life

<p>Families are all about sharing and caring, right?</p><p>Not when it comes to weddings.</p><p>One woman <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/erijgn/wibta_for_cancelling_my_sisters_wedding_because/">is asking Reddit for advice</a> after her family went a little too heavy on the sharing and light on the caring in the wake of her broken engagement.</p><p>The woman recently ended her engagement at the 11th hour &mdash; and her sister wants to just slot herself into the existing wedding plans. The OG bride&#39;s now wondering if it would be rude to call around and cancel all the plans so that her sister can&#39;t do this.</p><h2>The drama started when she caught her former fianc&eacute; cheating:</h2><blockquote> <p>I was meant to get married on the 1st of February, which was mine and my ex-fiance&#39;s anniversary. We ended the engagement shortly after the new year because he cheated on me. The wedding was initially planned with just my money but was very low key, and my parents asked if they could put up some additional money to make the whole thing a bit bigger.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>By the end about 60% of the wedding was paid for by me and 40% my parent&#39;s contribution. My ex and I had agreed that I would pay for the wedding while he covered the honeymoon.</p> </blockquote><h2>The ex decided to leave her in charge of canceling everything (real keeper, this guy):</h2><blockquote> <p>My ex left me to deal with cancelling the wedding as his money wasn&#39;t involved, and I turned to my mother and sister for help because I didn&#39;t have the mental or emotional capacity to call vendors and venues and whatever else and cancel everything.</p> </blockquote><h2>But before she could cancel, her mom and sister came up with their own scheme:</h2><blockquote> <p>My sister is engaged, and helped me with a lot of wedding planning. Next thing I know, my mother and sister are asking me if I wouldn&#39;t mind my sister just.... taking my wedding. Every part of it, from the venue to the cake, and everything in between. The sole difference will be the wedding dress, and even then she&#39;s said if she can&#39;t buy off the rack she might have to get mine tailored to fit her instead.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><h2>The bride is not okay with this:</h2><blockquote> <p>I called off my engagement less than 3 weeks ago. I am a f*cking mess. I reached out to my family to help me cancel the wedding, and my sister is planning to take it over instead.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>My sister has rung round our family explaining that she&#39;s taking over before she told me this. They are all attending. Her fiance has contacted his family and given them the date he will be getting married. I found all this out TODAY. She asked me if I was okay with this, like she hadn&#39;t already arranged everything. I told her to go fuck herself.</p> </blockquote><h2>The train is leaving the station &mdash; but the original bride is thinking of canceling everything:</h2><blockquote> <p>I have until the 23rd to cancel things and get the money back. There&#39;s a couple of things where I won&#39;t get money back at this stage but over 2/3 of it is still refundable. The money will be refunded to the card it was paid by, so both me and my parents will get the correct amounts back.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>Everything is shut right now but it&#39;s the 21st tomorrow. As I&#39;ve not been in contact with these companies and it&#39;s my name on all the contracts, I have full power over this wedding. My sister said she&#39;d pay me back eventually but knowing her I&#39;ll never see that money again.</p> <p>[Would I be the a-hole] if I rung round everything and cancelled?</p> </blockquote><p>To add insult to injury:</p><blockquote> <p>She wants me to be her maid of honour, so I&#39;ll be standing up front in the dress that was meant for her while she stands a few feet away in the dress that was meant for me.</p> </blockquote><h2>Pretty much everyone agrees that this plan is cruel and unusual.</h2><p>It&#39;s easy to see the logic of swapping one bride in for theo ther, as <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/erijgn/wibta_for_cancelling_my_sisters_wedding_because/ff3w6bo/">moongirl12</a> pointed out. But that doesn&#39;t make it right:</p><blockquote> <p>Wtf is wrong with them? I kind of understand the logic, but for f**** sake there was a way to do this without being a total a**hole to you.</p> <p>Depending on your relationship with them I don&rsquo;t know what your course of action should be, but you would be totally justified based purely on how insensitive they were about this whole mess.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>But <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/erijgn/wibta_for_cancelling_my_sisters_wedding_because/ff431kk/">JetzinBerlin</a> says it&#39;s not even that great of a solution, because the bride could otherwise get her money back:</p><blockquote> <p>Seriously, I assumed the only, ONLY reason would be if everything was completely nonrefundable and they&#39;d be out tens of thousands of $/&euro;/&pound;. This - to make her sit through essentially her own wedding, hijacked only weeks after her engagement was destroyed, and when most costs can still be recouped - is just utterly heartless. OP, NTA. I&#39;m sorry you&#39;re going through this.</p> </blockquote><p>Most agree that the sister is pushing it, as <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/erijgn/wibta_for_cancelling_my_sisters_wedding_because/ff3w95u/">c-est-magnifique</a> points out:</p><blockquote> <p>She has jumped on a free wedding. Tell them you can&#39;t handle it emotionally and need to cancel it.</p> </blockquote><p>But <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/erijgn/wibta_for_cancelling_my_sisters_wedding_because/ff43gac/">shtusernametaken</a> cautioned that her family won&#39;t like the cancellation:</p><blockquote> <p>If you do this you WILL piss off everyone in your family and more. Just because you&#39;re NTA doesn&#39;t mean there will not be repercussions of your actions.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>I think it&#39;s time for a sit down with Mom and let it all out. If it&#39;s about the money see if they&#39;ll front it to you. If it&#39;s about her stealing your day, tell Mom and hopefully she will understand and help you come to an agreement.</p> </blockquote><p>Either way, this entire situation is yikes!</p><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

Jilted bride asks if it's okay to cancel wedding venue sister wants to use.

