to ask about the phone. I am sorry. This is an awful situation to be in.

ForkMeHard said:

When you confront her, don't reveal what you saw in the phone. See if she explains what is going on without knowing what YOU know. That is the first step in building back trust if she did cheat... I definitely would not propose until you get a satisfactory answer.

heyhihelloitslala said:

Wow. Well you have to look at it in two different ways. You can either bring it up to her, telling her how you found out. Or ask her what is the matter and point out all of the things you notice that are different. If she has the courage to tell you the truth then respect that but if it were me. I would put marriage on a hold. And see what made her go cheat. Or how it all happened.

Commenters agreed that he needs to confront his wife and, presuming she has been cheating (which appears to be the case), end things — or at least put the engagement on hold.

Two days later, OP dropped this major update:

I'm providing an update to my earlier post. I dont think there is a need for me to see her again next week. So here’s what happened.

-She texted me she got home and about to sleep at 11:44 PM (she’s closing deals in another city and has to rent a place)

-I tried to facetime her 11:51 PM just to say goodnight, she didn’t pick up. I tried messaging her but no response.

Remember that spare phone that’s with me where her google account is logged in? I browsed on her activity history quickly to find out what shes up to, and was surprised there’s a “google assistant” command recorded at 11:48 PM. I played and listened. There’s her voice and a voice of another guy. They were goofing around at the google home device. So yeah.

I confronted her and barraged her with a lot of messages, she only replied at around 1 AM. She kept on denying she’s cheating. Then I laid all the evidences, all the screencaps and even the audio clip recording from the google assistant. She finally admitted. I am single.