Families are all about sharing and caring, right?Not when it comes to weddings.One woman is asking Reddit for advice after her family went a little too heavy on the sharing and light on the caring in the wake of her broken engagement.The woman recently ended her engagement at the 11th hour &mdash; and her sister wants to just slot herself into the existing wedding plans. The OG bride&#39;s now wondering if it would be rude to call around and cancel all the plans so that her sister can&#39;t do this.The drama started when she caught her former fianc&eacute; cheating: I was meant to get married on the 1st of February, which was mine and my ex-fiance&#39;s anniversary. We ended the engagement shortly after the new year because he cheated on me. The wedding was initially planned with just my money but was very low key, and my parents asked if they could put up some additional money to make the whole thing a bit bigger.  By the end about 60% of the wedding was paid for by me and 40% my parent&#39;s contribution. My ex and I had agreed that I would pay for the wedding while he covered the honeymoon. The ex decided to leave her in charge of canceling everything (real keeper, this guy): My ex left me to deal with cancelling the wedding as his money wasn&#39;t involved, and I turned to my mother and sister for help because I didn&#39;t have the mental or emotional capacity to call vendors and venues and whatever else and cancel everything. But before she could cancel, her mom and sister came up with their own scheme: My sister is engaged, and helped me with a lot of wedding planning. Next thing I know, my mother and sister are asking me if I wouldn&#39;t mind my sister just.... taking my wedding. Every part of it, from the venue to the cake, and everything in between. The sole difference will be the wedding dress, and even then she&#39;s said if she can&#39;t buy off the rack she might have to get mine tailored to fit her instead. The bride is not okay with this: I called off my engagement less than 3 weeks ago. I am a f*cking mess. I reached out to my family to help me cancel the wedding, and my sister is planning to take it over instead.  My sister has rung round our family explaining that she&#39;s taking over before she told me this. They are all attending. Her fiance has contacted his family and given them the date he will be getting married. I found all this out TODAY. She asked me if I was okay with this, like she hadn&#39;t already arranged everything. I told her to go fuck herself. The train is leaving the station &mdash; but the original bride is thinking of canceling everything: I have until the 23rd to cancel things and get the money back. There&#39;s a couple of things where I won&#39;t get money back at this stage but over 2/3 of it is still refundable. The money will be refunded to the card it was paid by, so both me and my parents will get the correct amounts back.  Everything is shut right now but it&#39;s the 21st tomorrow. As I&#39;ve not been in contact with these companies and it&#39;s my name on all the contracts, I have full power over this wedding. My sister said she&#39;d pay me back eventually but knowing her I&#39;ll never see that money again. [Would I be the a-hole] if I rung round everything and cancelled? To add insult to injury: She wants me to be her maid of honour, so I&#39;ll be standing up front in the dress that was meant for her while she stands a few feet away in the dress that was meant for me. Pretty much everyone agrees that this plan is cruel and unusual.It&#39;s easy to see the logic of swapping one bride in for theo ther, as moongirl12 pointed out. But that doesn&#39;t make it right: Wtf is wrong with them? I kind of understand the logic, but for f**** sake there was a way to do this without being a total a**hole to you. Depending on your relationship with them I don&rsquo;t know what your course of action should be, but you would be totally justified based purely on how insensitive they were about this whole mess. But JetzinBerlin says it&#39;s not even that great of a solution, because the bride could otherwise get her money back: Seriously, I assumed the only, ONLY reason would be if everything was completely nonrefundable and they&#39;d be out tens of thousands of $/&euro;/&pound;. This - to make her sit through essentially her own wedding, hijacked only weeks after her engagement was destroyed, and when most costs can still be recouped - is just utterly heartless. OP, NTA. I&#39;m sorry you&#39;re going through this. Most agree that the sister is pushing it, as c-est-magnifique points out: She has jumped on a free wedding. Tell them you can&#39;t handle it emotionally and need to cancel it. But shtusernametaken cautioned that her family won&#39;t like the cancellation: If you do this you WILL piss off everyone in your family and more. Just because you&#39;re NTA doesn&#39;t mean there will not be repercussions of your actions.  I think it&#39;s time for a sit down with Mom and let it all out. If it&#39;s about the money see if they&#39;ll front it to you. If it&#39;s about her stealing your day, tell Mom and hopefully she will understand and help you come to an agreement. Either way, this entire situation is yikes!

Families are all about sharing and caring, right?  Not when it comes to weddings.  One woman is asking Reddit for advice after her family went a little too heavy on the sharing and light on the caring in the wake of her broken engagement. ...